Chapter 495: Loud and clear
Back in the Bureau, Huojin stretched his arms and legs, humming to himself.
"Time for a break!" He chirped.
Officer Ziyang peeked out from his computer. "Inspector Mo, didn’t you just return from your break twenty minutes ago?"
He nodded. "I know right? Twenty minutes is such a long time."
"B-But I have been working non-stop for four hours!" He cried.
"Junior officers have it tough, don’t they?"
"..."
He chuckled. "So serious. Go ahead and take a break too. What’s stopping you?"
"The mountain load of work that you just dumped on me!"
Huojin took a look. "Oops. Did I do that to you? Hehe, sorry~~ I give you an extra thirty minutes for your loyal dedication!"
By then, the door opened and Jia dragged her tired body into the office.
"And here comes my source of gossip!" The Bureau just became a giant ball of sun.
Huojin bolted and the next moment, his arm was already around her neck, a wide grin laced on his lips.
"So how was your date, bestie? Oops - I should say your completely "innocent" break~?"
Watching her not return his energy, he frowned. "I was expecting an elbow jab you know? What’s wrong?"
"Ugh..." her head dropped. "I am hopeless."
"Indeed. But what did you do now?"
Jia looked up at him, dumbfounded. "You didn’t even try to deflect that."
"Because I know the truth in it. So what’s up? Also, where is Yang Mingshen? It’s rare to not see him following you."
The mention of Mingshen further dropped her shoulders and she was this close to turning into a puddle of embarrassment.
"He left."
"Where?"
"Back to his lab."
He gasped. "Did he now? What in the world could make Dr. Yang Mingshen leave your side?"
"My dumb brain. Ahhhh, I fucked up so badly. He is mad. He is super mad at me. And it’s the worst because tomorrow is his birthday. Ugh...he wouldn’t even want to see my face anymore."
Huojin wrapped his arms tighter. "Time for a bestie counselling session!"
"I just came from a break."
"Your love life is sinking here and you want to return to work? Preposterous!"
"You are learning to be more and more like Aunt Bingqing," she shook her head.
Jia found herself outside the Bureau yet again, this time on a stroll with Huojin.
"And? What was your answer?" He raised a brow. "Do you want to leave the house?"
"...Of course I denied it."
"The earlier pause tells me a different story," he dropped a smack on her head. "No wonder he stormed out. He read your hesitation just the way I did. And it gave an impression that you indeed don’t want to continue living there."
"Th-That’s not it!" she nervously tucked her hair behind her ear. "I just got anxious..."
"But why? Jia, I believe it’s crystal clear at this point - you do love him, don’t you?"
She stiffened and a momentary heat flushed in her cheeks.
"Wow, given everything that has transpired between you two, you are blushing quite late in the process."
"Sh-Shut up. This and that are different."
"But you are making it too complicated. You love him. There’s no doubt about his feelings either. It’s simply a matter of getting it across each other. You won’t feel this burdensome once you start dating. But that doesn’t mean just because the confession isn’t out yet, you treat him like a stranger. Things have progressed too far ahead for you two. So if you hesitate at this stage, he will probably assume that nothing has changed, after all. But it has, hasn’t it?"
Her shoulders dropped further. "What should I do now...? He isn’t picking up my calls."
"Before trying to contact him, first take a good look at yourself."
"I don’t understand..."
He sighed. "Do you know what the difference is between you and him? He is very confident and assertive. Even when he learned his father isn’t the real Yang Cheng, it didn’t affect even an iota of his self-respect. Somebody else in his place might have thought - Hey, I am actually a Xie. I don’t deserve this wealth and luxury because this isn’t my real identity.
But he knows what Uncle Cheng has earned and what kind of a doctor he is. He knows what kind of a doctor he is himself. So even if the world mocks him tomorrow, he would never abandon the Yang name because he truly believes his father has earned that respect and admiration - and so they deserve to be called the Yangs."
He held his waist. "Then there is you. You are confident when it comes to your work - but not so much when it comes to yourself. I know this because I have watched you all this time. You don’t hold yourself in high regard. You don’t celebrate your birthdays. You don’t like having much fun. You don’t have a favorite color because you believe you don’t need one. You don’t try to be selfish at all. And you need to start being selfish now, Jia. You want to continue living with the Yangs, so say it out loud and clear."
Loud and clear...
The mere thought sent her heart into a frenzy. But she knew the truth bombs exploded gave her no place to hide. She recalled her therapist saying something similar.
’You have let the past weigh you down all this time. It’s the past that is making you feel unworthy.’
Huojin patted her head. "I am not saying it’s easy to change overnight just because you realize it now. But because you realize it now, you could definitely start taking baby steps towards it, right? Yang Mingshen, Uncle, Aunt, Bojing, Lihua, me h - everyone totally loves and adores you. So, Jia. You can start loving yourself just a little more too, can’t you?"
Jia lowered her face, trying to hide her tears.
"Hey, hey, no crying! If Mingshen saw this, he will drag me to become his research subject! Don’t you care about me at all?"
She sniffled. "You are a good man, Huojin."
He snorted. "I always knew that. Wait, did you just realize that? How rude!" He harrumphed. "Anyway, what’s the plan now?"
Jia wiped her slightly reddened eyes and smiled. "Well first all all, I need to find a gift for him."
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