Chapter 59: She Who Laughs Last, Laughs Best
I chuckled at his remark, completely unconcerned about what he might have up his nonexistent sleeve. "I have narrowed it down to one of three possibilities," I said, looking at the little green man. "You have called someone to come and help you contain me. This can be so you can either send me to the slave market here, sell me to a private bidder, or use me as leverage. The individual is probably a friend looking to make some easy money; however, you are smart, right?"
"That means that the change for the first scenario is not possible. You would want to flaunt that you have a universal breeder in your grasp, advertise it and bring out the individuals with the most amount of money. After all, I am not cheap."
"You are desperately trying not to say people, aren’t you?" chuckled the alien across the table from me as he, too, leaned back in his chair.
"I really am," I admitted with a nod.
"So, do you think it is that one?" he asked.
"No, there is no way you can do that type of advertising and not have me alerted to it. Besides, there is no way that you could have known that I was going to be here, so there was no way to plan in advance. Was it my exceptionally good manners that alerted you that I was human?"
"It was," he admitted with a nod of his own. "No one is ever that polite unless they are a politician or someone trying to get their way. You were too smooth for the latter, and a politician would never hide their face."
"All things to keep in mind for next time, I guess," I said with a shrug as the door opened, revealing several guards swarming the small house.
"Did you see this coming?" he asked with a scoff.
"I did," I reassured him. "It was my second scenario. If you weren’t keeping me for your own profit, then you were doing it for someone else. We call those ass-kissers or brown-nosers where I come. And here I thought you were smart."
"You are trying to get me mad, and that is just not possible," he reassured me.
"I am female. It is exceptionally easy for me to piss someone off," I replied with a low laugh. "Now, if you are doing this for someone else, then you are the idiot in the first scenario that was only looking for an easy profit."
"You are showing a definite lack of fear," said the little green man, not holding a weapon of some kind to me. "But you are very ... what’s your Earth word for it? Narcissistic."
"Well, I don’t want to brag, but I am the one that is currently being held prisoner in your kitchen. Unless, of course, you think you are going to be able to get your hands on my ship. But you aren’t that dumb, are you?" I chuckled in satisfaction.
"Jun Li," I said out loud, staring at the alien. "Have you had any visitors lately?"
"I have," said Jun Li, activating the external speaker attached to my crown. "I just sent them back into space. Did you want them back?"
"And just how many are alive?" I asked, not once breaking eye contact. There was a loud sound of a laser firing before Jun Li came back.
"There was one still struggling. I fixed that, don’t worry."
"You’re the greatest," I said with a smirk on my face. "Make sure everything is cleaned up before I get back."
"Sha Shou is already doing that." His response made me pause, and I was more than a little glad that no one could see the confusion on my face. How the hell could my helmet be cleaning dead bodies from the ship? Never mind, I would worry about that when I get back.
"Merciless?" he asked me out loud.
"Yes?" I answered. I guess my name in this persona was going to be Merciless. As long as Jun Li didn’t mind that I took his, I didn’t really care.
"Try not to track too much blood into the runner. It’s a bitch to get out."
"Understood," I replied with a chuckle. "I don’t know if you have spent any time on Earth," I said. "But we have a phrase that I think will apply to this situation."
"And what is that?" asked the little green man as he looked over at the armed guards.
"She who laughs last laughs best."
As soon as I said the last word, I dove to the side, narrowly missing the laser beam. Getting to my feet as gracefully as I could in 5-inch heels, I smiled at the being that fired the first shot.
"On my planet, if someone attacks you first, then anything that you do to them in return is considered to be self-defense. Is that the same here?"
"We have no rules here," said the guard with the gun. I mean, I could only assume he was a guard as he was wearing the same suit that the first Thuzirusian was wearing. How did they even differentiate between them? Or can anyone pick up a gun and start shooting?
Then again, no rules, so maybe that was completely possible.
I watched as the second shot was aimed at my head. I didn’t bother to duck. I didn’t know if it was because I was stupid or just crazy, but I felt that this was as good of a time as any to see if my passive weapon worked.
When the shot ricocheted off me and straight to the shooter, I finally understood how something could be both passive and a weapon.
"That looks like it has to hurt. Are you sure you don’t want to check on him?" I asked the little green man next to the one that was clearly dead. There was a giant grey hole in the middle of his massive forehead that was still smoking.
Yeah, I could get used to this.
