Chapter 467: The Cost of Living
It all made sense when I finally understood what Eleanor had been doing.
Every lesson in the kitchen, every dish she had walked me through with quiet patience , she had been teaching me the meals Lewis loved most. She had even told me once, casually, almost in passing, that after she was gone, if Lewis ever craved those flavors, I should be the one to make them. I hadn’t understood it then. Now I did. She had been passing something of herself into my hands, making sure a piece of her would remain with him long after she was gone.
She was far from perfect. But from the very beginning to the very end, every choice she made came back to him.
Every mother loves her child.
Even Jeffrey’s death had broken something in her that never healed. He had never loved her , not truly , but he had been part of her life, and with him gone, whatever dim hope she had held onto went with him. She had nothing left to hold her here.
Lewis held her body close, tears soaking into her white dress, trailing down her hair. I stood beside him in the rain and said nothing. There was nothing to say. I just stayed.
Amber appeared from a distance, holding an umbrella overhead, her eyes swollen. "Lewis, please don’t grieve like this. This was her choice. She lived her whole life for you. As long as you and Elena are happy, she had no regrets."
Lewis’s voice was hollow when he finally spoke. "Did she ever tell you what she wanted done with her remains?"
Amber’s voice cracked. "At first she wanted to be buried beside your father , so she could haunt him forever, she said." A wet, broken sound that might have been a laugh escaped her. "But she changed her mind. She wanted her ashes scattered in the ocean. She said she spent her whole life trapped. She wanted to be free in death, carried wherever the wind took her."
The words settled around us, heavy and quiet. The world had gone colorless, like the storm had leached everything out of it.
Our bonding ceremony had become a funeral. Two in one night.
Julian. Eleanor. Both gone before morning.
The rain didn’t stop.
I fell sick that night, a high fever that dragged me under into restless, shifting dreams. They came one after another , my grandmother, Ethan, Jake, Jeffrey, Eleanor , their voices soft and overlapping, the scenes around me dissolving before I could hold onto them.
Then Wisteria appeared. She wore the same white dress from the day we first met, the one that had made her look so much like Snowflake. She didn’t speak. She only stood there, her face pale, her eyes fixed on mine with something in them I couldn’t name , not hatred, not warmth. Something unresolved and final.
In the shadows behind her stood a tall figure, face hidden. I knew him anyway. Silas. He was waiting for her. Wisteria held my gaze for one long moment, then turned and walked toward him, taking his hand, and the two of them disappeared into the dark together.
I tried to wake up and couldn’t. My eyes wouldn’t open no matter how hard I fought.
Then Julian was there. White shirt, calm, that quiet steadiness he’d had at the very end. He said my name softly. "Elena, I’m leaving."
I grabbed his shirt with both hands. "I’m sorry, Julian."
I had loved him. I had hated him. I had never wanted him to die.
He laid his hand gently on top of my head, the way you comfort someone who doesn’t need words. "Don’t carry this. Seeing you alive , that’s all I ever needed. Live well. I’ll always be watching over you." He gave me a gentle push back. "Go. Don’t come back here."
I fell, dropped into nothing, and then ,
Riley’s face was above mine, sharp with worry. "Elena, I swear if you don’t open your eyes right now, I am calling someone to pull your soul back myself."
I blinked at the ceiling. My face was wet. My throat ached. "What happened?"
"You kept calling out names. People who are gone. We couldn’t get you to wake up no matter what we tried. You were completely unreachable." She paused. "It was like something had you."
Julian’s push. That was what had brought me back. Even in whatever place that was, he had made sure I came home.
I turned my head and found the crib beside the bed. My body felt like something had wrung all the strength out of it, but I tried to sit up anyway. Riley pressed a hand to my chest. "Don’t. You still have a fever."
Kate came in carrying both babies, and without a word she settled them on the bed beside me. They rolled toward me immediately, all instinct and warmth, small and solid and completely unaware of everything that had happened. The moment I felt them against me, something in my chest finally gave way, and I couldn’t hold the tears back anymore.
They were here. They were safe. They were real.
I pulled them close and whispered it over and over against their heads. "I’m so glad you’re okay."
They babbled back at me, happy nonsense, and I held on.
After a while I asked, my voice still unsteady, "Where’s Lewis?"
"Saying his final goodbye to his mother," Riley said softly.
I wanted to go to him. This was the hardest thing he had ever carried, and I wanted to be beside him for it. But my body wouldn’t cooperate , the fever, and a mild concussion on top of it. I had survived, but I was still in pieces.
Riley wrapped her arms around me carefully, mindful of the babies between us. "Elena. You made it through."
I sat with that for a moment, turning it over. "Is it really over?" I whispered.
"It’s over," she said. "No more threats. No more danger. You’re safe now."
She meant it as comfort, and I knew that. But my heart didn’t feel the peace she was describing.
So many people had slipped away quietly to get me here.
Why did it cost so much?
