Chapter 116: Chapter 115: Insatiable
DAMIEN’S POV - The Drive Home
Damien’s hands gripped the steering wheel so tightly his knuckles went white.
The car smelled like her. Like arousal and perfume and the subtle scent of her skin that drove him absolutely insane. She sat in the passenger seat, quiet and slightly disheveled despite his best efforts to make her presentable again.
Her lips were swollen. Her cheeks were flushed. There was a small mark on her collarbone where he’d sucked too hard, visible just above the collar of her blouse.
He wanted to pull over. Wanted to drag her into the back seat and finish what they’d started. Wanted to strip her completely and finally.....finally....bury himself inside her after a month of aching deprivation.
But he couldn’t. Not yet.
Because as much as his body screamed for release, as much as every instinct demanded he claim her completely....he needed to maintain control. Needed to prove to himself that this was about more than just physical need.
Even if right now it felt like he’d die if he didn’t have her soon.
"Are you okay?" Her soft voice broke through his thoughts.
"Fine."
"You’re gripping the steering wheel like you want to strangle it."
He forced himself to relax his hands. "Just thinking."
"About what?"
About bending you over the hood of this car. About how many ways I want to make you come. About whether I could make it to your apartment before I lose my mind and fuck you in this car like a teenager.
"Work," he lied.
She was quiet for a moment, then: "Damien?"
The title sent heat straight through him. "Yes?"
"Can I ask you something?"
"You can ask. I may not answer."
"How long...." She hesitated. "How long are we going to do this? The office sessions. The punishments. The...." Her voice dropped. "The claiming."
"Until I decide we’re done."
"That’s not an answer."
"It’s the only answer I have." He glanced at her. "Why? Is it too much? Do you want to use your safeword?"
"No! I just...." She twisted her hands in her lap. "I want to know what the endgame is. Are we working toward something? Or is this just.....punishment disguised as pleasure?"
Julian’s words echoed in his mind. Figure out your endgame.
"We’re working toward trust," he said carefully. "Toward me believing you won’t betray me again. Toward rebuilding what we had."
"And the sex? The dominance? Where does that fit?"
"It’s part of who I am, Aria. "I’m never going to be the man who makes sweet, gentle love and whispers poetry. That’s not who I am."
"I know. I don’t want that man. I want you." Her voice was fierce. "I just need to know....when will it be enough? When will you trust me again?"
"I don’t know," he admitted, pulling up in front of her building. "But I promise you....I’m trying. This isn’t just punishment. I’m...." He stopped, the words catching in his throat.
"You’re what?"
I’m falling for you again. I’m terrified. I’m trying to protect myself while giving you everything.
"I’m working on it," he finished lamely.
She studied his face for a long moment, then leaned over and kissed his cheek. Soft. Gentle. So different from the claiming in his office.
"Okay," she whispered. "I can wait. As long as you’re actually trying."
Then she was gone, slipping out of the car and into her building, leaving him alone with his thoughts and his painfully hard cock and the lingering scent of her arousal.
He sat there for a full minute before starting the car.
He was in so much trouble.
******
ARIA’S POV - Late Evening
Aria barely made it through the front door before her mother appeared.
"How was work?" Mei asked, her eyes sharp and knowing.
"Fine. Long." Aria dropped her bag, headed toward her room. "I’m exhausted...."
"Aria Chen. Look at me."
She turned reluctantly.
Her mother’s gaze traveled over her....the slightly wrinkled blouse, the mark on her collarbone, the flush that probably still colored her cheeks.
"He’s touching you again," Mei said. Not a question.
"Mama..."
"Don’t ’mama’ me. I can see it written all over you." She moved closer, lifted Aria’s chin. "Is this what you want? This....arrangement?"
"Yes."
"Even though he’s still punishing you? Still keeping distance?"
"He’s trying, Mama. He told me tonight....he’s working on it. On trusting me again." Aria’s voice cracked slightly. "It’s more than I deserve."
Mei’s expression softened. "Baby girl, you deserve everything. Love, trust, forgiveness. Don’t let him convince you otherwise."
"I lied to him for months. Used him. Broke his heart...."
"To save my life. Context matters." Mei cupped her face. "Yes, you made mistakes. But you’ve apologized. You’re working to earn his trust back. At some point, he needs to decide....is he going to forgive you? Or is he going to punish you forever?"
"He’s not...."
"Isn’t he?" Mei’s eyes were sad. "Using your body while keeping his heart locked away? Making you submit while refusing to be vulnerable himself? That’s punishment, baby. Even if it feels good."
Aria couldn’t argue because part of her knew it was true.
"Just....be careful," Mei said. "Make sure he’s moving toward forgiveness, not just keeping you close enough to hurt. Okay?"
"Okay, Mama."
Aria escaped to her room, stripped off her work clothes, and stood under the shower for twenty minutes, trying to process everything.
Her body still hummed. Still felt his hands, his mouth, the claiming weight of his dominance.
But her heart....her heart was uncertain.
Because her mother was right. What was the endgame? How long before he either forgave her or let her go?
And could she survive this limbo....being his but not really, having him but not completely.....indefinitely?
She didn’t have answers.
So she climbed into bed, closed her eyes, and tried not to think about tomorrow.
About going back to that office. About what new test or punishment or claiming he’d devise.
About how much she wanted him despite everything.
About how terrifying it was to love someone who might never fully trust her again.
