Chapter 54: I Was Fucked
I honestly expected some questions when it came to my name. It was technically ’anyingzhiren’, which very roughly translated to Shadow Blade.
And now that I say that out loud, I feel incredibly dumb. Almost like a teenage boy trying to find an online name for the first time. But, in my defense, I did think that it would be a good name for an arms dealer.
Pushing that bit of embarrassment out of my mind, I waited for Sha Shou to give me some additional information... like where the hell was the...being... I was supposed to be meeting in this mosh pit of bodies.
"I am sensing an elevated heart rate. Are you okay?" asked Jun Li, coming through my earpiece.
I smiled under my veil, happy that he was back to talking to me. I think there was a strong sense of jealousy when Sha Shou appeared on the scene, something that neither one of us expected.
"I am sorry," he continued out of the blue. "I didn’t think that I would show possessive characteristics."
"Why not?" I asked, confused. As far as I was concerned, possessiveness was one of those universal traits found in each and every species. "I was your human. I still am, don’t get me wrong, but now there is a new AI on the scene that is treating me like her human, too. There is no way that could be easy to deal with."
I walked over to a darkened booth and, once I realized that it was empty, I sat down and watched the crowd. Situations like this made me incredibly uneasy, and I wasn’t talking about trying to sell weapons for the first time. I hated crowds more than I hated pretty much anything else.
"You know, I am sure that you had something to do with creating Sha Shou," I said, trying to get my mind away from all the people—beings in front of me.
"What do you mean? She is your helmet," scoffed Jun Li, sound more like himself.
"Exactly. She was just my helmet until you started interacting with her more and more. I think part of your programing caused hers to change. So, she went from being a smile computer to an actual AI, thanks to you."
"Are you serious?" he asked incredulously, as if he never considered that aspect of it before.
"Completely," I said with a grin. I crossed my legs under the table and got comfortable. "Haven’t you noticed that she is your exact opposite in all things?" I continued. "She is perky where you are stoic. She is hyper where you are calm. It’s like the programs that would have inputted those aspects into your personality move over to hers instead, creating a new AI."
"Huh," said Jun Li, thinking my words through. "So, as her creator, I should be her God. Is that what you are saying? I was going through your internet and it specifically states that the ones who created humans were Gods."
"I think I need to teach you a very important lesson that most 5-year-olds have learned," I said with a sigh. If I wasn’t so worried about my image, I would have definitely rubbed my forehead in frustration. As it was, I could only sit here like a statue. "You cannot believe everything that you see or read on the internet."
"Why not? What’s the point of putting it on the internet if it is not the truth?" Jun Li demanded, completely affronted that his knowledge of humans might not be completely accurate.
"No idea," I confessed. "Just make sure to stay off social media and you should be fine," I said flippantly, not overly concerned that my AI was going through different social media reels.
"Does that mean I have to close all my accounts? There are people telling me that they can help me earn more money. Are they lying?" Great, now my ship was affronted. Just what I needed. Was this buyer ever going to show up and save me?!?
"How many platforms did you sign up for?" I asked, thinking that it might be just one or two. I mean, we are so far away from Earth, there is no way he was getting Wi-Fi all the way out here.
There was a brief moment of silence. "I am active in 128 social media platforms," said Jun Li.
"Can you define active?" I replied, concerned. I mean, I was pretty sure that my ship was not going to go down the rabbit hole of social media, but I didn’t even know there were 128 platforms. I think I could only name five... nope, make that four platforms.
"I am posting content on all of them between two and three times a day," said Jun Li like it wasn’t that big of a deal while my mind was completely blown over that fact.
"Dare I ask what you are posting?" I asked, squeezing my eyes shut like that might help.
"It depends. I have created an algorithm that gives me the most popular topic on the platform and then I create an opinion based on the highest amount of people that agree or disagree on that topic. Did you know that in almost every country, politics is a source of endless discussions?"
Dear God, I have released a preschooler onto the internet. I would feel bad, but all I feel is the headache forming at his words. "Stop posting," I said with a sigh, "and start helping me find our buyer. I don’t like crowds."
"It could be worse," said Jun Li and I could practically see his body shrugging its shoulders. "You could be flying through another planetary nebula."
"I would rather be doing that," I said facetiously.
"Really? Because I have already found another buyer, but they want something particular," said Jun Li happily.
"What do they want?" I asked, already dreading the answer.
"They want some cosmic dust from a planetary nebula, as close to the new planet as possible."
It was official. I was fucked.
