The First Patriarch: Streaming My Cosmic Harem

Chapter 30: Chapter 30: He Actually Asked Her Age?

The chat feed detonated into a flashing wall of neon brilliance, the text flying so fast it threatened to tear right through his peripheral vision.

[Lusty_Sera] (Golden): My darling is back! But why are you injured, Az~

[Goddess_of_the_West] (Golden): HE’S BACK! The audacious little worm actually went live again!

[Crimson_Fury] (White): HA! Look at his face! The arrogant "Patriarch" is bleeding! Did the Duchess finally decide to put the dog down?!

[Pure_Lotus_Deity] (White): Serves him right. Let’s see if his mouth stays that cocky when he’s being broken.

[ThoughtAngel_404] (Red): Fascinating. He is really good, capitalizing on the hype. I told you all he had potential.

Azriel’s gaze calmly swept over the names.

The one who had single-handedly pushed him to the top of the trending page was obviously front and center: the golden goddess, Goddess_of_the_West.

The exact second he hit the go-live button, she had received an instant high-priority notification, a premium perk of both subscribing to his channel and immediately purchasing his top-tier membership.

She was clearly sitting there with a cosmic notepad, planning an extensive, microscopic study of his downfall just to crush his ego in her next reaction video.

Looking past her, Azriel noticed that several other familiar faces from his debut stream had also safely returned to their seats.

He smirked internally as his eyes locked onto Crimson_Fury’s exceptionally bitter comment.

Right below that, he recognized the red-lettered angel, ThoughtAngel_404, who was proving to be one of his most perceptive viewers, readily appreciating his ruthless, content-driven grind.

Slowly, Azriel wiped the trail of fresh crimson blood from his lip with the back of his hand.

He did it deliberately, making sure the floating, invisible camera drone caught the raw, agonizing reality of his situation in high definition.

He didn’t open his mouth, nor did he vibrate a single vocal cord in the physical world.

Instead, utilizing his newly integrated Mental Stream Link skill, he seamlessly bridged his consciousness directly into the broadcast matrix.

His smooth, unbothered, and entirely unfiltered thoughts carried straight over the platform’s audio stream.

’What’s up, bitches,’ Azriel communicated mentally, a strained but undeniably cocky chuckle undercutting his internal voice.

’Missed me?’

The moment his arrogant, mocking voice echoed through their speakers, the chat went into an absolute, unhinged meltdown.

A massive torrent of creative curses, shocked capital letters, and toxic insults from the returning goddesses rolled by so fast the text became a blinding neon blur.

[Crimson_Fury] (White): WHO ARE YOU CALLING A BITCH?! You’re on your knees bleeding, and you still have the nerve to talk down to us?!

[Goddess_of_the_West] (Golden): The audacity! He literally just got blasted into a wall and he’s flirting with the audience! Someone mute this man!

[Lusty_Sera] (Golden): Oh, the casual disrespect while looking that broken... the absolute audacity. It’s intoxicating.

[Moon_Priestess_99] (Cyan): Hi Azriel, I was...wait, why are you bleeding?! Take this...

Ding!

[Moon_Priestess_99 (Cyan) has sent a gift: ’Chariot of Dawn’ (Value: 500 KP)!]

Instantly, the entire stream screen was taken over by a lavish, glowing animation.

A miniature golden chariot, pulled by magnificent winged horses made of pure solar light, dashed across the bottom of the interface, leaving a glittering trail of stardust in its wake.

It was a high-tier gift notice that screamed premium clout.

[Moon_Priestess_99] (Cyan): Buy something from the shop to heal yourself right now, blood doesn’t look good on you!

[Crimson_Fury] (White): Ugh, the simp has arrived.

Ding!

[Crimson_Fury has sent a gift: ’Rotten Tomato’ (Value: 1 KP)!]

Right on cue, a cheap, pixelated tomato violently flew across the screen and splashed right over the lens, leaving a messy, dripping red animation that temporarily obscured the view.

It was a petty, low-tier insult of a gift, designed specifically to ruin the broadcast’s aesthetic.

Azriel watched the net Karma Points tick directly into his system balance, a victorious thrill cutting right through the stinging agony in his abdomen.

He wasn’t bothered by the digital splat in the slightest, after all, to a seasoned social media manager, a gift was a gift, and hate-clicks spent just as well as love.

’Thank you for the gift, Moon,’ Azriel thought smoothly, utilizing the Mental Stream Link to let his internal voice carry a warm, deeply loving drawl over the broadcast audio feed.

’You are far too sweet to me.’

Then, his mental tone instantly flipped into a sharp, mocking grin directed right at the white-colored text.

’And fuck you, Crimson bitch.’

"Are you done muttering to yourself on the floor, or do I need to help you up with another strike?"

The illusion of his private broadcast shattered instantly.

Rosalind’s icy voice cut through the cavernous training ground like a razor.

She stepped forward, her pristine white combat boots clicking sharply against the dark volcanic stone.

Her golden eyes were completely stripped of the playful warmth they had held back in the library.

Right now, she was a GrandMaster-stage awakener looking down at a baseline novice.

Hearing the sharp, domineering voice of his master, and current partner, the audience’s attention instantly snapped away from his insults and back to the unfolding drama.

The chaotic energy in the chat shifted from outrage to pure, unadulterated excitement as thousands of goddesses realized the context of the stream.

[Lusty_Sera] (Golden): Wait, is the Duchess actually going to discipline him live?!

[Crimson_Fury] (White): Yes! Break him! But wait, why did she punch him in the first place? What did the worm do?

[Goddess_of_the_West] (Golden): Look at her aura. She is absolutely furious. What could an just awakened mortal possibly have done to provoke a GrandMaster’s wrath like that?

The chat was a frenzied blur of questions, the higher entities practically vibrating with anticipation to know what grand transgression the "First Patriarch" had committed.

Azriel didn’t have the time or the breath to give a lengthy explanation with Rosalind looming over him like a storm cloud.

Utilizing his Mental Stream Link, he casually tossed a single line of thought into the broadcast audio feed.

’Actually... I just asked her what her age was.’

The chat feed stopped dead for a fraction of a second.

Then, it exploded in a manner that completely eclipsed his previous records.

The goddesses across the dimensions were utterly dumbfounded.

[Pure_Lotus_Deity] (White): He... he asked a woman her age? Is he suicidal?!

[Goddess_of_the_West] (Golden): Pfft—! Ahahaha! A mortal man, a slave no less, casually asking a high noble GrandMaster how old she is?! He isn’t just an idiot, he completely lacks a brain!

[Crimson_Fury] (White): I take it back, he’s not arrogant, he’s just a complete and utter idiot! A single punch was mercy, you fragile fool!

[ThoughtAngel_404] (Red): Truly, a man seeking an early grave.

[Lusty_Sera] (Golden): I think I get what happened...