Chapter 51: Pretending
Raven
It took a while before the hunters returned, the wait stretching longer than usual, including Fowva and a couple of other men who had joined them for the hunt.
It was the raining season and there should have been no problem with getting meat, but for some reason the animals were harder to find than before.
When they finally came back, their clothes damp and their expressions tired, they carried a lot, but from the size and the way it was divided, I knew it wasn’t going to be as much as the previous rations.
Still, dinner came and I took my bowl, not surprised when Yoria, who was in charge, gave me a bit more than others. Her movements were quick and quiet, like she didn’t want anyone to notice. I knew better than to flaunt it, lowering my head and covering the top of the bowl slightly with my hand as I headed back to Loel and Xarna, careful not to draw attention.
They were seated together like always, with Raphal, her brother, who usually ate with us in silence, clinging close to his sister as if he didn’t trust anyone else. His eyes barely left his food.
I expected them to question the added meat in my plate, Xarna simply rolled her eyes, unimpressed.
"You look weak, clearly you need more food than the rest of us!" she said, already chomping on the bits in her plate, speaking through her chewing as Loel nodded her head in agreement.
But I was already shaking my head, the words coming out before I could stop them, "I don’t really feel that hungry to be.."
"Eat!!!" Loel ordered immediately, her tone firm enough to make me stop talking altogether.
I chuckled softly at that, the sound light despite everything, as I slowly began to eat my food, forcing myself to swallow each bite. It was good, better than I expected, and I finished it with a small smile on my lips, even licking a bit of broth from the edge of the bowl.
We talked for a while longer, about nothing important, small things that didn’t matter, before we said our goodbyes as the night settled in around us.
Instantly, I headed back to my sleeping place as fast as my legs could carry me, my steps quick but unsteady. Closing the door behind me, I leaned against it for a second before heading to the small bathroom I had, which was different from the communal toilet house that was built and cleaned by all.
Bending over, I shoved my hands into my mouth as I went ahead and retched everything in my stomach, forcing it up until there was nothing more to throw out. The sound echoed slightly in the small space, harsh and uncontrollable.
It was hard and somehow left me weaker than I thought, my arms trembling as I slid to the ground, my back against the wall. My throat burned and my eyes burned too, tears slipping down without me stopping them.
My chest felt uncomfortable, tight and heavy, but I didn’t care. Moving slowly, I pushed myself up and stumbled back into the main space, falling onto my bed just as I heard a knock on my door.
A smile formed on my lips, small and deliberate, happy that I had not wiped the gunk from my lips as I turned my head to watch whoever it was enter without waiting for my permission.
I wasn’t even the least bit surprised to see Rex.
He stood in front of me, tall, long black hair falling over his shoulders, his muscled frame filling the space easily, huge biceps visible even through his clothes as he looked down at me. There was annoyance on his face, clear and sharp, with only the faintest trace of concern hidden beneath it.
Weakly, I struggled to get up, my body protesting as I spoke, my voice hoarser than usual, "Alpha Rex!" I said, settling into a sitting position on the bed, too weak to stand properly as I felt his gaze bore into my face with all the intensity he could muster.
"You’re sick!" he said, blunt and direct.
I nodded my head as much as I could, keeping my eyes lowered, "Yes... I’m pregnant!" I told him, not even looking up to meet his gaze, already aware of what I would find there. Disgust and distaste. I fixed my eyes on the ground instead.
"It will pass!" I told him as weakly as I could, even as I struggled to hold back a smile forming at the corner of my lips. In my condition, there was no way he would mate with me. Not when the possibility could kill me, not when they needed me alive.
Silence filled the room, thick and heavy, and I waited, counting the seconds in my head until he finally opened his mouth to speak again.
"Rest then! I’ll have Gessia check on you tomorrow morning!" he said, his tone leaving no room for argument.
I nodded my head again, my fingers balling into my skirts as I sat there, gripping the fabric tightly.
Hating myself again for having ever laid with such a monster and enjoyed it. Worse when I recalled how my body had heated up, how I had begged for more like a pack whore. ’Heavens,’ not seeing how being an omega could be anything... anything but a curse.
He didn’t speak again as he turned around and headed towards the door, leaving without another word. I watched him go, watched the door close behind him, before I slowly laid back on the bed.
Most werewolves were already in their houses, sleeping or settling in for the night, but I had no intent to sleep.
Doing my best to stay awake as much as I could, forcing my eyes open in preparation for the next day, wondering why I had never actually thought about such a simple, wonderful idea before. They needed the baby to survive and grow, which meant that they would care for me as much as they could.
I had no intention to kill the baby, but I didn’t want them to kill it either.
The next morning came faster than I would have liked, having fallen asleep halfway through my attempts to stay awake. My eyes felt heavy and my body felt heavier as I scrambled to my feet, my movements sluggish, and washed my face and mouth quickly before heading out.
I woke up late and breakfast was already being served, the smell of food thick in the air as I collected a bowl. Yoria put extra portions without saying a word, her eyes flicking up to meet mine for a second before looking away.
I moved over to sit with Loel and Xarna, who both stared at me almost immediately.
"How is it that you eat more than us and yet you look worse!" Xarna said in the lowest whisper that only we could hear, leaning slightly closer.
I smiled faintly, but Loel’s concern was heavier, more obvious, "I think you’re sick! You should see the healer!" she said, her brows furrowed.
I nodded my head as I opened my mouth to take another bite, staring down at the food. My stomach was growling heavily, almost painfully, as I slowly ate it with a small smile.
"I’ll see the healer and Gessia!" I promised, and that was enough to make them settle down and focus on their own bowls.
Like before, we talked and laughed, small, quiet moments that felt normal, and it was nice.
It was very nice.
They invited me over to the river to come with them, but I turned them down, shaking my head slightly, "I need to lie down... sorry," I said, and they nodded in understanding without pressing further.
I headed back to my sleeping place, my steps slower this time, and barely closed the door behind me before shoving my hands into my mouth again, dropping to my knees on the floor in the tiny bathroom.
Throwing up everything that was in my belly, it was even worse this time, more painful, more draining, and I was too distracted to notice that someone had entered the room.
Placing my hands back on my mouth, trying to steady myself, I froze when I heard Gessia’s voice from behind me.
"I thought only humans threw up when pregnant! At least now we know who your father slept with, a human!" she said.
My entire body trembled in shock, my hands lowering slowly as I hoped she hadn’t noticed what I was doing.
But she did.
"I asked around! Especially since I needed to find out why the hell you’re so damn weak and also haven’t shifted. You’re an omega without a wolf. So even a runt is better than you!" she said, hatred clear in her voice.
I couldn’t blame her.
Since my sleeping place was the last place she wanted to be so early in the morning.
