Chapter 1519: After Story: [IF] Getting Advice From Love Experts! [Part 1]
(Disclaimer: This is an IF Chapter, which means that it can, or can’t happen in the current time line.)
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Somewhere in the majestic forest of Solterra lay the ancestral home of one of the most unique birds in the world.
Birds who weren’t particularly pleasing to the eyes and ears yet still coveted by many people in the past.
Their popularity had further skyrocketed, especially after Zion Leventis was seen with him all the time.
These birds were none other than the Pocopocos, which people often refer to as the Ugly Parrots.
Regardless of their looks, many people wanted to capture these birds and make them pets. That way, they would have something in common with the young man who saved their world.
And right now, two people had entered their forest, hoping to get some advice on a very important matter.
Dantanian and Percieval (AKA Taiga), had traveled far to talk to Vassago, the first Pocopoco that traveled alongside Zion during his First Wandering.
He was now the King of Pocopocos, so he had been incredibly busy recently. Their home had received a surge of visitors invading his domain, hoping to capture a few of his kind! Naturally, he spit at every single one of them.
The moment Dantanian and Percival entered the forest, they immediately saw two Pocopocos perched on a tree branch, looking down on them with amusement.
A moment later, the sound of humming reached their ears.
More Pocopocos made their appearance, and they started to produce sounds, which melded together to form a harmony.
"In the jungle the mighty jungle... two idiots came tonight," one of the birds sang. "In the jungle, the quiet jungle, two fools will cry tonight~"
A moment later, all the birds joined the singing.
"A-weema-weh, a-weema-weh!
A-weema-weh, a-weema-weh!
A-weema-weh, a-weema-weh!
A-weema-weh, a-weema-weh!"
One bird leaned forward, picking up the next verse of the song.
"Near the forest, the sacred forest, Dantanian will trip tonight~"
"Near the forest, the shaded forest, his pride will fall tonight~"
"A-weema-weh, a-weema-weh,
A-weema-weh, a-weema-weh~"
Taiga suddenly burst out laughing, while looking at his companion with a smug look on his face.
"Look, even the ugly birds are making fun of you!" Taiga laughed.
The foolish Tigerkin had no idea that he had just made an enemy of the entire flock of Pocopocos. Who told him to call them ugly to their faces?
The birds stopped singing and glared at the annoying Tigerkin.
"Oh, look, it’s Taiga. Isn’t he that guy Shasha rejected?" one of the Pocopocos’ sneered, making sure that the Tigerkin heard its words.
"Don’t let him hear you," A Pocopoco commented loudly. "He tried to shoot for the moon, but ended up falling into a dung pile."
"Ewwww! No wonder it suddenly got smelly when he entered this jungle."
"Hey, did your mom ever tell you to wash your face after dunking it in poop? Where are your manners, you stupid Tigerkin?"
This time, it was Dantanian’s turn to laugh. The birds were already funny, but seeing Taiga’s face contorted in anger made him laugh more.
"Awwww, look at his butthurt expression!" a Pocopoco pointed at Taiga using its wings. "Don’t worry, Taiga, my boy. One day, you will find the right girl for you."
"What? Does that person even exist?!" a Pocopoco gasped.
"Of course not!" the Pocopoco answered. "But don’t tell him that, okay?!"
The Pocopocos then started laughing, their laughter grating on Taiga’s ears. The Tigerkin roared loudly, wanting to shut them all up!
His roar had indeed been effective since the birds stopped laughing.
However, three seconds later, they started laughing once more.
"Okay everyone, that’s enough."
A dignified voice quieted everyone down, making all the Pocopocos look up at the descending bird that landed on the highest tree in the forest.
This Pocopoco was none other than their King, Vassago.
Poca also landed beside her husband, looking at the two guests that had traveled far to reach their territory.
"Well then, why did the two of you travel here?" Vassago asked. "I’m sure Zion didn’t ask you to come here to see me, right? Usually when he wants to meet me, he just teleports right beside me."
Taiga glanced at Dantanian, who gave him an encouraging nod.
"I came here to ask for advice," Taiga replied. "Advice on love."
