Chapter 151: Chapter 151 - Rules
Roxie got home late.
The house was dark when she pushed the door open.
She dropped her cheer bag beside the couch and sat down without turning on the main light. The small lamp near the kitchen was enough.
Her phone was in her hand.
She had two messages from Zac.
Zac: You left already?
Zac: Roxie.
She stared at them until the screen dimmed.
Then she set the phone facedown on the couch beside her.
She should text him.
She knew that.
He had won a state semifinal. He had looked for her after the game. He had probably expected something from her. A congratulations. A joke. A heart. Anything.
She had given him silence.
The worst part was she knew she was being unfair again.
She also knew she had no clean way to explain why watching him win had made her feel lonely.
A car slowed outside.
Roxie lifted her head.
Headlights swept across the front window and stopped.
Her stomach tightened before she even heard the knock.
Three soft taps.
Roxie stood.
She walked to the door and opened it.
Zac stood on the porch in a black hoodie over the dark compression shirt he wore under his jersey. His hair was still damp, and his face looked tired in a way the stadium lights had hidden. The black under his eyes had been washed off badly, leaving faint shadows near his cheekbones.
He looked exhausted and restless, like winning had only carried him so far.
Roxie gripped the edge of the door. "You’re here."
"You left."
"I rode the bus."
"You left without texting."
"You had the whole town around you."
His jaw shifted.
There it was already.
The wrong first sentence.
The wrong second.
Zac looked past her into the dim living room. "Can I come in?"
Roxie stepped back.
He entered quietly, like the house needed him to be careful.
His eyes came back to Roxie.
"She’s out?"
Roxie closed the door. "Looks like it."
Zac nodded once.
He knew better than to ask the next question.
That helped.
A little.
They stood in the living room with three feet between them and a whole week sitting in the space.
Zac rubbed one hand over the back of his neck. "I was going to go home."
"You should."
"I did. For ten minutes."
Roxie looked at his hoodie. "Then what?"
"Then I left."
"That sounds healthy."
"Yeah, well, you ignored me after the biggest game of my life, so I made a mature decision and drove here."
Roxie almost smiled.
Zac saw it, and his face eased for half a second.
Then his expression turned serious again.
"You scared me," he said.
Her almost smile disappeared.
"With the game?"
"With everything."
Roxie crossed her arms. "That’s vague."
"You fainted. You were pissed at me. Then after the game, I looked for you and you were gone."
"I was on the cheer bus."
"I know where you were." His voice stayed calm, but his eyes were sharper now. "That wasn’t the point."
His tone scared her, mostly because he sounded like he had been holding this in for hours.
The lamp buzzed softly near the kitchen.
Zac took one step closer, then stopped like he was making himself ask permission without saying it.
"Roxie."
She looked back at him.
"What happened after the game?"
She laughed once, short and ugly. "You won."
"I know I won."
"Then congratulations."
His mouth tightened. "That is the worst congratulations I’ve ever gotten."
"You had plenty of better ones."
"From everyone except the person I wanted."
Roxie’s chest pulled tight.
Zac watched her. "Talk to me."
Roxie pressed her fingers into her arms. "I watched you after the game."
"I saw you."
"You saw me for one second. I watched the rest."
Zac went quiet.
"The chants," she said. "The interviews. The reporters. The little kids. The teachers filming you. Everyone grabbing you. Everyone waiting for you."
His face changed slowly, like he was starting to understand and already hated where it was going.
Roxie kept talking before she lost it.
"You looked huge out there."
Zac blinked. "Huge?"
"Your life." Her voice tightened. "Your team. Your school. Your future. Everyone knows where you’re going. Everyone is proud of you. Everyone is watching you like you’re already halfway out of here."
"Roxie."
"And I’m standing there with poms in my hands thinking, how the hell did he even like me?"
Zac stared at her.
The room went too quiet.
Roxie regretted it the second it came out.
Then she got mad because she regretted it.
"That’s stupid," she said before he could speak. "Forget it."
"No."
"Zac."
"I’m answering that."
"I said forget it."
"I heard you."
"Then listen."
"I am listening." His voice sharpened, then he pulled it back. "But I’m answering it anyway."
Roxie glared at him.
Zac looked exhausted, still damp from the game, still carrying the night on his shoulders, but his eyes stayed on her.
"I like you because you’re you," he said. "Because you’re annoying and mean when you’re scared, and you act like needing people is a crime."
Roxie’s eyes narrowed. "This is your romantic speech?"
"I’m getting there."
"You’re failing."
"I like you because you keep standing up even when everything around you is trying to knock you down." His voice lowered. "I like you because you look at me like I’m a person, even when the whole school is acting insane."
Roxie swallowed.
Zac’s face softened. "And I like you because you make me feel normal."
The words hit harder than she expected.
Roxie hated how badly she wanted to believe that.
"I need rules," she said.
Zac paused. "Okay."
"I know I agreed to keep us a secret."
He pressed his lips together.
Roxie took a breath. "Girls are going to ask for pictures."
His face sobered.
"School posts are going to happen," she continued. "Football interviews. Reporters pulling you away. Coaches pulling you away. Your team dragging you into things."
Zac stayed quiet.
"I’ll try to swallow it," Roxie said. "I mean that. I’ll try. Some things are part of your life. You can’t shove every girl away because I’m jealous, and you can’t control what people ask from you after games."
His jaw tightened, but he let her finish.
"But you can’t look guilty every time it happens," Roxie said.
Zac’s eyes lifted to hers.
"That makes me feel crazy," she said. "When you look at me like you got caught doing something wrong, it makes it worse. It makes me feel like maybe there is something wrong. Or like I’m supposed to be mad. Or like everyone can see it on your face."
Zac exhaled slowly.
