Chapter 147: Just as clear as he imagined
Noah had contemplated how he would approach Michael over and over in his head.
He stayed at a hotel for the first day after arriving, but he wanted to see Michael desperately, so he took a walk around.
He knew where he was staying thanks to tracking the landline number but that didn’t mean he could just approach him.
What would he say? How would he act?
What would be Michael’s reaction?
They hadn’t seen each other in years and yet...
’Will he forgive me for taking too long?’ That was the question that weighed on Noah’s mind more.
He got to the place, saw a flower shop on the bottom floor, and imagined that it was the flower shop Michael was running, thanks to Olivia’s explanation.
A flower shop of that size... It would definitely be peaceful.
He stayed at the side and watched a car pull into the garage, and just as if his breath was caught for a moment, he stopped breathing as he saw Michael walking out with Olivia in his arms.
Noah gulped but he honestly couldn’t feel his breath.
How long had it been?
How long had it been since he set his eyes on the love of his life?
His heart wouldn’t stop thumping, and it wouldn’t stop aching, either. It wouldn’t stop reminding him that he had caused Michael just as much pain with his absence.
’But he looks good.’ Noah thought. ’Just how was he able to look okay despite what he might be feeling?’
Noah wanted to know. He wanted to hear the details, all of it, concerning how Michael fared while he was away.
"Hm? Is someone there?" Michael asked as he noticed someone standing at the corner but Noah instinctively hid. "Hello?"
But there was no response.
"What’s the matter?" Alyssa asked but Michael stayed silent for a moment and then shook his head.
"I think it’s nothing. It was probably someone unrelated passing by." He said but he couldn’t fight off the feeling of familiarity from whoever that was.
Well, he would clear his mind soon.
"Let’s head in. I need to open the shop later." He said to them.
Noah stayed in the corner, his heart racing and his face flushed. He heard Michael’s voice.
Just as clear as he imagined.
"Michael," Noah called, muttering his name as he grabbed his chest. "I really want to see you right now."
He went back to the hotel and contemplated some more. He has to approach without seeming condescending. He couldn’t afford to make Michael think he was overlooking his years of patience and suffering.
He needed to acknowledge Michael’s efforts but then all these needed a strong play of words, which he was not very proficient in.
Words of assurance, words of affirmation, words of acknowledgement... He needed all that when speaking to Michael for the first time in a while but that was the problem.
For someone with a delicate heart like Michael, he would definitely need a soft approach. A very soft approach that will break down whatever walls he was keeping up and standing on all this time.
"I’d hate me if I were him," Noah suddenly mumbled, his eyes sadly rolling to the floor.
He knew he wasted too much time, and under normal circumstances, Michael should’ve given up and moved on but it didn’t look like he wanted to move on.
Leave the mark aside, his heart was very strong that he’d do whatever he set his mind to, no matter how long it was.
Noah decided not to think anymore and just moved his feet.
He arrived around the same time he approached the house the previous day but it looked like no one was in the flower shop.
It wasn’t open yet and the car wasn’t in the garage either.
Where did they go?
He decided to wait instead of going up and soon, the car drove in.
Michael and Roland walked out of the car and while it looked like they got along a lot to make Noah jealous, Noah’s eyes weren’t so blinded by jealousy that he wouldn’t be able to tell if Michael had eyes for someone else or not.
Still, the fact that the rogue doctor had been with him the entire time, taking care of him and seeing to his health made his role so much more important than he who left them to take care of his pack issues.
Just thinking about it made him miserable.
But he did not back out.
Since there would be too many people around for him to have a heart-to-heart talk with Michael if he went up to their house first, he decided he would wait for Michael to open the flower shop.
It didn’t take Michael to come back down, and when he did, his shoulders had fallen sadly.
It was a sight that caused Noah’s heart to ache.
Just what was he doing?
He needed to hurry up and take away that suffering.
He walked into the shop while Michael was putting the flowers in order.
"Welcome. How may I help--" the words froze in Michael’s mouth as he turned to stare at Noah, who had just walked in. "...you?"
The look of disbelief as he scanned Noah was so evident in his eyes that it made Noah even more awkward but he couldn’t back down now.
"I..." He looked at the flowers. "I’m here to get a flower for my lover."
Silence enveloped them after Noah said those words and it made him anxious, his heart racing as he wondered what was going through Michael’s mind after seeing him.
But then, Michael laughed, smiling brightly as he said,
"I can’t believe I still see hallucinations of Noah till now." He said, which caught Noah’s heart like a fishing hook catching its bait.
He watched Michael turn his head away and brush his cheek, fighting any form of tears from welling up in his eyes.
"Sorry, customer, I don’t mean to be rude." He said, not looking back at Noah. "But please give me a moment. I don’t think I’m in my right state of mind right now."
True. For someone who had been waiting for five good years and had passed through a series of nightly visits from an imaginative Noah, as well as seeing him cross the road, prompting him to run after him, which nearly caused him an accident, this situation felt like a hallucination once more.
It felt like a dream.
There was someone there to get flowers for their lover, but just because he had a similar build to Noah, he saw Noah in him.
’I feel so pathetic.’ Michael thought. ’Noah can’t be here. And even if he is, he wouldn’t approach with a silly line like that. I’m definitely losing my mind.’
He gripped the edge of the table, squeezing hard as he gritted his teeth.
"Why do you think you’re not in your right state of mind?" Noah asked and Michael squinted his eyes shut. Even his voice sounded so much like Noah’s.
He had played the video for several nights and days just so he wouldn’t miss a single detail when he met Noah again and that was why he was able to recognize his voice so well.
"It’s cause I’m seeing things." Michael said. "The one I’m seeing right now is... It’s not you, so I apologize if I can’t attend to you right away, but can you give me a moment? Or still... Can you please leave for now?"
He couldn’t dare to face this man who shared so much resemblance to Noah. It only hurt his heart and it... Michael froze as he caught a very familiar scent.
The man had gotten to where he was, standing right behind him and the smell of his cologne, if it was cologne, smelled so much like Michael.
"It seems I’ve caused you more pain than I could imagine." Noah said and Michael’s eyes shook. What did he say? "I didn’t mean to take this long and I... I didn’t wish for you to suffer but I’m here now. I’m here so please, let me take my suffering from you."
Michael turned around to look at him, only to find a painful smile on his lips as he gazed at him with warm yet regretful eyes.
This... This wasn’t someone else. It was definitely Noah but...
He had appeared before him like this before. This wasn’t the first time so Michael could never rule out the fact that this was another hallucination.
Despite knowing that, despite knowing that as soon as he embraced this Noah, he would disappear and leave him in despair once again, he wouldn’t help himself.
Tears brimmed down his eyes like water droplets, and he cried.
He wanted to embrace Noah, even if it was just for a moment, and cry on his shoulder.
Noah had no idea that these were the thoughts going through Michael’s mind. But whatever was going through his mind, it wouldn’t matter because he would make sure to prove himself with his presence.
"Noah," Michael called, and then Noah pulled him in, wrapping his arms around his waist.
"Words can definitely not describe the feelings I am feeling right now, and no matter how much I try to sugarcoat them, it wouldn’t mean much in the face of action, right?" He said, gazing into Michael’s teary eyes. "So, I will prove myself to you once more, Michael. I’ll prove that my love is still as strong as ever and I... I’m the one standing in front of you."
With that, he pulled Michael’s chin up and kissed his lips.
