Chapter 50: The Game Is Long But The Nights Are Cold
ADRIEN’S POV
The drive home is silent.
It’s not the comfortable sort of silence or the quiet companionship that occasionally settles between Orion and me when neither of us feels particularly conversational.
No, this silence is sharp and heavy.
From the moment we leave the restaurant it presses against my skin like a physical thing.
Oriok drives with one hand resting lazily against the steering wheel, the other drumming an absent rhythm against his thigh. Streetlights flash across his face, illuminating the angles of his profile before plunging him back into darkness.
He doesn’t ask why I’ve gone quiet, and I don’t volunteer an explanation.
Outside, the city streaks past in blurred streaks of light and color. Inside the car, my thoughts are a disaster.
’After Orion eventually sleeps with you, I’ll make sure he learns what you used to do after you ran away.’
I stare blankly through the passenger window. My reflection stares back. I look too pale. My features are contorted in a mix of tension and fear.
I hate it.
I hate that Louise managed to do that to me. I hate that a few chosen words were enough to crack open things I’d spent years burying.
Most of all, I hate that I’m still thinking about it. What a creature of hate I am.
Louise isn’t the type to bluff. She’s cruel, manipulative, and utterly insufferable, but she isn’t stupid. If she claims to know something, then she probably does.
What makes my gut twist is how much she might know.
Did she find out through rumors? Did she hire people? Did she track down the people I worked with? Does she know the names of my...customers?
I swallow hard.
Unbidden, another thought creeps in. A worse one.
What if Orion already knows?
The possibility strikes so suddenly that I jerk slightly in my seat. I glance sideways, hoping to catalogue his reaction, but Orion notices immediately.
"Is there something on my face, duckling?"
"No," I reply, voice hoarse.
"Hm." He hums, but doesn’t press.
I almost wish he would because then I’d know. Instead, he simply returns his attention to the road, expression unreadable.
My thoughts spiral. What if he knows?
What if Louise isn’t threatening to reveal anything because there’s nothing left to reveal? What if Orion already found out everything months ago?
People like him investigate everyone— especially those they have an interest in. Powerful families survive because they collect information on secrets and weaknesses.
I know that...so, why would I be different?
Maybe he already knows what I did. Maybe he knows every filthy, humiliating detail. Maybe—
Maybe that’s why he asked.
’Sleep with me, Adrien.’
My face burns. I look away from him immediately. I don’t want to look at him any longer.
Maybe this is it. Maybe Orion has finally decided that since everyone else has already had a turn, he can have one too.
Maybe his curiosity has finally outweighed whatever restraint he has. Maybe he looked into my past and thought— well, if he’s done it for strangers, then he’ll have no problem doing it for me.
The thought makes something ugly twist in my chest, because it sounds plausible, and I don’t even know if it’s true.
Some small, horrible part of me wonders whether it would matter if it is.
I squeeze my hands tighter.
I was seventeen when I ran. Seventeen and bloody terrified. The memories come without invitation, rushing against my skull like a rising tide.
The nights were cold and my stomach was almost always empty. I slept on park benches and in alleyways, fear being my only constant companion.
Running away from that pedophilic bastard wasn’t easy. Staying off his radar was even harder, because the bastard had taken a liking to me.
A liking to the way I choked on his dick no doubt.
I’d left the same way he found me, with no money, no qualifications, and no one willing to help me.
Finding food and shelter had been difficult, if not nearly impossible. But finding legal work as a frightened runaway teenager with no documents or references?
Impossible.
I remember the hunger most vividly. Real hunger. The kind of hunger that hurts and makes your hands shake. The kind that strips away dignity piece by piece until survival becomes more important than pride.
I hated every single second of it. I hated both the men and women. I hated their hands and their smiles. I hated the feeling of leaving pieces of myself behind every time.
But hunger is immensely persuasive, so is winter, and so is sleeping outside in the bone-chilling cold while hungry. Eventually, surviving became more important than hating myself.
I survived. That’s all.
