"Is that all? Is there something else you want to ask me then?" Lu Qingfeng asked. Since Su Xiaofei had raised the issue, wouldn't it be better if they start discussing it now?
Su Xiaofei then proceeded to relay the conversation she had with her mother about delaying having a kid for the meantime, until she and Lu Qingfeng were ready to start their own family.
"So I want to know what you think of it." She added, her eyes trained on him for his reaction.
When she married Mo Yuchen in her previous life, she had never gotten the chance to have this talk with him. She had married him, thinking that things would get better between them from then on. How stupid she was to think that it was happily ever after.
However, after their marriage, she felt more trapped and lonelier than ever. Whenever Mo Yuchen was home from work, they would always argue about trivial things and how little he spent time with her as his wife. She had ignored the red flags before their marriage, and it was only natural for her to face the consequences of her actions.
"What Aunty Qing said makes sense." Lu Qingfeng nodded, "but what about you, Feifei? Do you want to have a child in the future?"
In both of his previous lives, Su Xiaofei had lost her child and Lu Qingfeng wasn't sure if it had a lasting effect on her, regardless of the lifetime she was living. When he saw her stiffened from the corner of his eye, Lu Qingfeng then knew the answer to his question.
Su Xiaofei remained silent for a long time, as she was pondering over this question. She didn't think she would be able to bear the pain of losing another child, especially the one she would have with Lu Qingfeng in the future. It would kill her.
"You don't have to force yourself to give me an answer, Feifei." She heard Lu Qingfeng say. "I won't force you to do anything you don't want."
She gave her a weak smile at this. What had she done to deserve him?
"What about you? Do you want a kid? What if I'm not able to conceive one, just like Mama? Would you run to another woman to give you one instead?" She already knew the answers to these questions, but a part of her wanted some confirmation from him.
"I would be happy with whatever you give me. If we can't have a child, then so be it. Let's just enjoy the rest of our lives in each other's company. If we are blessed with at least one, I'll be more than happy to take care of the two of you. If you cannot conceive a child, then I would allow you to decide whether you want to adopt or not. I can pass the company to my relatives if we can't have one."
Just like what he had done in the past. Su Xiaofei thought. She couldn't remember all the details and memories she had as a ghost, but she did remember that Lu Qingfeng adopted a little boy, years after her death.
Because he wasn't willing to move on after her death, to love another woman and lead a happy life, Lu Qingfeng had chosen to adopt a child from a distant relative and raised him as his own. Still, Su Xiaofei thought that it would be better if she could give birth and give him at least one child that he could dote on.
She had no doubt that Lu Qingfeng would become a fantastic father to their child, but she couldn't say the same thing about herself. After all, the child she bore from her previous life was conceived out of her own selfishness.
It was something that she wasn't proud of and regretted doing. With Lu Qingfeng, she doubted if she even deserved to have a child of her own after all the things she had done in her past life.
"I see, then our home…"
"We can stay here as long as you want. I don't think I would be at ease knowing that Aunty Qing would be alone if we move out after our wedding." Lu Qingfeng didn't need to think twice about it because he had already decided to stay with them through thick and thin.
Her eyes stung with tears upon hearing his answer. She couldn't really leave her mother behind, especially with Yun Qingrong's current condition Yun Qingrong.
"Thank you. You don't know how much this means to me…" She wrapped her arms around him and let herself cry in his embrace. She had been trying so hard to be strong for her mother's sake, but there were times she felt like she wanted to burst into tears when she thought of the possibility of losing her mother.
The more she thought about it, the more she realized how much Lu Qingfeng had compromised and was willing to do to cater to her needs. He was sacrificing yet again for her sake, and Su Xiaofei hated that she couldn't do anything to repay any of it.
"You don't need to thank me for this, Feifei. Since I will become your husband very soon, it's normal for me to look after my wife's needs. I'm not just doing this for you, I'm also doing it for me. Let's live together with Aunty Qing and make happy memories with her." He assured her.
Lu Qingfeng was glad that she had raised this topic with him, so that he could understand her better. If he noticed a hint of hesitation on her part in marrying him, he would choose to delay their wedding to allow her some time to decide on it.
Also, he didn't want Su Xiaofei to live with regrets for the rest of her life again, once Yun Qingrong's time ended.. As for their life as a married couple, he would strive to become a good husband for her.
This 𝓬ontent is taken from fre𝒆webnove(l).𝐜𝐨𝗺