Chapter 312: The Heavens Are Going To Smite You!
Luca’s roar shattered the fragile silence like thunder cracking across the valley.
The elves gasped, eyes wide with pure horror.
Their hands flew to their mouths as they stared at him in disbelief.
He was cursing a Goddess!
Right out in the open, without a single shred of restraint!
And he didn’t stop there...
...Instead it only got worse.
"You absolute piece of dog-shit!"
He bellowed, voice rising with raw, unfiltered fury.
"You crazy, meddling, cock-teasing, brain-dead whore! What the actual fuck is wrong with you?!"
He paced across the platform like a caged animal, fists clenched so tight his knuckles turned white.
The valley echoed with his voice as he unleashed every vulgar insult he could summon.
"You keep fucking meddling over and over again like some bored, horny cosmic slut who gets off on ruining my life!"
"You think this is funny?!" He let out a manic chuckle. "You think dropping those goddamn wet dreams on everyone was going to help me?!"
"I was this close—this fucking close—to actually fixing everything, and you just had to shove your divine fingers into my pie and make them all dream about me railing them into next week!"
He threw his hands up toward the sky, middle fingers raised high.
"You absolute bitch! What kind of fucking grudge do you have against me?!"
"Did I piss in your holy fountain?"
"Did I fuck your sister?"
"Or are you just so goddamn bored up there in your shiny little paradise that you decided to blue-ball the one mortal trying to do something right?!"
"Damn you, you cock-blocking, reality-warping, sadistic cunt! I hope your divine pussy gets cursed with eternal dryness for the next thousand years!"
Hearing all the vulgarity so bad that it would make a person’s ears bleeeds, the elves looked like they were about to faint.
The mothers covered the ears of their daughters ears
Leona’s face had gone deathly pale.
Luna covered her ears, whimpering.
Lulu stared with wide, fascinated eyes, as if she’d just discovered a new forbidden game.
Nyx, of course, was biting her lip to keep from laughing.
But Luca wasn’t done. He spun around, still shouting at the heavens.
"I swear to every god that isn’t you—if I ever figure out how to climb up there, I’m going to shove my foot so far up your divine ass you’ll be tasting boot leather for eternity!"
And finally—Lulu, never one to miss out on the fun, jumped up beside him. She pointed at the sky and started fighting right alongside him.
"Exactly you dumb goddess! Luca’s trying his best, and you keep messing it up! I hate you so much!"
"The next time I see you, I’ll beat you up! I don’t care if you’re a goddess or not—I’ll summon an army of chickens to peck you to death!"
Soon, both Luca and Lulu were teaming up, calling the goddess of fertility every terrible name imaginable.
Their rant grew more and more creative, more and more hilarious in its intensity.
The crowd grew paler and paler and finally the terrified Luna couldn’t hold herself back anymore.
"Stop it, Luca, stop!" She cried, grabbing his arm. "I know you’re angry right now, and you have every right to be, but you really can’t curse the goddess!"
"Why not?!" Luca scoffed. "She messed everything up! It’s only natural that I’d want to scold the shit out of her!"
"But she’s a goddess!" Luna shook her head frantically. "She could just send heavenly lightning right onto your head and destroy you on the spot!"
The other elves chimed in with their worries:
"Stop it, Luca! Don’t do it!"
"It’s not worth it!"
"Please, we need you for our children in the future!"
"I don’t want to become a widow! Being a wife is so much fun!"
Everyone was terrified, absolutely petrified that Luca was about to be smote from the heavens.
They imagined him being struck down by divine lightning, leaving them all alone.
But Luca just sneered. With absolute confidence blazing in his eyes, he looked up at the sky and said.
"She’s going to kill me?"
He let out a sharp, derisive laugh.
"Well, let her try. Let’s see who ends up being erased out of existence—whether it’s her or me."
His voice was challenging, defiant, as if he was daring the heavens themselves to strike him down.
Everyone gasped and shrieked.
What he was saying was absurd! Absolutely crazy!
They knew Luca was strong—he was the strongest entity in this entire world, they’d realized that much.
But there was a problem.
When it came to goddesses who ruled over entire universes, they didn’t believe Luca could do anything at all.
He was strong, but he wasn’t divine.
And yet, the way he spoke was almost as if he had utmost confidence in even beating a goddess herself, which baffled them entirely.
But Luca didn’t care.
He continued his rant, calling her every single slur imaginable, even inventing some elven slurs on the spot.
Lulu gathered her courage and joined in again, their voices rising together in righteous fury.
Luna was terrified. She didn’t know what to do. She thought for sure that her sister and Luca were going to be smote from existence.
Even Nyx was concerned now, as this didn’t seem like a smart move at all.
But then Leona, who had been watching the entire spectacle with a calm expression, finally stepped in.
She didn’t use Luna’s approach. She didn’t try to persuade Luca with words.
Instead, she simply stood in front of him and called out his name.
"Luca."
The moment he looked down at her, she reached up and grabbed his face.
"!"
Before he could react, she pulled down her dress, revealing her plump, full breasts, and stuffed his face right into them.
"Damn it, Leona—!" Luca’s protests were muffled.
"Don’t you think these pair of puppies will be able to stop me! I’ll definitely crush that goddess out! I’ll beat her to death right now!"
But Leona wasn’t listening. She grabbed her breast, guiding her nipple directly into his mouth. It slipped past his lips, and he sputtered and spit.
"No, stop! This can’t defeat me! Wait, no, I can’t—I have to—"
She pushed more and more.
"I have to curse her out, I have to—"
She pushed again.
"Nooo, I...I..."