"You came to the right place!" one of the Pocopocos patted their chest with confidence. "Pocopocos are experts when it comes to giving love advice!"
"That’s right!"
"We’re the best!"
"We’ve been hooking people up since 800 BC!"
"You’re on the right path, kid. Your chances of getting a wife just rose up the moment you came to ask the experts."
Taiga blinked, feeling overwhelmed by the expectant gazes of hundreds of birds, who seemed to have gathered just to hear his love problem.
"Well then. What kind of advice do you need?" Poca asked, feeling very curious about Taiga’s lovelife.
"Well, she’s... younger than me," Taiga replied. "I’m waiting for her to come of age before I propose to her. But she has this scary brother who can slap me to the afterlife, and I don’t know how to propose without getting rejected."
Vassago nodded sagely. "I see. They say that age is just a number. What is the name of this girl?"
"She’s Zion’s sister, Remi," Taiga answered.
""What?!"" Vassago and Poca asked at the same time.
"What?!" Dantanian also gasped. He had no idea that the one Taiga was aiming for was Remi, the one whom he was also waiting to come of age!
He only accompanied the Tigerkin because they had become friends, and he looked depressed as of late.
Since it was a love problem, he decided to lend him a hand and took him to the domain of the Pocopocos, who were said to be an expert in love.
He had no idea that he had accidentally tried to help his love rival!
"Kid, of all the flavors in the world, why did you choose to be salty?" Vassago facepalmed—err face winged. "Seriously, why did you even pick Remi? Wait! Don’t answer.
"I know that you’re heartbroken about Shasha hooking up with Cranky. But suddenly shifting your love to her younger sister is a low move, man."
"That’s right!" Dantanian immediately jumped in to discourage his love rival. "You can’t get the older sister, so you chose the younger one instead? That’s low, bro! I was waiting for her to grow up, too!"
".... What?!" Taiga glared at Dantanian, who was unable to hold back his own desire to court Remi as well. "You bastard! You’re aiming for Remi too?!"
"Why not? All is fair in love and war!"
"Damn! I trusted you!"
The two friends glared at each other, not taking a step back.
Dantanian believed that he and Remi had a chance of being together.
Why?
Since Cranky, a Celestial, could do it, why couldn’t he?
He was a Fiend, a very good looking one as well!
In fact, he also looked so youthful that he looked like he was only in his late teens!
This was his perfect plan of becoming family with his idol, Zion. But of course, he also liked Remi very much because she was a very good girl.
"What do you even like about her?" Taiga glared at his friend, who he was considering to un-friend right at that moment!
"Remi is kind, caring, gentle, pure and..." Dantanian wasn’t able to finish whatever he was saying because the Pocopocos immediately interjected.
"And completely out of your league!" a Pocopoco cut in loudly, making several birds nod in agreement.
"And protected by a brother who treats overprotectiveness as a competitive sport!" another added.
"And raised by a family where teleportation is the least scary thing they can do!"
"And if kindness was currency, you’d still be in debt!"
"And anyone can probably smell your intentions from three realms away!"
"And most importantly," one bird said dramatically, "She has taste. The only way for you to win her heart is if you can surpass her brother, Zion!"
"OHHHH!" The entire flock reacted as if a critical hit had just landed.
Taiga and Dantanian both clutched their chest with their hands. The harsh reality hit them without mercy.
Taiga was already worried about the age difference, but Dantanian’s age difference was a league of its own.
"However, there is a saying," Vassago cut off everyone. "If there’s a will, there’s a way."
At his words, Taiga and Dantanian looked at the King of Pocopocos as if he had just given them a lifeline.
"Then, what can I do?" Taiga asked.
"Tell me what I need to do, Vassago!" Dantanian demanded.
All the Pocopocos looked at their dignified king, who seemed to have thought of a way on how to give the two hopeless fools a chance to find happiness.
The forest held its breath.
Even the Pocopocos, who normally had the attention span of a bouncing pebble, leaned forward in anticipation.
"There are three steps."
The words fell like sacred scripture, which contained all the secrets of the world.
However, for Taiga and Dantanian, who both gulped in anticipation, those three steps might just be the key for them to find the courage to take that step to the unknown.
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