"Since it had already come into this, there was no point in keeping secrets from each other anymore." Su Xiaofei said when her husband remained still and said nothing to her admission. She cleared her throat and knelt in front of him, taking in his disheveled appearance.
It hurt to know that she was the reason why Lu Qingfeng was like this again. Didn't she swear that she would change the course of his life for the better after she was reborn? Yet, a single mistake she commited had once again put him in the very situation she had sworn to avoid.
"I know, Feifei. I know. It doesn't matter because I won't let you die. Do you really think I could live knowing you're gone? Might as well tell me to die with you, because I wouldn't be able to be there for our child and that would be unfair for all of us." Lu Qingfeng said.
He would be too broken to look after the child and their baby won't just lose a mother if Su Xiaofei died, but a father, too. Lu Qingfeng would rather terminate this pregnancy than endanger his wife and put their child's life in misery.
"Brother Han said that the poison is slowly spreading, don't you understand what this means, Feifei? He's a medical genius, alright, but I won't take the risk."
"I know, which is why I will try to carry it until I'm allowed to give birth to it prematurely. The technology is far better now. If I'm lucky, I'll be able to carry it for six months and then I'll allow Brother Han to treat me. This baby is not just mine, Lu Qingfeng."
She took his hand and placed it on her lower abdomen.
"It is also yours." Su Xiaofei said, her eyes brimming with tears. "Please don't tell me you're fine with killing your own child."
"But Feifei…"
"Please." She begged this time, knowing that just like Lu Qingfeng, she couldn't relive the same nightmare all over again. "The baby is healthy, I'm not, but there must be something else we could do to keep the child."
"W-we can try again once you are in better shape." Lu Qingfeng suggested, but Su Xiaofei vehemently disagreed with him.
"We don't know that. I might not be able to get pregnant the next time."
"Feifei, please."
She shook her head.
"I'm not going to abort our baby. You can't force me to do it, ever."
"How about a surrogate? The baby would still come from us." He continued, and she could sense the despair in his tone.
"Hell no! I won't allow another woman to carry our child! No, Lu Qingfeng. Don't try to sway me to agree with you because I'm not going to."
"Fine. Adoption then."
"It's not the same." Su Xiaofei broke into tears and covered her face with both hands. "Please don't do this to me. I need your help, but you aren't helping me at all."
"Damn it, Feifeil Why can't you understand that this is the only way for you to live." Lu Qingfeng said through clenched teeth, making Su Xiaofei realize that she and her husband had never had a heated argument like this before. This was a first in their marriage.
"I'm not going to die, A-Feng. Brother Han said that he would try to find a way to save both of us." Her hand settled on her lower abdomen as tears continued streaming down her face.
Su Xiaofei needed him by her side. Why couldn't he understand that she was doing this for her own sake? The grief would kill her all over again if they forced her to abort her baby.
She was furious, but not towards him or Han Zijun, who was only concerned about her welfare. No matter how hard they beg her to do it, she wouldn't, couldn't. They had to decide whether they were going to help her in this fight or not.
She and her baby were going to survive and she had faith in Han Zijun. She genuinely believed that he would be able to find a way around it without sacrificing her baby's life.
"We don't have any choice, Feifeil. You know this."
Su Xiaofei glared at him, it hurt her to know that he was willing to give up this easily.
"No, we always have a choice. It's either you are with me on this, or we'll part ways from here!"
Both of them went still after her outburst. Both of them were caught off guard by her words. Despite uttering those words herself, Su Xiaofei almost couldn't believe that she blurted them.
"I-I didn't mean that way, A-Feng." She took his hand and kissed his palm. "I'm so sorry, I shouldn't have said those words."
—
"You are making a mistake, Feifei. This isn't just about you and the baby. Your mother and I are going to suffer if this ends up badly."
Lu Qingfeng stared at her, clenching his jaw. How was he supposed to support her if she was being like this? His whole body tensed as he tried to contain his anger. He stood up and looked at his wife with conflicted emotions.
"Sorry, Feifei. I don't think I can help you with this." He said before storming out of their room, leaving his wife in tears.
Su Xiaofei was being stubborn, and that same stubbornness would be the death of her. The only possible way to save her life was now out of the choices and Lu Qingfeng needed to think of a way to change his wife's mind and he couldn't do it while seeing her tears stained face.
Han Zijun had informed him that he was still finding another way to save both his wife and child, but the doctor reminded him that he and Su Xiaofei needed to make a decision soon.
He needed to procure a good plan that would assure her recovery and he could only hope that she would listen to him this time.
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