Chapter 333: Letting Go
Violet
Since I was a Lycan, and there were two mates involved, rejecting one would not lead to any physical pain or rejection sickness.
Zephyr had revealed this astonishing information at some point a few days ago.
But it still made me hesitate.
Even if one would not suffer the physical agony that normal rejections caused, there was still the heartbreak they would feel.
What I would feel...
I pressed my palms together in my lap, feeling the faint pulse of both bonds in my chest.
After today, one of them would go silent.
I had been carrying this decision for weeks, even if I hadn’t been entirely honest with myself.
[ - ]
I managed to find him speaking with one of Voya’s attendants. He looked tired. I was tired too, and even wondered if now would be a good time.
But dragging this on would make no sense for anyone.
The weeks of negotiations had worn on everyone, but Kael carried exhaustion the way he carried everything else. Silently, buried beneath composure and discipline.
He noticed me before I reached him. His eyes found mine, and I watched them soften in that way they only did for me.
It made my chest hurt.
He dismissed the attendant with a nod and turned his full attention to me.
"Could we walk?" I asked him.
He studied my face for a moment. A flicker of awareness passed through his eyes.
"Yes."
We made our way outside in silence.
The tree line behind the castle was quiet. The frost had receded further over the past weeks, exposing dark earth and patches of the blue-green grass that was native to this place.
We didn’t speak for a while. Even the sound of our footsteps crunching softly on the frozen ground barely did anything to quell the unease in my chest.
I kept my hands clasped in front of me to stop them from shaking.
"You don’t have to search for the right words," Kael said quietly.
I faltered mid-step.
He kept walking, his gaze fixed ahead. "I can feel it through the bond, Violet. I have felt it for weeks."
My throat tightened.
"I kept telling myself I was imagining it," he continued. His voice was calm, measured, the way it always was when he was holding himself together. But... "That you were just tired, or overwhelmed, or that the distance was about the negotiations and nothing else."
He stopped walking and turned to face me.
"But I wasn’t imagining it."
I looked at him. At the face I had grown to care for deeply over months that felt like a lifetime. Amongst other discomforts I had been battling with. The intense eyes that had once terrified me and later made me feel safer than I had ever felt. The mouth that had kissed me like I was the only solid ground in his entire world.
"No," I whispered. "You weren’t."
The silence between us stretched thin.
"I am so grateful to you, Kael." My voice came out smaller than I wanted. "For everything. You gave me a home when I had nothing. You helped me understand myself... what I was. I am not even sure I would have survived if not for you."
I most likely might not have when he found me when I had been on the brink of death.
This felt like I was being so ungrateful...
His eyes saddened.
This time, he wasn’t even trying to hide it.
"I care about you," I continued. "So much. And I wish—" My voice cracked and I had to stop, pressing my lips together until I could trust them again. "I wish I could give you the answer you deserve. The one you have been waiting for."
"But you can’t."
"No... I have chosen him."
The words left my mouth and the air between us changed. It wasn’t dramatic. Neither did it have any visible shift, but I felt the bond between us tremble, as if it too understood what was coming.
Kael was still.
His eyes held mine, and I watched as the confirmation of what he already knew settled into the lines of his face.
Then his eyes glistened.
A single tear traced down his cheek.
My heart slowly shattered.
In all the months I had known Kael, I had never seen Kael cry. Not once. Not even close.
And now a tear was sliding down the face of the most composed, most controlled, most fiercely proud man I had ever met.
I couldn’t breathe.
He wiped it away immediately, his hand quick and rough, erasing the evidence like it offended him.
"Kael, I—"
"It is fine."
His voice was hoarse but firm.
He stepped forward and took both my hands in his. His palms were warm against my frozen fingers, and I could feel them shaking. The tremor was slight, barely visible, but through his grip it was undeniable.
He held my hands between us, his eyes fixed on them.
He was no longer staring at me, just my hands.
"I understand," he said quietly. "Even so, Violet... I still do not regret meeting you. Not for a moment."
"Kael..."
He shook his head slowly. "There are decisions I wish I had made differently. If I had, things might have been vastly different. It would have."
"Kael..." I whispered, my eyes burning. "Don’t say that. Nothing is your fault."
He shook his head again, his hold on my hands tightening as he lifted them to his face. He pressed my knuckles against his cheek, my fingers against his jaw, and he held them there.
I could feel the warmth of his skin. The faint stubble rough against my knuckles. The steady thrum of his pulse beneath my fingertips.
"You don’t have to say anything else," he murmured against my hands. "I understand."
He closed his eyes and breathed in through my fingers, drawing my scent into his lungs like he was memorizing it. Like he was storing it away in a place where he could find it later, when the absence became too loud.
Then he opened his eyes.
They were clear now. Dry. The tear was gone and in its place was that fierce, unwavering resolve I had seen so many times before.
But beneath it, the rawness remained.
"Do it," he said.
My lips trembled.
"Please." His voice was barely above a whisper. "Before I lose the strength to stand here."
I closed my eyes.
The words came out painfully, carrying the ancient weight of a bond being dissolved.
"I, Violet Rector, reject the mate bond between myself and Kael Stormridge."