"And you can’t forget I’m there," Roxie added, quieter now. "That’s the big one."
His expression changed.
Roxie hated that her voice almost broke, so she made it sharper.
"I can handle you getting pulled away. I can handle the interviews. I can handle people wanting pictures. I can even handle Kendall if I have to, and please understand how generous that is."
Zac’s jaw tightened at Kendall’s name, but his mouth still twitched.
"But I need you to remember I’m there," she said. "Even if nobody else knows what I am to you."
Zac nodded slowly.
"I can do that," he said.
Roxie’s throat tightened.
He stepped closer. "I can do that."
She looked at his chest instead of his face. "Okay."
"But you have to do something too."
Her eyes snapped up. "Here we go."
"Roxie."
"Go ahead. I love conditions."
"It isn’t a condition."
"It sounds like one."
"It’s me asking you to stop punishing me for things I can’t control."
She hated him a little for saying it that clearly.
Mostly because he was right.
Zac kept going, voice low. "If some girl asks for a picture, that is school stuff. If a reporter asks me a question, that is football. If some girls get shoved beside me for a post, I can hate it, but I may still have to stand there for ten seconds."
Roxie looked away.
"I can follow rules," he said. "I can stop looking guilty. I can look for you. I can text you before something if I know it’s coming. I can make sure you never feel forgotten."
Her eyes burned.
"But I can’t spend every public thing waiting for you to be mad at me," he said. "I’ll mess it up if I’m scared of your reaction every time."
Roxie’s jaw tightened. "I’m trying."
"I know."
"No, you think I’m just being jealous."
"I think you’re jealous," Zac said. "And hurt. And scared. And really bad at saying scared."
Roxie stared at him.
He gave her a tired look. "What? Am I wrong?"
"Yes."
"Which part?"
"All of it."
"Liar."
Roxie stepped closer and shoved his chest lightly.
He caught her wrist before she could pull back.
They both went still.
Then Zac’s mouth curved a little, like he had remembered something he had no business bringing up in the middle of a serious conversation.
Roxie narrowed her eyes. "Why are you smiling?"
"You really can’t wonder how I like you."
"I can wonder whatever I want."
"You’re beautiful. You’re smart. You’re funny. Half the school wants you, and the other half is scared of you."
Roxie’s face warmed.
She hated that it did.
"That is such a lie."
"It is extremely true."
"You just won a state semifinal and now you’re hallucinating."
Zac smiled wider. "You pout when you know I’m right."
"I am not pouting."
"You are."
Roxie pushed his chest with her free hand. "Shut up."
He caught that hand too, then pulled her toward the couch before she could complain. She let him because fighting him suddenly felt harder than sitting down.
Zac dropped onto the couch first and pulled her down beside him.
Roxie landed against his side with a soft huff. "You’re annoying."
"You like me."
"Still under review."
He kissed the top of her head.
The small touch made her quiet.
For a moment, they stayed like that, his arm around her shoulders, her body tucked against his side, the lamp throwing weak light across the room.
Then Zac said, "Do you remember the first time I flirted with you?"
Roxie lifted her head. "Last month?"
He grinned. "Sophomore year."
She blinked. "Sophomore?"
"Yeah."
"When?"
"After practice. You were with Karen and Angela near the gym doors. I said something stupid."
"That narrows it down."
"I said you looked good. Worded different, remember?"
Roxie stared at him.
He waited.
Nothing came.
Zac laughed under his breath. "Wow. Destroying my ego in my own memory."
"I’m trying to remember."
"You looked at me for half a second, then Karen told me to keep walking before she made me regret joining sports."
That made Roxie laugh.
He smiled. "I noticed you at the beginning, Roxie."
Her chest tightened.
She looked down at his hoodie.
Sophomore year felt far away and close at the same time. She remembered pieces of it, but they were buried under other things. Claire missing dinner. Claire needing money. Roxie trying to find jobs that would even consider a girl her age. Keeping her grades high enough to protect the scholarship. Smiling at practice like everything was fine. Acting like she fit into Briarwick because the alternative was giving everyone a reason to look closer.
Zac had been around then too.
Loud.
Pretty.
Trouble.
The boy cheerleaders were warned about because he flirted like it was part of warmups.
Roxie shook her head. "I barely remember that."
"I know."
"How would you know?"
"Because you barely looked at me." His smile softened. "You were always focused. Cheer. Friends. School. Leaving fast after practice. You had your own world."
Roxie almost laughed.
Her own world.
That was one way to say problems she hid well.
"You were a menace around the squad," she said instead. "Candice always told us to stay away from your group."
Zac grinned. "Candice was smart."
"She said you were trouble."
"I was."
"Were?"
He gave her a look. "I’m trying to sound mature now."
Roxie smiled despite herself.
Zac’s thumb moved over her wrist. "She was right though."
"About you being trouble?"
"About staying away from me back then." His grin faded into something quieter. "If you gave me even an ounce of attention sophomore year, I probably would’ve fucked it up."
Roxie studied his face.
There was no joke in that.
The boy who had looked huge under stadium lights was sitting on her couch, admitting he would have ruined something before he was ready to hold it right.
That helped more than it should have.
Roxie leaned closer. "You’re still pretty good at fucking things up."
His mouth twitched. "I know."
Roxie looked at him for another second.
Then she leaned in and kissed him.
Zac’s hand came up to her cheek, slow and careful, like he knew they had both been angry for days and wanted to touch the peace without scaring it away.
The kiss stayed soft and tired.
Roxie’s fingers curled into the front of his hoodie, and Zac pulled her closer until there was barely any space left between them.
For once, she let herself stay there.
There was no stadium, no rumor, no crowd chanting his name.
Just Zac on her old couch, kissing her like the loud world outside could wait.
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