Chapter 452: Chapter 452 - Cherished Memories(Part 5)
"H-hey, come on, don’t cry, it’s not-...," I began.
"Sh-shut up, I’m...I’m not crying!" Shot back Lumena, as tears streamed down her face.
"Uh...sure, if you say so," I smiled, as I patted her head.
She then stepped forward and wrapped her arms around me, burying her face in my chest.
"I don’t want you to go...I don’t want to say goodbye. Not now, not ever..."
Yeah...that just about sums up how I feel about this. I really didn’t expect so many heartfelt, emotional reactions though...I’m honestly touched, but on the flipside, it’s making this so much harder.
"Hey, chin up...you’ve been through some really painful and traumatizing shit, this is nothing compared to that. So-...," I began, in an effort to cheer her up.
"No...don’t tell me how to feel about this. Yeah, I had a fucked up past that still haunts me...but the main reason why those experiences are a thing of the past is you. Not only did you free me, but you also gave me a place to call home. You can’t even begin to imagine how much that meant to me...how grateful I am to you.
I was a slave, and now, I’m in charge of creating Magic Items for an entire nation. I get praised and appreciated constantly, so many people rely on me. You’re the one who gave me all that, you have no idea just how much you mean to me. So, don’t you dare say that losing you is nothing...because to me, I feel like I’m losing everything!" She snapped with tears in her eyes, my chest tightening as she met my gaze.
I’ve never seen her like this, it’s honestly heartbreaking. Damn it...why did it have to come to this?
I never wanted much, my only real desire was to live a peaceful life. Was that really too much to ask for?
It seemed so far out of reach for so long, and then, when it finally looked like it was within my grasp...it slipped away.
No, I don’t have time to wallow...my time in this world is running out, and I want every last second I’ve got left with the people I’ve come to cherish.
Wherever I end up after this, I’ll have all the time in the world to wallow and cry my heart out. I have to make the most of my remaining time here while I still can...no matter what, I know I’ll have regrets in the end.
If only I’d managed to avoid the Balancer’s grasp at the very end, this wouldn’t be happening. I wouldn’t have died, and I’d still be able to continue living in this world.
I didn’t get careless or let my guard down, I know I didn’t, the exhaustion just prevented me from reacting as fast as I’d normally be able to...and that’s all it took.
A split second was the difference between life and death, and I failed to avoid death. No matter how I try to rationalize it, I know that I’ll regret that for the rest of my existence.
But at the very least, I’d like to minimize those regrets. And the only way to do that is to make full use of my remaining time in this world, at least get some closure before time runs out.
Damn it...
"Hey, look at me...I’ll be gone before much longer, that much is inevitable. But you won’t be alone...like you said, there are a ton of people here who appreciate and rely on you. You’ll never be alone again. You know, Arcadia is my proudest achievement in this world...a nation where I could live peacefully, surrounded by people I love and trust. There was nothing more I could ask for, it was all I ever wanted.
This nation will go down as my legacy, it’ll serve as proof that I existed in this world. And you, and everyone else I formed connections with, will carry forward the memory of me. Honestly, wherever I end up next, I’m going to be pretty fucking miserable to have lost all this...I don’t know how long it’ll take to get over it, if ever. The one thing that’ll keep me from complete and utter despair is the faith I’ll have that all of you will be alright.
As things stand now, there’s nothing or no one who could even think of threatening Arcadia...and I’ll be counting on all of you to keep it that way. Your role in that is especially important...with your amazing Magic Items, this nation will have defenses like no other. Turn it into an absolute utopia, a place where anyone and everyone can co-exist peacefully. Think you can do that for me?" I inquired with a smile.
"I-...yeah. Okay...I’ll do my best, I won’t let all your hard work go to waste. I just...I just wish you could be here to see that. And, also...I’m probably going to need a few days to cry and sulk after you’re gone," She smiled back tearfully.
"I’m gonna miss you, you know. I always had a great time being around you, Lumena, I really appreciated your dirty mouth and snarky remarks," I grinned as I patted her head.
"I...I’m gonna miss you too, Larrk. Way more than I can ever put into words. I already regret not spending every second of free time I had with you, I...I guess it took it for granted that you’d be around forever. And realizing that, just makes this so much harder."
"Yeah...I know what you mean. I wish I’d made better use of my time, I wouldn’t waste a single second if I had the chance to go back and do it all over again."
"I also need to say this...I love you, Larrk. I love you so fucking much that I can’t bear it...," She trailed off in a low whisper, as she cupped my face with her hands and stood up on her tiptoes, closing her eyes as she pressed her lips against mine...
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