Chapter 232 - Being With You (2)
Su Xiaofei wasn't sure if Lu Qingfeng had overheard her conversation with Song Yiran and Feng Xue'er as she wasn't aware that he'd arrived to pick her up from the library. He didn't even make any indication that he heard it.
She looked out the car's window, but her mind was somewhere else. Su Xiaofei felt that things were starting to get out of hand and unpredictable. She had long expected that her rebirth and choice to change her fate would eventually affect those around her.
Not only did Lu Qingfeng change, her mother and Ye Mingyu did as well. Su Xiaofei didn't know what to expect anymore.
"Did something happen?" She heard Lu Qingfeng asked.
Su Xiaofei pondered for a moment, wondering if she should ask for his help again, but decided not to. Lu Qingfeng had done enough to help her already, and she didn't want to abuse his kindness towards her by asking for more.
"Just heard that Ye Mingyu got a scholarship, and she'll be studying abroad." Still, she didn't dare to hide what she found out from Feng Xue'er that afternoon.
"Su Haoran is probably sending her away as a precaution. Since he was arrested and is currently being held by the authorities, Ye Mingyu's future could be compromised if she remains here." Lu Qingfeng explained.
"I see. That makes sense, then."
Su Xiaofei hadn't seen Su Haoran since the last time she met him at Chen Li's trial. However, she was aware that the cheating bastard had finally received retribution for the things he had done towards her mother.
Yun Qingrong had denied him any further financial assistance and had already cut ties with him, much to Su Xiaofei's relief. In her previous life, her mother's hesitation to leave Su Haoran was one of the reasons Su Xiaofei had argued with her. She couldn't understand why her mother had forgiven her father after he betrayed their family.
"So even a heartless person like him can still be a father to his precious daughter, huh." She chuckled amusedly.
Su Xiaofei used to envy Ye Mingyu for being doted on by Su Haoran in the past, but now that she had met Qiao Fengying, she could see that the differences between the two men were like heaven and earth.
Her real father was man enough to work hard for his family's future, while Su Haoran would rather take advantage of his wife's hard work for his own vested interest. So how can Su Xiaofei not feel proud of her birth father?
If only she had Qiao Fengying by her side when she was growing up, perhaps her standard when it comes to choosing a husband would be better, and she wouldn't have to beg for Mo Yuchen's attention.
She had begged for his love and lost her self respect because of it. Aside from that, she only felt emptiness and loneliness.
"What are you thinking?" Lu Qingfeng asked when he saw the slight smile on her face.
"Just thinking that I now know what kind of men I should avoid in the future. Men like Su Haoran and Mo Yuchen are the kind of men a woman should avoid getting involved with. But I do admit that I'm also responsible for being foolish, chasing after Mo Yuchen before. I shouldn't have done that."
Lu Qingfeng remained silent, as he pondered over her words. It was good that she didn't want to be with Mo Yuchen anymore, but he didn't want her to get traumatized and deny love because of what happened before.
"Feifei, do you know that to love someone, one would need a lot of determination and courage? It takes guts to accept someone because most people aren't ready for pain. They are afraid of heartbreak and isolation." He said after a moment of silence.
Su Xiaofei tilted her head to give him a good look. She then thought of how courageous and persistent Lu Qingfeng was for loving her despite the pain she had inflicted on him without her knowledge. She had poured her heart and effort for someone who couldn't love her and missed out on someone who was far better. It baffled her why Lu Qingfeng didn't learn to hate her because of it.
Still, she needed time to sort her feelings and she wanted to become a better version of herself. The one that Lu Qingfeng deserved. Su Xiaofei hated that she was hesitating to accept Lu Qingfeng as a result of the trauma she experienced with Mo Yuchen, even though she knew that Lu Qingfeng truly loved her.
She kept thinking that he was too good to be true, and she was expecting him to get tired of her someday. But every day, he just proved to her that he's the same person he's been from the start. Lu Qingfeng had given her no reason to question him, but it wasn't him she didn't trust,? it's everyone in the past.
Su Xiaofei lowered her gaze and rested her head on his shoulder. After experiencing such hardship in her previous life, her faith in love was shaken a bit. She didn't have the same outlook on love, and she thought she wouldn't fall in love anymore.
"Xiao Feng, don't get tired of me, okay?" She said all of a sudden, making Lu Qingfeng wonder if something else had happened while he wasn't around.
"How could that be? Regardless if I'm with you or not, I always think of you." He said in a low voice. "You won't be able to get rid of me so easily, Xiaofei."
"I'm maybe going away after graduation, but don't think that even for a moment I would forget about you. You can take the time I'm away to do whatever you need to get done. You don't need to rush yourself. If love is a learning process, I want to learn it with you."
"Sounds like a plan to me.." Her lips curled up in a satisfied smile.