Chapter 45: I’m Sorry, Jiang Li
Chapter 45
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This all felt absurd.
Like something pulled from a distant dream—one he had never expected to have, let alone live through. The day had finally ended, and the sky above had sunk into a deeper shade of grey, heavy and unmoving.
Shen Yu stood there for a moment, staring up at it in silence. He slipped on his coat, ready to leave, when the vibration of his phone pulled him back. His gaze dropped to the screen.
Jiang Li.
Ever since that first message, it was as if the omega had grown wings—sending him something every single day without fail.
Now, the message read:
< If you don’t mind... can we meet? There’s something I want to tell you. >
< Please >
Shen Yu had been about to lock his phone, but that last word made him pause. He exhaled softly and tilted his head back, staring at the ceiling for a brief moment before looking down again.
< When and where? >
The moment he sent it, the three dots appeared almost instantly.
He raised a brow, faint amusement flickering in his eyes. It was as if Jiang Li had been staring at the chat, waiting, not daring to leave.
< The bridge... close to your workplace is fine... >
Shen Yu stared at the reply for a second before locking his phone and stepping out of his office.
He had never told Jiang Li where he worked.
Yet somehow, he knew.
That alone was enough to stir old thoughts. As Shen Yu walked, memories resurfaced—uninvited and persistent. The way Jiang Li had followed him before, how easily he had slipped into his life, stealing clothes, lying without hesitation, reshaping himself into someone else entirely.
Someone convincing.
Shen Yu frowned slightly.
What if all of this was the same?
What if Jiang Li knew exactly which strings to pull, which expressions to wear, which version of himself to present so Shen Yu would react the way he wanted?
The thought was irritating.
Because despite everything, Shen Yu couldn’t deny it—spending time with him hadn’t been as unbearable as he once believed. In fact, it had been... unexpectedly tolerable.
No—more than that.
Endearing.
The way Jiang Li loved sweet things, the way he snored without shame, the way his English broke apart in awkward, almost embarrassing ways—those small, imperfect details made him feel real.
Human.
Flawed, undeniably so, but still... sincere.
And yet—
What if that wasn’t real either?
What if even that was just another mask?
Shen Yu exhaled slowly as he reached the bridge.
From a distance, he could already see him.
Jiang Li stood near the railing, his blond hair grown out just enough for dark roots to show beneath the dye. The wind tugged at the strands, sending them shifting across his face as passing cars roared behind him. His honey-brown eyes were fixed on the river below, distant and unfocused.
There was something fragile about him.
Something heavy.
Even without sensing his pheromones—blocked completely—Shen Yu could see it in the way his shoulders slumped, as though the weight of something unseen pressed down on him.
Then, as if sensing his presence, Jiang Li turned.
Their eyes met.
And just like that, his expression broke into a soft smile—his eyes curving into crescents, though they were still wet with unshed tears.
"You came..." he said, his voice trembling.
The tears didn’t go unnoticed. Jiang Li quickly wiped at them, but Shen Yu had already seen.
A quiet breath left Shen Yu’s lips as he stepped closer. Under the dim glow of the streetlights, those honey-colored eyes shimmered.
They were beautiful.
Painfully so.
"Is my presence really that touching?" Shen Yu asked, his hands tucked into his coat pockets. "Enough to make you cry?"
Jiang Li let out a small, breathless chuckle and shook his head, looking down as if embarrassed.
But Shen Yu’s gaze followed.
His hands were shaking.
That subtle detail made something tighten in Shen Yu’s chest. A quiet instinct stirred, warning him that something wasn’t right.
Then he noticed the patches.
On Jiang Li’s neck.
One... two... more.
Layered over each other, enough to completely suppress even the faintest trace of scent.
Shen Yu’s expression shifted.
"Shen Yu..." Jiang Li began, his voice uneven, breaking under the weight of his own words. Tears slipped down again as he struggled to continue. "What would you do... if... if..."
He faltered, unable to finish.
Shen Yu didn’t interrupt. He simply watched, waiting.
Finally—
"If you got someone pregnant...?"
The words hung in the air.
Jiang Li shut his eyes tightly, as if bracing himself, as if he couldn’t bear to see Shen Yu’s reaction.
For a moment, Shen Yu didn’t understand.
The question was too sudden. Too misplaced.
Unless—
Something cold slid through him.
Fragments of memory surfaced—his rut, the doctor’s voice echoing sharply in his mind like a broken recording.
If an Alpha spends his rut with an omega, there is a 98% chance of pregnancy...
His breath caught.
No.
He was overthinking.
He had to be.
But when he looked at Jiang Li again, something in those tear-filled eyes made his chest tighten.
"I’m sorry... Shen Yu," Jiang Li whispered.
His hands trembled as he lifted something between them.
A test.
Two pink lines.
For a second, everything went silent.
Shen Yu’s heart slammed violently against his ribs as he stumbled back, his eyes widening in disbelief.
A child.
The thought alone made his chest tighten.
He had never imagined becoming a father.
Not now.
Not like this.
His mind spiraled.
He was thirty-one.
Thirty-one.
And Jiang Li—
Twenty-three.
Still young. Still standing at the beginning of everything. A future wide open before him.
A child would change that.
Restrict it.
Shen Yu’s thoughts flickered to Lin Yushen, to the way his life had nearly fallen apart, to the countless times Shen Yu had stood beside him, repeating the same words—
It will pass.
But this—
This wouldn’t just pass.
Jiang Li noticed the step back.
The disbelief.
And something inside him cracked.
His shoulders began to shake as the tears he had been holding back finally spilled over. He couldn’t stop them anymore.
If not for Luo Xin and Guo Chen pushing him to come, he would have stayed home, buried under this alone. He had delayed telling Shen Yu for so long, trying to protect himself from exactly this moment.
From this pain.
He wished he hadn’t said anything.
Because now—
Would he lose him?
He was still crying when suddenly—
Warmth.
Strong arms wrapped around him, pulling him close.
Jiang Li froze, his breath hitching sharply.
Shen Yu.
He was—
Hugging him.
The simple contact shattered something inside him. The steady warmth of the Alpha seeped into his chest, easing the ache, soothing it in a way nothing else could. His body trembled, reacting instinctively, as if it had been waiting for this.
As if it needed this.
"...I’m sorry, Jiang Li."
The words came quietly.
But they made Jiang Li go completely still.
"W-what...?"
Shen Yu’s hold tightened slightly.
"I’m sorry," he repeated, his voice unsteady, strained in a way Jiang Li had never heard before.
"I’m... so sorry, Jiang Li."
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A/ N : When I first started writing this novel, I never imagined it would receive so much love and support from all of you.
To everyone who has been reading, commenting, voting, and supporting me—thank you from the bottom of my heart. It truly means more to me than words can express.
I love you all so much! Thank you for being part of this journey with me.
(/_;)/~~ (ToT) ♡
