Chapter 62: Murder is Illegal
I was walking through one corridor after another and realized one very important thing. My sense of direction did not improve just because I was in space. And when every inch looked the exact same, it made my life even harder. Couldn’t they have signs pointing toward the exits or even corridor names? They needed to be like malls back on Earth and at every intersection have a map with the dot saying, ’You are here.’
Hell, at this point, I would take a random rock or boulder so that I knew that I wasn’t just going around in a circle. Anything was better than the endless dark gray hallways to nowhere.
At least rats got treats throughout the mazes. Seriously, these Thuzirusians really should invest in treat dispensers and put them in random passageways. Then I wouldn’t be so hungry.
"Anyone there?" I grumbled. I was done trying to be a big girl and find my way out of this place on my own. Now it was time to call Mom and Dad to come and rescue me.
"We both are," said Sha Shou, sounding like her cheerful self. "What do you need?"
"A way back to the X94 would be nice," I pouted as I stopped walking. There was no point in going further if I couldn’t guarantee that I was even going in the right direction in the first place.
"That would be Jun Li’s jurisdiction, Dear," she continued. "But I have been looking into some really interesting things that I can program into your suit Nanos for future use. Let me tell you about them!"
"Can we wait until we get back?" I asked tiredly.
"Of course, Dear," my helmet assured me, in no way sounding upset that I asked her to hold off for now. "Jun Li? Are you able to talk to Mei Xing for a moment?"
"I was already on the line just waiting for you to stop talking," said Jun Li with a bit of snark in his voice.
"Perfect, then I will let you help her while I go back to work programming the Nanos. Oh, this is going to be so much fun!"
"Are we alone?" asked Jun Li after a second. "Good. All right, you need help getting back to the fighter?" he continued, and I could hear some typing coming through the comms. "Wait, how did you get so far out of the market territory?!?"
"If I knew, I wouldn’t be asking you for directions. And how can I be out of the market? I have not left the tunnels," I asked, confused.
"Apparently, you weren’t paying attention when you flew down to the planet," replied Jun Li with a sigh. I chose not to answer the question. The ship was being driven by Sha Shou; there was no reason for me to really be paying attention. I was more worried about the weapons I was carrying.
"The surface of Thuzirus is not suitable for habitation. So, the Thuzirusians have adapted by creating tunnels under the ground that connects all of the planet together."
"You mean I am literally in an ant hill?" I asked. I guess it was a good thing that I was not claustrophobic, or this would be very upsetting news. Wait, I wasn’t claustrophobic, right? I thought about it for a moment and felt that my desire to be out of here stemmed more from the fact that I didn’t want to be on this planet anymore rather than a fear of being buried under however much dirt was currently on top of me.
I was going with that.
"I just had to look up what an ant hill is, and yes, you are correct in your thinking."
"Great, nice to know. Could you tell me which way to go from here? Straight, back, left, or right?" I was currently standing in the middle of a four-way intersection and had once again managed to get myself turned around so that I couldn’t even tell which way I had come.
"Give me a second," said Jun Li as once again he went back to tapping on his computer. "Head North 500 meters."
I stood there and blinked a few times, trying to calm myself down. Something that I never thought I would have to say in my life. I was supposed to be a high-functioning psychopath, incapable of being easily angered.
Then again, even a psychopath could become angry in some circumstances. They usually ended up committing murder, but they were capable of anger.
Wait, I actually committed murder before I became angry, so maybe this anger is a byproduct of the murder and not my need to reach through my comms and strangle my AI.
"Jun Li," I said slowly and softly. "I have no idea which way is North. Could you please be a bit more... colloquial in your explanation and dumb it down a bit?"
"Go straight until you get to your fifth intersection," said Jun Li slowly. "Are you okay?"
"No, I am not," I answered with a smile on my face. "I am lost, I am hungry, and I just want to kill the next person who I come across."
"Have you tried gardening?" asked Jun Li, seemingly out of the blue.
"Can’t say I have," I said with yet another sigh. I just went through the first intersection and on my way to the second.
"There is a sign I want to buy you, but if you don’t garden, then it is pointless." This entire conversation was pointless, but I wasn’t going to tell him that. It was almost nice talking to someone.
"How would we even get the sign?" I asked. Through the second, hopefully, I didn’t know my math, and the fifth intersection came up right after the second one.
"I might be able to have it custom-made," said Jun Li, like it wasn’t that big of a deal.
"Well, what does it say? And then I can tell you if you should get it made or not," I said as I made it to the third intersection. Just my luck that five didn’t come after two.
"It is a picture of a human female with plants all around her, and it reads, "I garden because murder is illegal. Save a life, send mulch."
