Chapter 344: Relationship Problems
Luca’s jaw dropped.
"Relationship problems? Me!?"
He looked absolutely stunned, like someone had just told him that the sky wasn’t actually blue.
"That’s impossible! I treat my wives lovingly! I give them all the affection in the world!"
He furrowed his brow, genuinely thinking.
"From what I know, there isn’t a single one that I’ve mistreated. How is this even possible?"
Before Leona could respond, he produced a notebook and pen from seemingly nowhere.
"Nonetheless." He said seriously. "If they have complaints, then they must have valid reasons."
’And as their partner, I always need to improve myself. I need to be the best husband I could possibly be."
"So, please—tell me everything I did wrong so that I can fix it!"
Leona blinked.
If any normal husband heard such complaints, he would immediately argue.
He would defend himself, insist that he was doing everything right, that the relationship was perfect.
But not Luca.
Luca immediately took out a notebook to write down all the criticisms. He genuinely wanted to improve. He wanted to be better for his wives.
How could she possibly stay angry at him?
"It’s not what you think." Leona said, shaking her head.
"It’s not anything you’re doing wrong, Luca. It’s...it’s the exact opposite."
She looked up at him with a peculiar expression.
"It’s that you’re doing everything too right. You’re showering them with so much love they can’t handle it."
Luca looked up at her weirdly. "Too...right? Top much love? What do you mean?"
"Don’t act as if you don’t know, Luca!" Leona scoffed. "I’m obviously talking about the fact that you pamper your wives too much!"
She sighed and nodded sympathetically as she said,
"Look, I get it. I really do. You want to make sure everyone feels cherished—especially after their past lives, back when the male elves denied them any affection."
"You’re trying to make up for all the years they felt unloved."
Luca nodded. "That’s exactly right."
"But still." Leona continued, her tone sharpening. "That doesn’t mean you can completely overwhelm them with affection to the point where you’re driving them crazy!"
Luca opened his mouth, but Leona was on a roll.
"For example, you don’t let any of your wives do a single chore!"
"Whether it’s cooking, cleaning, preparing meals, washing dishes, or picking berries—anything!"
"You use your projections to do everything! You act like a maid instead of a husband!"
Luca scratched his head. "But I just want to help—"
"Help? Well, when they try to help, you just pick them up and put them back on the chairs like they’re children!"
She herself had suffered this indignity. After finally reuniting with her family, Leona had dreamed of cooking for them, caring for them, doing all the things she’d been unable to do for years.
But Luca waltzed in and gently but firmly took over everything. She wasn’t allowed to lift a finger.
She was a Matriarch who couldn’t even season her own soup.
Luca scratched his head. "But...isn’t that a good thing? I’m helping my pregnant wives. They shouldn’t overexert themselves."
"Helping, yes!" Leona poked his chest. "Taking over their entire existence, no!"
"They’re so bored and restless they’re literally searching for chores to do in secret. They complain to me, and I have to listen!"
"And it’s not just chores!" She poked him again, harder.
"You won’t let them eat their own food! You feed them like they’re babies! Why? Why are you doing the ’choo-choo train’ with grown women who are about to become mothers?"
Luca shrugged earnestly. "I want them to have the perfect eating experience. Every spoonful needs the ideal aspect ratio of meat, vegetables, and grains. I calculate it. It’s precise."
Leona’s soul briefly left her body.
"Their children are teasing them, Luca. The little ones are saying, ’Mama, I can eat by myself, why can’t you?’ They are mortified."
Luca opened his mouth to protest, but Leona cut him off.
"And that’s not all! Combing their hair, helping them dress, scrubbing them in the bath—they just stand there like statues! What do you think you’re doing?"
"I’m just taking care of them." Luca said quietly. "They’re pregnant. They need someone to help them."
"Taking care of them is one thing." Leona said in frustration. "But you’re going too far! The worst part is that you won’t let anyone walk anywhere."
"You carry them everywhere like they’re pets!"
"The risk of tripping is too high—"
"And you even take them to the bathroom!"
Leona’s face was bright red now as she muttered,
"You...You offered to wipe my ass, Luca! How dare you think I’m so incompetent that I can’t even do something like that!"
Luca looked genuinely flustered now.
"I just thought that with your belly, it might be hard to stretch—"
"I don’t want to hear your excuses!" Leona snapped. "You’re treating us like children! Like we’re helpless babies who can’t do anything for ourselves!"
"And I...I...I..."
Leona finally sighed, the fight draining out of her after that rant.
