Chapter 9: my sex lessons
"When I first saw you I had to have you," he whispered against my breast. "It was something about your presence. Those sexy pouty lips, your beautiful breasts, that ass had me hard within seconds. I am so hard for you right now you have no idea."
I want you to know those words went directly to my core and set up permanent residence there without asking permission.
His fingers traced the indention of my sex slowly, grazing my mound with a gentleness that made me want to grab him and tell him to stop being so careful with me. He came closer and kissed me, a simple closed mouth kiss at first, until we both felt that spark and my arms went around his neck without consulting my brain first. The kiss deepened. His tongue asked for entrance and I gave it immediately and without hesitation. His hand cupped my sex and my breathing went shallow as he sucked on my tongue. His palm massaged me slowly while his fingers began their own seductive dance and I already knew I was not going to last much longer at all.
He still had his jeans on. That was a problem I fully intended to solve.
As he pulled away I grabbed his waist before he could go anywhere. He stopped. I leaned forward, my hair wild and completely beyond saving at this point, and I unbuckled his belt. Then the snap. Then the zipper, slowly, while looking up at him and watching his breathing change with every single inch. I licked my lips. His eyes told me everything I needed to know about what this night was going to mean to both of us.
He kissed along the crease of my neck and my body lifted toward him begging for more without my instruction. I pulled him down onto me and used my feet to push his jeans and underwear to the floor. He removed my shoes with quiet efficiency. Then he laid down right beside me.
"Close your eyes," he whispered.
I did as he asked without a moment of hesitation.
His fingertips grazed my skin from top to bottom and when he reached my sex he formed a V with his fingers, spread my lower lips and framed my pearl while his mouth found my breast simultaneously. My hand trembled as I grabbed his hair. I guided him. I moved my body to the rhythm of his tongue and stopped pretending I was anything other than a woman who was thoroughly and completely enjoying herself.
"Oh God please don’t stop. It feels so good," I managed, and meant every single syllable of it.
His fingers stroked me while his mouth worked and I felt my walls tighten before I could prepare for it. My body convulsed off the bed. I grabbed the sheets with both fists. My eyes squeezed shut so tight that tears ran down the sides of my face. When I opened them he was still between my legs, finger running slow deliberate circles on my pearl, looking at me like he had nowhere else in the entire world he would rather be and no interest in being anywhere else.
"Damn, you taste delicious," he said, licking his fingers slowly and without any apology about it. "I cannot wait to have you wrapped around me."
I eased off the bed and crawled up onto him. I want you to know I was improvising completely and sincerely hoping it looked intentional. I licked my tongue down his bare chest, massaged his nipples with my fingers, kissed back up to his neck and sucked on it softly. Then I worked my way back down, following the thin hairy trail that led me directly to what I can only describe as a very significant situation.
I grabbed him gently in my fist and swallowed hard. I was already rethinking the entire plan. Maybe I should have chosen someone a little smaller. Maybe I had made a grave and enthusiastic miscalculation.
He must have felt me hesitate because he started to say something.
"You are doing fine. You don’t have to..."
Before he could finish that sentence my mouth covered the head and he gasped and his head rolled back and he grabbed my hair and the sheets simultaneously like a man holding on for his actual life.
"Good gracious baby your mouth is so warm," he said. "Shit!"
His thick head moved back and forth as I tried to take him deeper. This was only my second time doing this and I was genuinely terrified I was getting it wrong. He guided me gently along his length, never forcing, just stroking my hair and the side of my face like I was something precious he wanted to take care of.
"If you could only see yourself right now," he said quietly. "You look so incredibly hot."
His speed increased and I felt the urge to gag but the sensation of everything happening at once had me getting hot all over again in a completely different way. I was on my knees looking up at him when he eased out carefully.
"You are so beautiful Cadence," he said, looking down at me with something real in his expression. "All I want is to give you the kind of pleasure you deserve. It does not matter how many men you are with after tonight. No one will make you feel the way I can."
I turned my head to the side. This man had me completely and he probably knew it. His words and his hands and the particular way he looked at me had quietly dismantled every wall I had carefully and painstakingly constructed over twenty one years.
He rubbed my cheek with the back of his hand and I leaned into it without thinking.
"Come here," he said softly.
He picked me up and kissed me. I was worried he had not gotten enough so I released and made my way back down. Was I becoming addicted to this? Every single time I had judged someone for exactly this feeling I had been completely wrong and I owed several people a very sincere and personal apology. But right now I did not care about any of that. I was enjoying myself and that feeling was new and it was mine and I was absolutely keeping it.
I worked my mouth and my hand in tandem, taking him a little deeper each time, feeling him almost growling underneath me with something that sounded like barely contained restraint. I felt warm liquid hit the back of my throat. I eased up slightly, tasting him, and the knowledge that I had caused that reaction in him gave me a freedom I had never felt before in my life. I wiped my mouth and moved back toward him.
"You are so perfect," he said, his voice low and genuine. "I do not want to let you go."
"Then don’t," I said, meaning every single word from somewhere deep and honest. "I want you. I want you so badly."
He laid me back gently and kissed me, working his lips along my neck until he reached my nipples. He sucked and blew cool air on the wet skin and my whole body responded the way it always did with him, like it had been waiting specifically for his touch. Then he worked his way down to my mound and I moaned as the first finger entered me slowly.
"You are so wet baby," he said with quiet satisfaction.
I was very aware. He had been doing wicked and deliberate things to my body for the better part of an hour and my body had been keeping meticulous notes on every single moment of it. He inserted a second finger and the pleasure of it made me grip the sheets all over again like they were the only thing keeping me tethered to the planet.
"How does that feel?" he asked carefully. "Am I hurting you?"
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