The Canary that couldn't escape

Chapter 856: Chapter 857 The Everlasting Nightmare 3

"I really hate myself. It was my playful nature that hurt them... I can never forgive myself. For the two years after their death, I had nightmares every day, couldn’t sleep at night, and became more and more withdrawn, too reluctant to say a word..."

"Later, on the anniversary of my parents’ death, I mustered up the courage to come here, to confess my regret and pain to them.

And then I could feel them smiling at me, gently comforting me by my side."

"The next morning, my mood would be much lighter... So, every year on this day, I come here to confess my faults, hoping to ease my mind..."

"Ran, I’m not telling you this to gain your sympathy.

I just need someone to listen. Over these years, it’s been so hard keeping this secret to myself. If I don’t speak out, I won’t be able to bear it; I’ll just keep repressing myself until one day I’ll completely break down..."

Fujiwara Ize smiled faintly, looking very relaxed, "Now that I’ve finally shared my deepest secret with someone, I suddenly feel much lighter inside."

"..." Mo Ran leaned against the wall, not answering.

She didn’t feel much about what Fujiwara Ize told her, except that he seemed a bit pitiful.

He was better off than Gu Yixuan, having parents who loved him dearly, but he personally destroyed that happiness.

"Ran, do you know why I have to have you?" Fujiwara Ize asked suddenly.

Mo Ran’s eyes flickered slightly, waiting for him to continue.

"Because both Gu Yixuan and I are people who can’t attain happiness. I had happiness, but I couldn’t keep it. He never had happiness to begin with.

We are both pitiful souls, appearing strong on the outside, but with no warmth inside."

"I like you, actually it’s because I like the love you have for Gu Yixuan.

I think, if you loved me like you love him, wouldn’t I be happy and feel warmth in my heart?"

"You would never know how much I crave a ray of sunlight. For the happiness that others obtain so easily, I yearn so desperately, but I have never had."

"So, I need to hold onto you. I want happiness and warmth, and I am willing to sacrifice anything for that.

As long as... I can once more feel that sense of happiness, I don’t care what I have to do..."