She never would have expected this. Everyone in the village thought Luca be living like a king with an entire village of elves to serve him.
He’d have a throne, foot massages, elves feeding him grapes.
But it was the exact opposite.
The wives were treated like queens, and Luca was constantly at their service, spoiling them beyond reason.
At first, after years of mistreatment, the elves loved it. They fell deeper in love with him.
But then...it became too much.
Being treated like helpless infants who couldn’t do anything for themselves? That was frustrating!
And they’d all come to Leona to complain about their husband who loved them ’too much’.
What a strange problem to have.
But then she looked at Luca’s guilty expression and felt a pang of sympathy.
He was trying so hard. Doing his absolute best for them. And here she was, complaining.
She patted his back gently.
"It’s alright, Luca. I-I know you’re trying. But you have to let them do some things too."
Luca struggled visibly, then nodded. "Fine. I’ll let them help with chores."
"But—"
"I’ll monitor them." He added solemnly. "I’ve learned living with you elves that you’re not as dignified as you appear. You trip over random things. I have to make sure nothing happens."
"Of course, of course." Leona said quickly. "As long as you don’t do everything yourself."
She then looked at him with a more serious expression.
"There’s a second complaint, too."
Luca’s face fell. "Another complaint? What did I do now!?"
Leona’s cheeks flushed slightly. "It’s similar to the first problem. You’re loving your wives a little too much...but in a different way."
Luca stared at her blankly.
"I mean...in the night." Leona added, her blush deepening.
Luca’s face went red. "Oh."
"Some of the elves have been complaining." Leona continued, unable to meet his eyes. "They say the moaning coming from the tree houses at night is too much. They can’t sleep."
She looked down at her feet. "I have to agree. The moment midnight hits, it’s like a jungle of...sounds. Every single elf is moaning and screaming at the top of their lungs."
"That has nothing to do with me, Leona!" Luca had the audacity to shrug.
"If you’re going to blame anyone, blame your horny villagers. They’re the ones who call for me at night. I’m just doing my duties as a husband and taking care of their needs!"
He smirked at Leona.
"And you of all people shouldn’t be talking about this. You’re the worst offender. You call me over every single night, even though you’re already pregnant, and you beg me to..."
"Stop! Stop! Stop!" Leona’s face was redder than she’d ever been. "There’s no need to say such things!"
Luca composed himself.
"Anyway, I can’t do anything about that. If the other elves have a problem with it, they should take it up with the ones making the noise."
"Tell them to stop moaning so loudly."
"It wouldn’t be such a big problem if you weren’t so good at performing your nightly deeds." Leona muttered under her breath.
"What was that?" Luca asked, leaning closer.
"Nothing!" Leona said quickly. "But still, you can’t disturb the sleep of all the elves! The elders need their rest at their age!"
Luca scoffed once again, looking even offended as he exclaimed in disbelief,
"What are you talking about, Leona? The elders are literally the ones moaning the loudest!"
"After being pent up for centuries, they’ve gone completely crazy! Ever since they got the pseudo sacred mark, they’ve been calling me over all day and night!"
"They’re probably the horniest elves in the entire village!"
Leona wanted to argue, but she realized with a sinking feeling that Luca was telling the truth.
The elders had been looking so full of vitality lately, so alive and vibrant, that it had seemed almost suspicious.
Her point had completely fallen apart.
"Anyway." She said weakly. "You still have to do something about it. If this continues, no one will be able to sleep properly. And that could affect the pregnancies of the babies."
That made Luca’s expression go serious.
Leona continued, her voice getting shyer.
"Not to mention the children. The mothers don’t even know how to explain what’s going on."
"They’ve been saying there are animals that go crazy at night, but it’s becoming harder to make the children believe that excuse."
Luca nodded slowly. "I guess I really do need to do something."
"Yes! Definitely!"
"Maybe I can noise insulate all the bedrooms." He mused. "Install foam it all the rooms. And noise-canceling headphones too, for the elves who want to sleep."
Leona let out a sigh of relief. "I don’t know what any of that means, but whatever it is, do it quickly. Before I get another complaint."
But despite everything she had just said, Leona couldn’t help but smile.
The situation was absurd, really.
In the past, the village had been full of weeping, of elves crying about how they received no love, how their partners abused or ignored them.
Now the problem was exactly the opposite.
Luca loved them too hard, too thoroughly, too completely.
They were drowning in affection and complaining about the water being too warm.
’If I had to choose between any problem.’ She thought. ’This was the one to have.’