And finally, Luca couldn’t hold back anymore.
His protests died in his throat. His mouth closed around Leona’s nipple, and he began to suckle.
"Lick!♡~ Mmph!♡~ Ahh!♡~ Suck!♡~"
His tongue lapped at her breast. His hands came up to grab onto her other breast, and he started sucking like a little baby, content and peaceful.
He looked like he’d been given a pacifier and put to rest.
The entire clearing let out a collective sigh of relief.
Luna’s hand flew to her chest as she watched Luca calm down.
"Thank the spirits." She breathed. "He’s not going to die anymore."
The other elves couldn’t help but clap in admiration.
"As expected of Leona!" One said. "She totally deserves the title of First Wife!"
"She knew exactly how to take care of Luca." Another added approvingly. "As suspected of her."
"You should all learn more tricks from her!" A third elf called out.
Leona blushed deeply but smiled shyly.
"I-It’s nothing really."
She just held onto Luca as he switched his face to her other breast, suckling contentedly.
But Lulu, on the other hand, smiled mischievously.
"Even if you can stop Luca." She declared. "you can’t stop me!"
She was about to start cursing the goddess again—but Nyx moved swiftly.
She did the exact same thing, plopping out her fat, milky breasts and pushing one into her niece’s face.
Lulu, who couldn’t handle the scent of Nyx’s fragrant breast and the sight of her pink nipples, immediately started sucking too.
"Boobies." She murmured, her voice dreamy. "So tasty..."
She too reverted to a baby-like state, suckling contentedly.
And just like that, two ticking time bombs were completely defused by two pairs of beautiful breasts.
The rest of the village looked on with a mixture of amusement andrelief.
They had witnessed something truly remarkable—the power of a woman’s love, and the effectiveness of a well-timed, well-positioned breast.
But just as the tension in the clearing had finally begun to dissipate—the peaceful atmosphere shattered like glass.
An elf came sprinting over from the communications building, her long ears flapping behind her like banners in the wind.
She leaned down from the bridge, slightly out of breath, and addressed Leona and Nyx with obvious urgency.
"Leona! Nyx!" She called out, her voice carrying a note of panic. "All the races have transmitted messages to us! They’ve responded to the situation!"
The assembled elves immediately went still, their earlier relief evaporating into tense anticipation.
The messenger’s face twisted into a hesitant, nervous expression—the kind worn by someone about to deliver devastating news and desperately wishing they could be anywhere else.
"And none of it was good." She added grimly. "None of it at all."
A collective groan rippled through the crowd.
The elves had already known deep in their hearts that the outcome of this disastrous meeting would be catastrophic.
But hearing it confirmed only made the weight of the situation crash down upon them even harder.
"What are we going to do?" One elf whispered.
"How is Luca going to deal with this?" Another fretted.
"We’re doomed." A third declared dramatically. "Utterly, completely doomed."
Leona’s face tensed, her earlier contentment replaced by the heavy burden of leadership. She looked toward Nyx, her expression grim.
"I think both of us should go and check out the messages."
She glanced down at Luca, who was still latched onto her breast like a newborn, completely oblivious to the chaos around him.
A helpless smile crossed her face as she patted his head affectionately.
"Let’s leave Luca here." She said softly. "If he hears any more negative words right now, he’ll probably burst a vessel out of sheer anger."
She turned to Nyx with a calm, practical expression.
"We’ll relay everything to him later—once he’s had time to settle down."
Nyx nodded in agreement.
"That’s probably for the best. The Hero’s temper has already been thoroughly tested today."
But before they could leave, Nyx’s eyes swept across the crowd and landed on Luna.
A mischievous smile spread across her face as she grabbed her niece and pulled her closer.
"Me and your mother are going to take care of some official business right now."
Nyx announced, her voice dripping with playful intent.
"Until then, you’re in charge of taking care of the Hero and your sister."
Luna blinked in confusion. "Wait, what do you mean—"
But Nyx didn’t give her time to finish. Before Luna could even process what was happening, her aunt grabbed the top of her dress and yanked it down with practiced efficiency.
"AUNTIE NYX!" Luna shrieked, her face turning crimson. "WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!"
Nyx didn’t respond. Instead, she reached over and pulled Lulu away from her own breast, where she had been contentedly suckling.
With a swift motion, she transferred the still-sucking Lulu directly onto Luna’s exposed chest.
Lulu’s eyes lit up as she saw another pair of beautiful breasts in front of her.
"MORE BOOBIES!" She exclaimed gleefully, and immediately latched onto Luna’s nipple.
"NO, LULU, STOP!" Luna cried out. "THAT’S TICKLISH!"
But Lulu didn’t stop. In fact, she seemed to suck even harder, her enthusiasm undiminished.
Seeing this, Leona also pulled Luca away from her own breast.
His eyes snapped open, and for a moment, the familiar anger flickered there—but before it could fully ignite, Leona pushed him toward Luna as well.
"Handle him too, dear." Leona said calmly. "Make sure he doesn’t get angry again and start cursing the gods above."
"I’m leaving the responsibility to you!"
Luca, now face-to-face with Luna’s other breast, didn’t hesitate. He grabbed onto it with both hands and started sucking even more aggressively than before.
"Ahhh—! Nooo—! You two—!" Luna whimpered helplessly.
On one side, her sister was enthusiastically nursing.
On the other side, her husband was doing the same thing with equal fervor.
She could only hold both of them and pray they didn’t bite her nipples off with how aggressive they were being.
"Good luck, dear!" Leona called out cheerfully as she and Nyx walked away, leaving Luna to her fate.
