Yujin should have denied it immediately, but for a moment he was flustered and missed the timing. Watching his eyes darting back and forth, Winston spoke casually.
“I was joking, don’t worry about it.”
Though it was clearly no joke.
Yujin thought this inwardly but wisely kept silent. Still, he couldn’t help the blush spreading across his face.
“This is the first Christmas like this... Angie is just really excited.”
Feeling the heat in his cheeks, he offered that excuse. But it wasn’t enough. After all, it was thanks to Winston’s effort that they were experiencing such a special Christmas, and Yujin felt a bit guilty about how harsh they’d been.
“...Thank you for today.”
Yujin muttered softly, averting his gaze. Since when had it become so difficult to speak honestly? He sighed shortly and pictured his daughter’s face.
Among the mountain of presents, the thing Angela liked best was undoubtedly the “Princess Set.” Named by Angela herself, it was exactly the dress, tiara, shoes, and all the fashion the heroine wore on screen or in pictures. The child, dressed head to toe in sparkling, extravagant clothes and accessories, refused to take them off all day long. Whether at meals or going outside the mansion, it was the same. As if anticipating this, one of the gifts was a coat the princesses might have worn in winter long ago, and Angela happily put it on to go see the horses.
After spending the day in a dreamlike excitement, Angela only took off the “Princess Set” when going to sleep. She stubbornly insisted on sleeping as she was, but when Yujin quickly pulled out the princess pajamas Santa had brought, Angela gave in happily and changed.
Thinking about how happy the child had been, Yujin felt grateful to Winston without even realizing it. He lowered his gaze, and Winston answered indifferently as usual.
“As long as she liked it, don’t worry about it.”
That was all. Yujin stared at him quietly for a moment. Why was it that, though Winston’s expression was no different than usual, it seemed utterly hollow to Yujin? What had he been thinking while watching Angela and Yujin all day, isolated in their little world?
Yujin tried to recall Winston’s expression while watching them but couldn’t. Of course — he had been completely focused on his daughter. As a vague unease rose, a sweet scent suddenly wafted. Yujin blinked in surprise.
Perhaps conscious of Angela, Winston had been suppressing his pheromones the whole time, but now it was different. The faint scent of pheromones made his heart race wildly and sweat soak his palms. It was too early for the suppressant’s effect to wear off. Maybe his heat cycle was near. He couldn’t postpone it any longer. Like instinct, a thought came to mind: What if right now I...
“Yujin?”
Suddenly Winston called his name. Yujin hurriedly gathered himself and changed the subject.
“Why did you want to do all this? Is this how you usually do Christmas?”
I’m okay for now. Forcing himself to ignore his pounding heart, he asked casually. Winston chuckled.
“Of course not.”
Pouring a drink naturally into his glass, he continued.
“Angie said she’d never gotten a proper Christmas present before, so I just prepared this.”
“You did all this for Angie?”
Yujin’s voice rose slightly with tension, but Winston misunderstood his tone. With a frown like What’s the problem? Yujin cleared his throat quickly and continued.
“It must have taken a lot of time to prepare... even Santa and all.”
“It’s not that hard if you have the money.”
Winston answered readily again. Hearing this, an image formed clearly in Yujin’s mind. He must have heard what Yujin ordered as Angela’s Christmas gifts. Based on that, Winston prepared the presents and became Santa. To avoid suspicion, he must have deliberately made it visible to the child...
“You really tried hard. I’ll give you credit.”
Winston paused. Seeing his speechless, stunned face, Yujin deliberately joked to hide his true feelings.
“You’re a good kid, so Santa will come to you next year too.”
Trying to smile, Winston twisted the corner of his mouth and shook his head. Without a word, he refilled his glass and spoke,
“It wasn’t difficult at all. I just read Angela’s letter and did exactly what she asked.”
Yujin had heard from the child herself that Angela wrote a letter to Santa. He never imagined it would lead to this outcome. Winston muttered to himself while Yujin remained silent.
“It’s a good thing—wishing happiness for each other.”
He put down his emptied glass and added casually,
“It’s a beautiful thing, too.”
There was no emotion in Winston’s voice, but that only made Yujin’s heart heavier.
“...Then what about you?”
Yujin slowly spoke. Knowing what he was going to say, he couldn’t stop himself. Without will to hold back, the words slipped past his lips.
“Who wishes for your happiness?”
Winston stopped moving and looked at Yujin’s face.
For a while, the two just watched each other silently. Yujin braced himself for the sarcasm he expected. As before, they would undoubtedly insult each other, turn their backs, and fall asleep. Just as he felt like watching a predictable movie whose ending he already knew, Winston finally spoke.
“I’ll take care of that myself.”
...Huh?
Surprised, Yujin blinked. What was this? Had this man’s heart softened in the Christmas spirit? Curious, Yujin caught sight of Winston’s profile.
He looked away from Yujin, gazing out the window. His sharply defined profile was flawless, with no flaws to be found. His neatly combed hair and comfortable sweater gave the relaxed appearance of a man who had wealth and fame, but still Yujin sensed deep sadness and loneliness.
He’s got it all, but no one to share it with.
Suddenly, Yujin recalled something Harold once said. It was when Harold cared for him like a child, and Yujin looked up to Harold like a father. He had once forgotten a rare moment when Harold showed his true feelings. But why did that memory come back now?
This man is alone, too.
Like Harold, or maybe even deeper in loneliness, Winston was sinking. Yujin still had Angela, but this man had no one. Thinking that, the walls remaining in Yujin’s heart crumbled.
Yujin took a step toward Winston. He knew exactly what he was about to do. Still, he didn’t stop. Silently swallowing the carpet and footsteps, Winston didn’t notice his movement. Perhaps he was lost in deep thought. Either way, it didn’t matter to Yujin.
It’s the heat cycle.
Beyond the somewhat hazy consciousness, he {N•o•v•e•l•i•g•h•t} vaguely remembered. That was the only reasonable explanation. That his heart had weakened like this, that he was doing this, was all because the heat cycle had come. No other reason.
I never loved this man, nor pity him.
When he gently grabbed Winston’s loosely hanging fingers, Winston was startled and turned to face him. Seeing his wide eyes, Yujin realized this man had been elsewhere mentally. A cynical smile spread on Yujin’s face with a tinge of resentment.
Tomorrow everything will be over anyway.
Thinking so, Yujin took Winston’s cheek and gently pulled him closer. Winston was still surprised but didn’t resist. Confused? Yujin no longer thought anything else and closed his eyes. When their lips met, all thoughts disappeared, and Winston pulled him strongly into an embrace.
Ah, a sigh escaped unconsciously but quickly vanished inside their mouths. Seizing the moment, Winston wildly pushed his tongue in. The hands holding his cheek slid to his neck, pulling him tightly. At the same time, his stomach clenched painfully, and his heart started pounding madly.