Yet even now, shame still clings stubbornly to those memories. Because surviving had cost me. And some things, once sold, never truly feel like they belong to you again.
"Adrien."
It feels like I blinked for a second and the car stopped. I hadn’t even noticed we had gotten home— to Orion’s house, I mean.
Orion, who is watching me too closely.
"You’re thinking very loudly," he says.
"I wasn’t aware that thoughts made noise."
"Yours do."
I unbuckle my seatbelt before he can continue. "Then, I must be exceptionally talented."
I climb out before he can respond. I walk ahead towards the house, feeling the coolness of the night air on my skin.
Orion follows.
The silence between us stretches all the way through the foyer, up the staircase, and down the corridor leading to our rooms.
I can feel him behind me the entire time— a large and dangerous presence.
By the time I reach the door of the bedroom allocated to me, exhaustion has seeped deep into my bones. I just want tonight to end.
I reach for the door handle, freezing as a large hand closes around my wrist.
Slowly, I turn. Orion, the sneaky bastard, stands too close. I didn’t even hear the fucker approach me.
"When exactly," he asks lightly, "were you planning on giving me my kiss?"
I stare at him. "...What?"
"You kissed him." I can’t tell if this is an accusation or not.
I blink. "Who? Who the fuck did I lock lips with?"
He points at himself. "Me."
My eye twitches. "Narrow things down a bit for me, would you?"
"You kissed me." He leans down, trapping me against the door. "But you kissed the other version of me."
I stare. Then stare harder. What fuckery is this?
"Are you jealous of yourself? Is that what this is?"
"I am merely recounting an injustice that has been committed against me." This bastard’s lip just twitched.
Oh, he finds this funny?
"You’re fucking insane."
"Undoubtedly." He sounds pleased by the diagnosis.
I attempt to pull my wrist free. He doesn’t let go. "Let me go, Orion."
"You kissed him without hesitation," he huffs at me.
"He-You knew why I did it!" This shit is frustrating. "I was trying to change the topic, remember?"
"But he still received a kiss."
I slap his chest, hoping to smack some sense into him. "You are him."
"No," Orion says thoughtfully. "I’m significantly more charming than he’ll ever be."
Despite myself, I laugh. The sound escapes before I can stop it. His expression changes immediately. It softens as something warm unfurls in his eyes.
My laughter dies.
Suddenly, we are standing too close. Way too close. I become acutely aware of his hand around my wrist, the largeness of it, and the heat radiating from his palm.
I take a step back. He matches it with one of his own.
"That’s hardly fair," he murmurs.
"What isn’t fair, Orion?" I ask, trying and failing not to look how I feel— like a cornered rabbit.
"You kissed him."
"Are we seriously still talking about that?"
"Naturally." He says flatly. "I still haven’t gotten my kiss."
I shake my head. "Fine. If it will stop you from whining— "
I lean forward with every intention of pressing a quick and entirely chaste kiss against his cheek, but I never make it.
The second I move, Orion’s free hand slides around my waist. Then suddenly, I’m being pulled forward, and his mouth captures mine.
The kiss is nothing like the one I’d given clear-headed Orion. That kiss had been soft and gentle, but this one is the farthest thing from that.
The one kissing me now is manic Orion, and this kiss is so overwhelmingly possessive, it feels like I’m being devoured.
This bastard barely touched his dinner, that must be why he’s so hungry.
My breath catches with each sweep of his tongue. His hands tighten against my waist like he’s afraid I’ll disappear.
The force of it steals every coherent thought from my head. I know that I should push him away. Even if I won’t be able to, I should still try.
But then my mind starts moving a mile a minute and I can’t help but think of all the benefits this kiss might bring to me.
All I have to do is just let him.
Orion is powerful. He’ll never have to create plans around every encounter just to survive. He’ll never understand just how viscerally terrifying it is for me to be in his presence after everything.
He’s akin to a leader of the one percent of the elites, and I’m a retired whore. I’m not the same person I was back then, and it’s high time I start putting my brain to work again.
So, I’ll let him kiss me now, and in exchange, I’ll get my payout later.
