Chapter 179: She Is Not Receiving Anyone
It was stupid. Now she stood outside Theodora’s apartments, hands clasped tightly before her, trying not to look as anxious as she felt.
The guard had gone in to announce her. He returned moments later. Bella straightened. The guard bowed. "Her Grace has asked that you return to your chambers immediately. She is not receiving anyone."
Bella sighed and walked back to her chamber. She went back to Theodora’s apartments once more before supper and received the same answer. Her Grace was not receiving visitors. She tried again after supper, when the palace corridors had begun to dim.
Still the same answer.
By the third attempt, night had fallen properly over Whitehall, and Bella’s patience had gone with the sun.
Bella was done being managed. "Your Grace!" she shouted.
The guard at the door stiffened. She deserved an explanation, and she would not crawl back to her chamber like an obedient child.
"Your Grace!" she shouted again. "I need to speak with you!"
"My lady," the guard said, stepping closer, voice low with warning.
Bella turned on him so sharply he stopped. "Do not even think of touching me."
His hand froze halfway.
"Your Grace!" Bella called again. "I know you can hear me!"
The guard’s face tightened. "My lady, please—"
The door opened. The Queen Mother’s maid stepped out.
"Her Grace will attend to you now."
Bella lifted her skirt, swept past the guard and stepped into the chamber. Theodora sat on her favourite chaise, legs crossed.
"When did this insolence begin, Bella?" Theodora demanded.
Bella curtsied. "My apologies, Your Grace...It is an urgent matter. It could not wait."
Theodora regarded her from the chaise with irritation. With a lazy flick of her wrist, Theodora gestured for Bella to continue.
Bella clasped her hands before her. "I do not understand why Lady Diana left without stopping to see me after she left Your Grace’s chambers. I invited her to Whitehall. She came as my guest. I am worried something may have happened."
Theodora drew in a slow breath. "The King of England is ill...The entire palace is holding its breath, and you bother me with such trivial matters?"
Bella lowered her gaze. "I do not believe it is trivial, Your Grace. I fear both matters may be related, Your Grace."
"And why is that?"
Bella’s mouth opened. The answer sat on her tongue. If Theodora did know about Henry and Diana, Bella would not be the fool to confirm it from her own lips. She bit her lower lip and looked away. "Nothing. I only meant," Bella added carefully, "that Lady Diana’s sudden departure happened very near the time His Highness was taken ill. I wished to understand whether my friend was safe."
"Your friend. I hear you know everything about her," Theodora said. "I hear," she continued, "that you invited her into the palace. You brought a whore to the king."
"She is not a whore, Your Grace."
Theodora’s eyes sharpened. For a bit, Bella thought of apologising. Her training rose instinctively—curtsy, lower your gaze, soften your voice.
No.
She would not apologise for defending a dear friend.
"And I see she has taught you how to talk back," Theodora said. "When you came to this palace at one and six...I had great hopes for you. The king took a liking to you. Shame you were not born to a family of higher rank. You would have been perfect to be queen."
For years, words like that would have undone Bella. Now they sounded empty.
"You were gentle," Theodora went on. "Obedient. You knew your place. It is why I allowed you to carry His Majesty’s child. I thought your allegiance would be to me...I thought you would tell me everything I needed to know. Instead, you make friends with a dirty girl and let her corrupt you."
"Lady Diana is my very good friend," Bella said. "She helped me when I thought I could never smile again." Bella’s voice shook, but she kept going. "She laughed with me when everyone else wanted me quiet and easy to manage. She did not use my pain to feel better. I cannot let anything happen to her, Your Grace...And I suspect she is just as distressed as His Majesty. I only want to know why."
Bella stood her ground.
"You could not keep the king," Theodora said rising from her chaise with grace, her face lit by fury. She no longer sounded amused. What remained was naked contempt. "You could not keep a child," she continued, "and yet you stand here demanding answers from me. What gives you the right?"
The words struck Bella so hard she almost stepped back. The name did not need to be spoken for the wound to open.
She felt it all again—the emptiness, the silence, the small future that had vanished before it had properly begun. Her hand twitched toward her chest, but she forced it down.
Tears clouded her vision.
"You have no use to me," Theodora said. "No use to the king. And still you think you can parade through the halls of Whitehall with your head held high. Where was your delusion served?" Theodora asked coldly. "I should like to know."
Bella stood there, trembling, swallowing grief until it became jagged in her throat.
Theodora stepped closer, every word placed with care. "Go to your room and stay there until you finally understand that you no longer hold any value whatsoever. Bury your head in shame, as any sensible girl in your position would have done long ago."
Bella’s tears spilled then.
"Get out of my presence."
Bella curtsied. Even then. Even with her heart splitting open. Then she turned and left. The moment she stepped into the corridor, she moved quickly. She gathered her skirts in both hands and climbed.
Up one staircase. Then another. The palace blurred around her. Her heart ached but she kept going.
By the time she reached the upper gallery, her breath came in broken pulls.
(100 power stones in advance)
