Chapter 76: Losing Her Is Going To Destroy Us
"You can’t be serious," Lucian said. He moved toward the desk, his movements sharp and agitated. "You can FEEL what’s happening, Nicholas. You can feel the bond. She’s our mate. We can’t just let her leave."
"We can," Nicholas said, finally looking up from his desk. His silver eyes were cold, controlled, but there was a flicker of something else underneath....pain, perhaps. Or regret. "And we will."
"Why?" Lucian demanded. The question came out like a curse. "Give me one reason why we would find our mate and then let her go?"
Nicholas set down his pen with deliberate care. When he spoke, his voice was measured, but every word landed like a hammer.
"Because," he said slowly, "she didn’t choose this. She didn’t choose us. She was brought here under false pretenses and traumatized in ways we are still trying to understand. And forcing a mate bond on her, forcing her to stay, would be the cruelest thing we could possibly do."
"It would be survival," Lucian shot back. "Do you have any idea what’s going to happen to us when she leaves? Do you feel what Zev is doing? Do you understand that our wolves are going to suffer in ways we can’t even comprehend?"
Sebastian made a sound, something between a groan and a curse. He stood from the chair and began pacing, his hands clenched into fists at his sides.
"He’s right," Sebastian said quietly, not looking at either of his brothers. "When she leaves, we’re going to break. All three of us. The bond is already formed, we’re bonded to her whether we’ve marked her or not. Losing her is going to destroy us."
Nicholas’s jaw tightened slightly. It was the first crack in his control.
"I know," he said quietly.
The words hung in the air between them.
"You know?" Lucian’s voice rose. "You KNOW that losing her is going to destroy us, and you’re still insisting we let her go? That’s not strategic thinking, Nicholas. That’s self-destruction."
"It’s ethics," Nicholas replied coldly. "It’s the only decision we can live with."
Lucian moved around the desk until he was standing directly in front of his oldest brother. His entire frame was vibrating with barely contained energy. His golden eyes were so bright they looked almost feverish.
"Ethics?" Lucian laughed, and it was a broken sound. "Ethics won’t keep us sane when she’s gone. Ethics won’t stop Zev from tearing me apart from the inside out. Ethics is a luxury we can’t afford, Nicholas."
Nicholas stood to face him directly. They were of similar height, but Nicholas carried himself with an authority that made him seem taller, more imposing. His silver eyes locked onto Lucian’s golden ones, and the air between them became charged with tension.
"If we keep her here against her will," Nicholas said, his voice dropping to something dangerous and quiet, "if we mark her and force her to accept a bond she doesn’t understand, we become the thing we’ve been afraid of becoming. We become our father."
The words landed like a physical blow.
Lucian stepped back as if he’d been struck.
Sebastian stopped pacing. The room fell completely silent.
"You don’t get to say that," Lucian whispered. His voice had lost its sharp edge, replaced by something that sounded almost like despair. "You don’t get to invoke that comparison. We’re not him."
"No," Nicholas agreed quietly. "We’re not. And we’re going to prove that by making the choice he would never have made. We’re going to let her go."
"And then what?" Lucian asked. He sounded broken now, the desperation bleeding through every syllable. "What happens to us, Nicholas? What happens when she leaves and we’re still bonded to her? When our wolves are screaming for a mate we can’t reach? What happens when weeks pass and the bond is still there, still pulling, still demanding?"
Nicholas returned to his desk and sat down. He looked older suddenly, like the weight of this decision was pressing down on him with physical force.
"Then we survive it," he said. "We do what we’ve always done. We endure."
Sebastian moved to the window and looked out at the darkening estate. His voice, when he spoke, was barely above a whisper.
"Rhen doesn’t want to endure," Sebastian said. "Rhen wants her. Every part of me that is wolf wants her. And every part of me that is human understands why we have to let her go. I’m being torn apart from the inside, and I don’t know which part is winning."
"The human part," Nicholas said firmly. "The human part has to win. Because if we let our wolves make this decision, we lose everything that makes us better than the animals they are."
Lucian returned to the window and pressed his forehead against the glass. His breathing was still ragged, still uncontrolled. When he spoke, his voice was muffled.
"I don’t know if I can do this," he said. "I don’t know if I can stand there tomorrow and watch her leave knowing that I could have kept her. Knowing that I could have marked her and she would be ours forever."
"You can do it," Nicholas said. "Because you’re going to remember what her face looked like when she woke up with no memory of what happened. You’re going to remember her terror. You’re going to remember the fact that she’s been traumatized enough without us adding to it by trapping her in a bond she didn’t consent to."
"She would consent eventually," Lucian said, and there was a desperate hope in his voice. "Mates always do. The bond would make her...."
"No." Nicholas’s voice cut through like a blade. "We are not going to have this conversation. We are not going to pretend that manipulating a mate bond is acceptable because she might eventually accept it. That’s not how this works. That’s not who we are."
Lucian turned from the window, and his face was a mask of anguish.
"Then who are we?" he demanded. "Because I don’t recognize myself anymore. I’m losing my mind, Nicholas. Zev is losing his mind. We feel her leaving and every instinct we have is screaming at us to stop it, and you’re asking me to just... let her go?"
