Chapter 85: Not a Monster
"Oh?" Elder Qin raised an eyebrow. "Eager for combat?"
"I am eager," Wangchen replied, the ice around him cracking violently, "to finish the tournament quickly. So I can go pick up my luggage."
He was going to win this tournament in record time.
And then, he was going to take Lin Ji’an away, where no princesses, no white lotuses, and absolutely no water fights could ever reach him again.
***
The changing of the guard at the Luminous Jade River was a masterclass in awkward, hyper-vigilant choreography.
Princess Zhao Ling’er, Su Wan, and Liu Liu emerged from the glowing aquamarine water looking entirely revitalized.
The spiritual Qi of the river had washed away not only the physical grime of the Lower Realm but also the heavy, oppressive exhaustion of their near-death experiences.
Ling’er’s ankle, while still tender, was no longer throbbing with agonizing pain.
Lin Ji’an, who had maintained her stoic, rock-solid vigil facing the forest the entire time, finally hopped down from her boulder.
"Alright, ladies," Ji’an announced, keeping her eyes respectfully averted as the girls hastily pulled their outer robes over their damp inner garments. "The fire is stoked, and there’s a second batch of serpent broth keeping warm. Go dry off. Tang Bo and other disciples, come forward, it’s your turn. Don’t drown. I don’t know how to give people CPR."
It’s not that she didn’t know, but that she didn’t want to!
"Finally!" Tang Bo cheered. He didn’t even wait to reach the water’s edge. He began unfastening his sash while he was still running, shedding his gray Outer Sect uniform like a snake shedding its skin. "Cannonbaaaaaall!"
He hit the water with a spectacular, graceless belly flop that sent a wave of glowing blue water crashing onto the riverbank.
The Class 6 disciples, eager to wash off the stench of fear and sweat, followed suit, stripping down to their trousers and wading into the spiritual currents with groans of profound relief.
"Boss! Get in here!" Tang Bo shouted, treading water and waving frantically at the shore. "The water feels like a warm hug! It’s amazing! Come wash the snake guts off!"
Ji’an stood on the dry stones of the riverbank, her arms crossed over her chest.
Get into the water? With five teenage boys?
While wearing the Yin-Yang Void Locket that projected a male physique, did it absolutely nothing to alter her actual, physical anatomy under her wet clothes?
"I think I’ll pass, Tang Bo," Ji’an called back, picking up her Black Iron Spatula and using it to casually poke the campfire. "I prefer my baths without a side of splashing and unnecessary horseplay. Besides, someone has to keep an eye on the perimeter. The beasts in this realm don’t care if you’re naked; they just see peeled shrimp."
"Aw, come on! Are you shy, Boss?" Tang Bo teased, splashing water at one of the guards. "We’re all brothers here! We won’t judge if you lack muscle!"
If Tang Bo had any idea of the absolute riot Ji’an’s back muscles had caused in the outside world an hour ago, he would have swallowed his tongue.
"I already bathed at the waterfall earlier," Ji’an lied smoothly, flashing a sharp, warning grin. "If you keep yapping, Tang Bo, I’m putting you on dish duty for the rest of the week."
That shut Tang Bo up instantly. The boys returned to their boisterous splashing, wrestling in the shallows like overgrown golden retrievers.
Ji’an sat down on a smooth log near the fire, pulling out a whetstone to sharpen her boning knife.
She kept one eye on the dark, looming cliff face that bordered the eastern side of the river, and the other eye on the boys.
It was peaceful and quiet around them except for the boys hollering in the river, like the calm before the storm.
And naturally, because Lin Ji’an’s life was a magnet for the plot, the peace lasted for exactly four minutes.
Ji’an’s heightened Five-Grain Constitution senses picked it up first.
It wasn’t a roar, the heavy, thudding footfalls of a beast. Then came the faint, sharp whistle of air being displaced at high velocity, coming from directly above.
Ji’an whipped her head up, her eyes tracking the sheer face of the cliff that towered seventy feet above the river.
A shadow detached itself from the edge of the precipice.
It plummeted downward, silhouetted against the moonlight. It was a human figure, falling completely silently, robes fluttering wildly in the rushing wind.
"Incoming!" Ji’an barked, leaping to her feet. "Look out below!"
Tang Bo and the guards, who were currently in the middle of a splashing war, froze, looking up just in time to see the shadow hurtling toward them.
SPLASH!
The impact was massive.
A geyser of glowing blue river water erupted thirty feet into the air, soaking the surrounding willow trees and completely drenching Tang Bo, who had been floating just three feet away from the impact zone.
"What the hell?!" Tang Bo shrieked, scrambling backward in the water, his arms flailing. "Is it a drop-bear?! Did a monster just fall on us?!"
The Class 6 disciples instantly dropped their playful demeanor, panic seizing them as they blindly searched the churning water for a threat.
On the shore, Ji’an’s grip on her spatula tightened. Her muscles coiled, ready to launch forward to drag her idiot teammates out of the water if a mutated crocodile emerged from the depths.
But the water settled as the glowing ripples smoothed out.
And then, a head broke the surface.
It wasn’t a monster.
He rose from the water with a slow, deliberate grace that completely contradicted the fact that he had just fallen seventy feet off a cliff.
Willow-green robes, now soaked and clinging tightly to his frame, outlined a lithe, incredibly toned physique.
He ran a pale, elegant hand through his wet, wavy dark hair, pushing it back from his forehead to reveal a face that was, objectively, a masterpiece of divine architecture.
His eyes, a warm, liquid amber, fluttered open.
