Chapter 179: Manifesting: Hannah
The next couple of days passed slowly and in a weird sort of haze. All of the security team was back, and Roman and I resumed lockdown. I knew that we wouldn’t be leaving the house for the next little while unless it was completely necessary.
Nothing urgent came up, so we resumed working from home. I took up a desk in my craft room, and Roman went to his study. It was a way for us to both focus and get what we needed done so that we could have meals together and our evenings off. It helped things feel a little better than they had before.
At least that time, I had something to work on. Something to keep my mind busy, rather than just waiting around for something to happen.
Most of the first couple of days were spent playing around with logos. I wasn’t an artist, and digital art was completely foreign, but I found a few programs and easy to follow videos to help. I wanted to at least get an idea of what I wanted so that I could hire an artist. I knew it would be easy enough to find one. I had followed so many on Instagram, and I already had a few in mind I wanted to ask.
Things were still exciting and happening, even if it was all a bit muted from being stuck inside the house. It was a bit of a painful reminder every time I moved about the house and saw guards doing their rounds. It felt like a strange sort of detention center. It had all my things, my work, and my lovely husband, but it was patrolled as though we were the criminals.
The guards were friendly enough, of course. Some of them would have small talk with me when I got to the dining room a little before Roman. They could tell how uncomfortable and weird it was for us, even if one would have thought we would have been used to it by now. I don’t think there was ever any getting used to having to have security in your own house. It was one thing to have security outside, but inside was different. It was invasive and uncomfortable, but they were mindful of that.
Still, it added to that closed off feeling. That feeling that no matter what we did, we still had to be sitting ducks. We were in danger, and our lives were practically on hold until it cleared up.
Eventually, I found my way downstairs for lunch to find Roman already sitting there. Bowls of autumn squash soup and perfectly toasted grilled cheeses sat before us. I settled in and shot Roman a smile.
"How’s it going over there?" he asked.
"Pretty okay. Still playing with logos. I feel like hands give off the wrong feel, and flowers are a bit clich’," I sighed.
"Why don’t you talk to an artist? I know you wanted to already have an idea before you went to one, but they can definitely help you brainstorm. Offer to pay for a consultation," he suggested.
"That’s what I’ll do if I really can’t figure it out,"
I nodded. "I’m just not ready to give up yet."
"Stubborn thing," he grinned at me.
We ate in peace for a bit, before he finally spoke again. "I was thinking, after the gala and once things are settled back down... Let’s go ahead and take another vacation. Maybe invite the family."
"Oh really?" I chuckled.
He nodded. "I think we could all use a little get away. Maybe we should spend Christmas in the south of France."
"Oh, that sounds heavenly," I beamed.
I could imagine it all now.
A beautiful cabin that he would rent, roomy enough to fit us all comfortably. Snow, wine, sweaters, roaring fire places, exotic cheeses and cuisine. Opening up presents in the privacy and luxury of the French countryside. It almost sounded too good to be true, especially right then with all of the stuff we had going on around us.
Would it really wrap up by Christmas? Anxiety and dread formed in the pit of my stomach.
"I would love that. Let’s revisit it once we are in the clear. I don’t wanna get my heart set on it and then get let down."
"Understandable," Roman nodded.
"Just something to think about and look forward to. One day all this will be behind us and we will be able to plan proper vacations without any worry other than finding coverage at work."
"I can’t wait for it," I said with a forced smile.
I knew he was most likely right, but at that moment, it felt farfetched and too distant to see clearly. It felt more like a daydream or a work of fiction than a real possibility. Still, I knew he meant well and I never would have thought otherwise, but it still got to me a little bit. That the future suddenly felt that way.
I sighed inwardly and made a note to bring it up to Tara.
There was a knock on the door and we both turned out heads to see the security detail gesturing in Lori and Lauren. They came and joined us at the table, Geoffrey easily serving them as well without being prompted.
"What do we owe the pleasure?" Roman questioned.
"Just because you guys are on lock down, doesn’t mean we don’t have business to attend to," Lori stated matter-of-factly.
I loved my sister dearly. Somehow she always found a way a bring life into a room so desperate into it. Sunshine and happiness hung about her like medals. I appreciated her so much.
As we ate, they got out their notebook and binders for the gala. "We have two weeks," Lauren stated firmly.
"Since you guys are on lockdown, we will be handling final appointments for caterers."
"And I’ve already set up my meetings with the event coordinator at the venue,"Lori nodded.
"I’m having our brothers meet me the night before so we can get all the art pieces inside and set up for auction. We’re also going to install a little catwalk. That way all women who are donating their dresses can do a little walk down, get a picture taken, and that photo put with the auction art pieces."
The word auction stung my ears, but I knew that this was legitimate auctions. Auctions with purpose and cause. It wasn’t selling women, it was selling paintings and dresses. All the money would go to women who had been trafficked. It just felt a little weird and backwards to raise the money through auctions.
"You’re simply too good to me," I breathed to my sister.
"Oh, please. You gave me a gift. I love planning," Lori beamed. "It’s going to be gorgeous and perfect."
"Anything I need to do?" Roman asked.
"Shave, put on a tuxedo, and bring your check book," Lauren remarked.
We all shared a laugh at just how motherly she sounded. Lori and Lauren had a way about commanding the room effortlessly, and they were both so charming and lovable that no one ever really questioned it. The girls were determined, dedicated, and meant the best for all.
"I just hope it gets to happen," I breathed.
I didn’t catch the thought before it passed my lips, as soon as I heard it, I winced.
Lori gripped my hand and tried to look me in the eye. "It’s going to happen. I know things are weird and scary right now, but you have to have hope. It’ll manifest it."
"Manifest?" I asked, blinking at her.
"Oh Lord, here she goes," Lauren laughed.
"She’s been on a manifesting kick since she found something about it on Pinterest."
"It seems helpful!" Lori huffed.
I looked at my sister and gave her an easy smile. "Tell me all about it."
My baby sister beamed at me and launched into a whole rant about all she had read about the power of positive thinking, about how hope isn’t just a wish but a force of nature, and that envisioning yourself in situations would help you subconsciously make decisions to get there. Some of what she said was a bit out there for what I believed, and some didn’t make sense, but she was so sincere about it all, I couldn’t help but be captivated.
And envisioning myself and my family spending Christmas in the south of France, well, maybe that wasn’t so bad. I smiled at her and gave her encouraging comments so that she didn’t deflate or feel judged.
We talked about it for the rest of the meal, and what she wanted to manifest. She made us all take turns saying what we wanted to manifest. They wanted successful business, I wanted Christmas in France, and Roman wanted a family of our own.
It brought a blush to my cheeks. Maybe that was something to look forward to and envision as well.
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