Vol 2 – Chapter 22: It’s so small!
Translated by XianPiete
Madeline looked down and make a strange face as she gazed upon it. Guy looked at her and said, "What? why are you making that face, you have seen it before, right?"
Madeline smiled half-heartedly and said, "I'm sorry Guy, I shouldn't have reacted that way. It' just, after seeing Olivier's yours looks a little smaller than I remembered is all."
Guy frowned and said, "I can't help it, it was passed down through my Montfort line. Even my father has a small one like this."
Madeline smiled and said, "It's alright, I know it works the same, it's just..."
Guy frowned and said, "I can't help it if the la Marche men have bigger ones than mine, I am a Montfort you know."
Madeline reached down and touched it, "It still feels nice though, it's so hard too. I thought it would be softer."
Guy frowned and said, "Softer? Softer how?"
Madeline giggled, "Why are you so ashamed of it? You should be proud of it no matter how small it is."
"I am not concerned with its size as long as it gets the job done." Guy looked very unhappy.
Doreen walked over and reached down touching it, "Wow, it's so small! It makes you just want to reach out and touch it." She giggled.
"Why are you even here? What happened to privacy?" Guy frowned harder.
Olivier walked in and asked, "What are you guys looking at? Oh, Guy whipped his out for you to see huh? Should I whip mine out too so we can compare, Guy?"
"No! And why are all of you coming in here?" Guy grumbled unhappily.
Ella looked over and said, "Oh my, it really is tiny, they weren't joking, were they? Can I touch it too?" She reached in and ran her fingers along the edge, "Oh, it's so hard."
Guy made an uncomfortable face and then Alicia and Wolter walked in together, Wolter looked down and started to laugh, "Is that a little boy's? Do you want to see what a man's looks like?"
Alicia laughed covering her mouth, she then said, "I mean, it's not really that small, it's just, smaller than what most men would have I think."
Guy roared out, "Does anyone else have anything to say about it before I put it away?"
Claude and Algernon walked in and then Claude said, "Oh, wow that is tiny, Guy I don't know if I would be waving that thing around like this if I was you."
Guy yelled, "**** you guys, I only took it out for Madeline, why are you all even in here, give us some damn privacy you bastards!" Ella leaned down as if she was about to put it in her mouth, "Hey, don't you dare bite it!"
Ella laughed and said, "I just wanted to see if it was real is all, sheesh, you are so protective of it."
Guy bellowed, "Well, of course, I plan to have children you know!"
Sir évreux walked in and said, "This is a disgusting display, all of you. Do you have no shame? It doesn't matter how small it is... Wait, is that it? It's really tiny. Anyway, back to the point, you shouldn't act this way. We are nobles, we should all act like it. It doesn't matter how small it is, it still has the same function. If Madeline is happy with it, we should all be happy with it, right Madeline?"
Madeline sighed and said, "Actually, I was kind of thinking about how Olivier's was bigger and how that might feel better. I guess it's wrong of me as your wife to say that Guy, but I kind of want Olivier's bigger one."
Guy turned bright red and then bellowed out, "I am using this crown whether its small or not, it's a Montfort family tradition. Olivier's might be bigger, but this is the traditional Montfort crown. If I am going to become a Prince for you bastards, start treating me with a little respect damn it."
Olivier laughed and said, "You can use whichever crown you want, Guy, it doesn't have to be bigger than that."
Guy frowned and then said, "You guys are all dicks."
Doreen giggled and then said, "Oh, that reminds me, Olivier, what happened with your father, did he come around, or is he still demanding that you become the next King?"
Olivier gave his normal goofy smile and said, "He ordered his Black Knights to kill Duke Montfort and Guy here. After I explained that by doing so he would be going to war against the Council of Magic, he asked me what that was, when I explained what we were, he just didn't quite believe me. I ended up having to take him around to the places we killed enemy armies. He still didn't get it, so I just told him, that if anything happened to Guy or his family, I would personally kill him by dropping him from ten miles up in the air. He tried to call my bluff so I took a gate up there to show him." Olivier shrugged and then smiled again before saying, "He crapped his pants, I mean he actually did. It smelled awful. I don't think he is happy with me right now."
Wolter nodded and said, "I like that idea, if you use a gate like that, they still have a chance. You aren't killing them, the Earth is killing them if they don't have the luck to land softly."
Renée looked like she was going to be sick, "No one can survive that kind of fall, Wolter. You might even die from lack of air."
Wolter shrugged and said, "Isn't that just bad luck?"
Doreen made a face similar to Renée and said, "No I really think that's just a cruel death. It would take so long to fall from that height. You wouldn't be able to stop it and you would have all that time to think about it."
Guy nodded and said, "Better to just kill them outright, it's more humane."
Algernon cleared his throat and said, "I think it might be the most humane to just not kill them at all though, right? Is there a reason you need to kill them, really?"
Guy said, "Algernon if you let people who want you dead, live, they have a nasty habit of targeting not just you, but even the people you love and care about. Would you feel right knowing that you had let someone who wanted to kill you live, and they did things to Doreen, even killed her?"
Algernon shook his head and said, "I think I understand. You aren't killing them out of malice, you are killing them to prevent future deaths."
Guy smiled and nodded, "That's the unfortunate truth of this world."
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