Chapter 22: What are you? My nanny?
"Why... Are you doing this?" Noah asked.
"It’s because someone like me doesn’t have any worth and shouldn’t be alive." Micheal said sadly. "I’m literally a curse to myself. No one will care if I die anyway so why bother? I’m just a useless waste of space. So it’ll be better for everyone, including you, if I speed up my death a bit and not spread my bad luck to you,"
"But I care!" Noah declared, causing Micheal to pause. "And I need you. Waking up without my memories was..." He shut his eyes tight, cussing himself for trying to confess this, "...hard. Not knowing where I was, who I was, or what had happened to me made me feel so paranoid, but I believe I have been trained to keep such feelings under lock in my heart, so I never showed it. The fear I feel... It’s so great that I worry that in this world where I am familiar with nothing and no one, the only person giving me shelter would also disappear, leaving me in the dark for those who are trying to kill me. As powerful as I may be... I have no confidence that I can win when I’m still trapped in oblivion. That is why I choose to be stubborn and wish for nothing bad to happen to you."
Micheal went silent, leaving Noah’s words hanging in the air.
He had literally confessed how he felt; the prideful Alpha, who had humbled himself just so he could stay in this house, was now confessing his fears. His words were heavy but sincere.
Just how much courage did he need to build up for him to confess?
But even then, Micheal’s silent response was cold. The only sounds Noah could hear were the quiet hum of the air conditioner in the room and Micheal’s heartbeat.
Finally, Micheal spoke, his voice flat and detached, like he had picked up so much momentum from the North Pole.
"Just leave me alone, Noah. I need some time to myself."
Noah’s face twisted in frustration, but he nodded reluctantly, taking two steps back from the door as he said,
"Fine. But know this, Micheal: I’m not giving up just like that. I’ll leave you be for now, but I’ll be back, and if you’re still cooped up in your room with no food in your belly, no matter what you say, I will open this door."
’What are you? My nanny?’ Micheal thought but did not respond to Noah, leaving them with yet another oppressive silence.
With a heavy sigh, Noah turned and walked away, leaving Micheal alone in his own confinement.
As Noah left, Micheal’s gaze, which had been fixed on the door, fell to the floor, his eyes slowly welling up with tears. For a moment, he allowed himself to feel the weight of Noah’s words, the concern and care that had been offered to him.
He knew quite well that Noah only cared about him because he ’needed’ him, and yet he let his words get to him.
How long has it been since someone said those words to him? How many people in this world had said those words to him?
They were not even a handful of em. He could count them with just one hand. That care and affection... Whatever motive was behind it... Felt so good to hear.
But the moment passed, and Micheal’s depressed mask slipped back into place.
He took a deep breath, wiping away his tears, and reached for the bottle of vodka he had yet to open. He was saving it for last and now...
He barely got the lid off with one hand and then poured it down his throat in haste, as if someone was chasing him for it.
The familiar burn of the alcohol that was far stronger than beer was a comforting distraction from the emotions that threatened to overwhelm him.
As the night wore on, Micheal drank more, his thoughts grew increasingly disjointed, and his memories and emotions started swirling together in a toxic stew. Toxic need.
He knew he was playing with fire, but he couldn’t seem to stop himself. And the more he drank, the more needy he became.
And in the dark room, Micheal’s secret desires waited patiently, like a predator in the shadows, ready to strike when he least expected it.
He looked towards his door, his eyelids heavy from drunkenness and his heart quivering in want, wishing to feel someone’s warmth.
Anybody at all.
It was quite late and at this time, Noah would’ve gone to sleep.
Was this the time his nightly visitor would visit? For the first time, he was looking forward to it. It was probably because of how drunk he was but... He wanted him to sink his fangs in his neck, grab him ever so gently, and seize his breath with his lips.
"Will he come? Hiccup!" He wondered out loud. "I hope so. I didn’t... Hiccup... Lock the door."
As he waited expectantly on the floor for his nightly visitor, he began to hear footsteps. The footsteps approached his room door and then his door handle clicked. Slowly, his door opened, allowing the light from the rest of the house to seep into his dark room.
It was blinding, but more than that... The handsome man standing at his door, being bathed from the back by that said blinding light,
"Ah," he exclaimed, watching with a blurry vision. "You came," his face was flushed and his breathing was hoaxed.
Noah’s sleepwalking state did well to close the door and then approach Micheal. In that dark room, his vision was sharper than ever, gazing at the man who was, for the first time, delighted to have him over.
"I was...hiccup... Expecting you." Micheal grinned widely with desire and began to stand up to his feet, but he wobbled, hardly able to step firmly on the floor, and fell back, but Noah caught his arm and pulled him to himself.
"Hah," Micheal exclaimed, feeling his firm chest against his face. "How did I manage to hold myself back till this point?" He asked and looked up at that blank expression on Noah’s face. Though it was dark, he could see clearly the hazy eyes that were proof of his unconscious moving state.
Thanks to him being a werewolf, his eyes seemed to glow in the dark.
Micheal looked at Noah’s face and then smirked.
"How did ’you’ manage to hold yourself back till this point?" Slowly, he slid his good arm around Noah’s neck and whispered in his ear. "I know you waited long, so here’s your chance. While I’m very... Hiccup... Out of it. I won’t stop you from carrying out your heart’s desire."
