Chapter 72: Chapter 71: What if I become a monster?
THURSDAY EVENING - 6:00 PM
By evening, Eve was exhausted....mentally, emotionally, and physically drained.
She’d practiced desire projection on five pack members simultaneously, making them all feel attraction to each other in ways that had been deeply uncomfortable to witness. She’d drained three different volunteers to various degrees, learning to control exactly how much energy she took. She’d attempted reality warping....trying to make her fantasies briefly tangible....and had managed to make a rose appear to bloom for three seconds before it returned to normal.
Each exercise had pushed her further into morally gray territory. Each new ability had shown her just how much power she was developing.....and how dangerous she could become.
Now she sat in the bathtub, trying to wash away not just the physical exhaustion but the moral weight of what she’d done today.
Damian entered the bathroom, sitting on the edge of the tub.
"How are you really doing?" he asked gently.
"I don’t know," Eve admitted. "I learned so much today. Developed abilities I didn’t know I was capable of. But Damian...I made people feel things they didn’t want to feel. I drained their life force. I manipulated their emotions like they were puppets. It felt...wrong."
"It was necessary," Damian said.
"Was it?" Eve challenged. "Or am I just telling myself that to justify becoming the kind of person who uses people as tools?"
"You’re learning skills," Damian said. "How you choose to use those skills....that’s what defines whether you’re good or evil. Today you practiced on volunteers who understood the risks and agreed to help you. That’s not evil. That’s training."
"But what about when I use these skills in combat?" Eve asked. "What about when I drain someone’s life force to defend myself? When I manipulate enemies into lowering their weapons? When I make people feel things just because it serves my purposes?"
"Then you’ll be doing what’s necessary to survive," Damian said. "Eve....the world isn’t black and white. Sometimes good people have to do morally questionable things to protect themselves and those they love. That doesn’t make them evil. It makes them survivors."
"I don’t want to become someone who manipulates people without guilt," Eve said quietly. "I don’t want these abilities to make me callous."
"Then they won’t," Damian said firmly. "Because you’re aware of the danger. Because you’re asking these questions. Because you have us to remind you who you are."
Eve wanted to believe him. But she couldn’t shake the feeling that each time she used these abilities, each time she bent someone’s will or drained their energy, she was losing a little piece of her humanity.
"What if I become a monster?" she whispered.
"Then we’ll help you maintain your humanity," Damian said simply. "Monster or not, you’re ours. And we’ll do whatever it takes to keep you grounded. To remind you of your values. To pull you back if you go too far."
Eve looked at him, seeing the absolute certainty in his eyes.
"Promise me," she said. "Promise me that if I start to change, if the power starts to corrupt me, you’ll tell me. You’ll stop me."
"I promise," Damian said without hesitation. "We all promise. You won’t face this alone. Won’t become something you’re not while we’re here to remind you who you are."
Eve nodded, taking comfort in that promise even as fear gnawed at her.
She was developing power at an unprecedented rate. Abilities that could make her one of the most dangerous beings in the supernatural world.
The question was...could she learn to wield that power without losing herself in the process?
Only time would tell
****.
Eve lay in bed, surrounded by her three mates, but couldn’t sleep.
Her mind kept replaying the day’s training. The look on Mrs. Blackwood’s face when Eve had made her feel desire. The way Marcus Junior had paled when she’d drained his energy. The power she’d felt....intoxicating and terrifying in equal measure.
"Can’t sleep?" Silas asked quietly.
"No," Eve admitted. "Too much in my head."
"Want to talk about it?" he offered.
"I’m scared," Eve said simply. "Scared of what I’m becoming. Scared that these abilities will change me into someone I don’t recognize."
"Then we’ll remind you who you are," Silas said, pulling her closer. "Every day. Every moment. We’ll be your anchor."
"What if that’s not enough?" Eve asked.
"Then we’ll find what is," Silas promised. "But Eve....you need to have faith in yourself. You’re not going to become a monster just because you have power. You’re still you. Still the woman who cried over her dying mother. Still the woman who feels guilty about affecting pack members. Still the woman who asks these moral questions."
"Monsters don’t worry about becoming monsters," Damon added from her other side. "The fact that you’re afraid of corruption means you’re still grounded. Still aware. Still human where it counts."
"I don’t feel human anymore," Eve said quietly.
"You’re not," Damian said bluntly. "You’re succubus. You’re supernatural. You’re powerful. But that doesn’t mean you’ve lost your humanity. Humanity isn’t about what species you are. It’s about your choices. Your values. Your compassion. And you still have all of those."
Eve wanted to believe them. Wanted to trust that she could develop these terrifying abilities without losing the core of who she was.
But doubt lingered.
Tomorrow, Markov would push her further. Would teach her more dangerous skills. Would show her just how much power she was capable of wielding.
And each new ability would test her values a little more. Challenge her morality a little harder. Push her closer to that line between protector and predator.
She just hoped that when the testing came....when her enemies finally arrived and she had to use these abilities in actual combat....she’d still be able to recognize herself afterward.
Still be Eve Chen, not just the Seraphim heir with terrifying power.
She fell asleep with that hope held close, surrounded by the three men who’d promised to keep her grounded.
Tomorrow would bring more training. More abilities. More moral tests.
But tonight, she was just Eve.
And that would have to be enough.
