Chapter 36 Judge Yang Requests a Painting
Yang Zhiyuan entered the courtyard, accompanied by an attendant.
“Brother Gao!”
He greeted politely.
Gao You smiled slightly in return, acknowledging the greeting.
Zhao Pan’er quickly explained, “My husband isn’t very social.”
“I understand!”
Yang Zhiyuan chuckled and nodded before following his attendant into the guest hall.
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“Please, have a seat!”
Zhao Pan’er hurriedly welcomed him.
Yang Zhiyuan sat down and spoke with a smile, “Brother Gao, I apologize for this unannounced visit.”
“In truth, I came to discuss painting and calligraphy.”
Gao You remained silent.
Zhao Pan’er swiftly brought over tea.
Yang Zhiyuan didn’t seem to mind Gao You’s lack of response. Instead, he pulled out a scroll he had prepared.
“This is a Lady’s Portrait by Master Xu.”
Master Xu—the renowned artist of this world.
Gao You’s previous self had seen many of Master Xu’s paintings. One quick glance told him—this painting was a fake.
Master Xu’s brushwork and line work were vastly different from what he was seeing. This reminded him—Zhao Pan’er once gave Yang Zhiyuan a fake Night Banquet painting. And he didn’t even notice.
Clearly—this man had terrible art appraisal skills. He had probably been scammed out of a fortune.
_____
“Brother Gao, do you know the story behind this portrait?”
Yang Zhiyuan’s eyes sparkled with excitement.
“Master Xu and this lady had a secret romance. Back then, Master Xu was still an unknown artist.”
“They met aboard a merchant ship bound for Tokyo.”
“But Master Xu, being a lowly commoner, stayed in the lower quarters of the ship, while the lady—a noblewoman’s daughter—stayed in the upper deck.”
…
This sounded like Titanic. Yang Zhiyuan continued enthusiastically, completely unaware that Gao You’s expression had turned blank. After listening to the entire story, Gao You felt his worldview collapse.
Wasn’t Yang Zhiyuan supposed to be a noble and refined official?
Turns out—he was just an older man obsessed with gossip!
If Master Xu ever heard this fabricated love story, he’d probably hunt down Yang Zhiyuan for a duel.
______
“Is that story true?”
Gao You feigned ignorance.
Yang Zhiyuan shook his head.
“Who can say what’s true or not?”
“But don’t you think a painting becomes more captivating when it has a story?”
“That’s why I bought this painting—the story made it irresistible!”
Oh.
So he got conned into buying a fake because of a fake story.
Gao You held back his laughter.
Seeing that Gao You wasn’t annoyed by his storytelling, Yang Zhiyuan excitedly pulled out another painting.
And with it—a new story.
An hour passed, he had told seven or eight different stories. Some were secrets, some were scandals, some were gossip. All of them expanded Gao You’s knowledge of aristocratic drama.
Looking at Yang Zhiyuan, Gao You almost felt like suggesting he start a gossip magazine.
“Brother Gao!”
Finally, the real reason for his visit emerged.
“I have a request.”
“Oh?”
“I would like to commission a painting from you!”
______
“A painting?”
Gao You frowned slightly.
Yang Zhiyuan nodded earnestly.
“That’s right! Please, Brother Gao, I humbly request this favor.”
To his credit, Yang Zhiyuan had sent his invitation even before the imperial edict arrived.
He had been polite and respectful the entire time. And he had talked himself hoarse for an hour. It wouldn’t be appropriate to reject him outright. So, after a moment of thought, Gao You nodded.
“…Fine.”
_____
He actually agreed!
Yang Zhiyuan’s eyes widened in disbelief.
He had expected rejection—just like so many others before him.
“When can I collect it?”
“Wait a moment.”
To everyone’s surprise, Gao You immediately stood up and walked to his bedroom.
Zhao Pan’er blinked in confusion.
“What is High Lang doing?”
“Painting.”
Inside, Gao You spread out a sheet of rice paper on the table. Zhao Pan’er hurriedly prepared the ink and brushes.
But before she could bring them over—Gao You pulled out a seal… and stamped the bottom right corner of the paper.
“All done.”
Then, he walked out with the paper in hand.
Zhao Pan’er stood frozen.
…What just happened?
“That was fast!”
Yang Zhiyuan looked astonished.
Gao You smiled and handed him the rolled-up paper.
“Child’s Play.”
Yang Zhiyuan frowned.
“…That’s the title?”
Unrolling the scroll, he was stunned. Because the entire painting was completely blank. Except for the artist’s seal—there was nothing drawn at all.
“…What is this?”
He looked up at Gao You, utterly baffled.
Gao You smiled.
“A sheep eating grass.”
“…Where’s the sheep?”
Yang Zhiyuan instinctively asked.
Gao You shrugged.
“It finished eating and left.”
“…Then where’s the grass?”
Gao You looked at him as if he were an idiot.
“…It ate it.”
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“Ah—”
Yang Zhiyuan’s eyes widened in realization.
So THAT’S why it’s called ‘Child’s Play’!
He had been completely trolled!
But—he loved it.
It was clever!
“Brilliant! I am very satisfied. Thank you, Brother Gao!”
Laughing, he rolled up the empty scroll and left.
Zhao Pan’er frowned.
“…Was he really happy about that?”
“Absolutely.”
Gao You nodded confidently.
“He loves stories.”
“The painting doesn’t even matter.”
Zhao Pan’er thought about it—then realized he was right. Compared to a masterpiece, a painting like ‘A Sheep Eating Grass’ was perfectly suited for him.
Whenever he took it out, it would shock the crowd—And then, they’d be forced to listen to his stories.
_______
“Wife, do you have anything to do today?”
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Hearing his question, Zhao Pan’er pouted.
Fu Bo had been digging holes everywhere, even blocking the path to the tea house. There was no way to open for business. Unless she expected scholars and nobles to wade through mud just to drink tea? So, the tea shop had to close temporarily. For once, Zhao Pan’er had a few days to relax.