Episode 296
The older the being, the less straightforward they seemed to be. It was the same for both Ymir and the Martial God. Thinking about it, people like Dean Alderson, Lise Ladygoth, and the Seven-Colored Archmage Assad were like that as well. I wondered if the older one got, the more one preferred a roundabout way of speaking.
If this was a place where time slowed down, then Ymir should have said so. What was with the blurring the boundaries nonsense?
Tick.
The watch was in my pocket, but the ticking of the second hand was strangely clear in my ears. That meant it could pierce through the snowstorm raging on all sides. Maybe that was one of the effects of the divine relic.
I kept walking, exhaling while constantly thinking. I had to walk for 7,200 minutes, 120 hours, 5 days.
Would I be able to fully survive this winter for five days? This wasn't a situation where I could relax. Ymir's statement that I had to risk my life weren't exaggerated.
I couldn't help laughing. Seriously, what did he usually eat for his stomach to look like this?
I had to last five days in the current situation.
I let out a cold breath. It seemed that even my lungs were frozen, so my breath was cold. I was freezing, my mind was sluggish, my body was heavy, and my steps were even heavier.
Still, I didn't stop moving forward. I had to.
***
The moment this turned into a long trek, the thing I had to pay attention to the most was my stamina. Thankfully, the rubble of the broken village was scattered all around me. I was just barely able to find a place to rest. Even a collapsed building could block the snowstorm well enough.
Every time my stamina dropped below half, I immediately looked around. If there was an intact building, I would rest and warm up there.
I soaked the prepared firewood with oil and lit a fire. Then I took out an energy bar and started chewing it out of habit.
Crunch.
It felt harder than stone. It was a hard energy bar to begin with, but it seemed to be several times harder due to the very cold weather.
I had no better option, so I toasted the energy bar over the campfire. It definitely wasn't the right way to eat it, but my teeth would break first if I didn't do that.
Nevertheless, I could see why heroes valued this tasteless energy bar so much. It was easy to eat, the size was right, and it was good for replenishing calories.
Still, eating one a day as Ramon had said wasn't enough. Perhaps it was to be expected, though. Maybe it would be manageable if I was sitting still, but constantly moving in this kind of cold meant I would naturally burn through calories faster.
It was essential to replenish energy in this situation, so I couldn't save the energy bar. Ramon's decision to pack more than strictly needed had been correct.
However, that wasn't the only problem.
Swoooosh—!
On the second day, the wind and cold snow became more intense. There was real weight behind the snowstorm now. It felt like a sandstorm in the north. It exceeded the level where I could endure it with my pure physical ability, and I was forced to use my internal energy.
Crackle.
I circulated my internal energy using the First Fire Technique, conserving my body heat as much as possible. It was a simple cycle, so the consumption wasn't large. The real issue was that I had very limited means to replenish any lost energy.
I wondered how long I could keep this up. I didn't want to think about time, but I had no choice since I was just walking endlessly. I roughly estimated how much internal energy I had left and how much I was using.
I can last two days. Perhaps three days if I save as much as possible.
Would I be able to reach the end of winter in three days? I didn't know. All I could do now was move forward.
***
How much a human could walk in a day depended on age, health status, and athletic ability, but I thought it was around thirty to fifty kilometers on average.
The snowstorm slowed me down even more, so I had to assume it was less than half of that. That meant it would be around twenty kilometers a day. If so, this was the third day, and that meant I had walked at least sixty kilometers.
For some reason, I felt like I'd had similar thoughts in the past. It was back during the first regression, when I was given a task by my fourth senior brother. At least back then, I was able to know my progress thanks to the strange helper called FAD. Now I didn't know how far I had walked or how long I had left.
I was still surrounded by the white darkness, and the scenery of buildings buried in snow hadn't changed. Still, there was no way I was lost. Even in the cold, I didn't forget to occasionally check the compass.
That evening—well, calling it evening felt a bit strange, since the surroundings didn't get darker and there weren't any noticeable changes—my internal energy finally started to run out.
My body lost fuel and quickly became cold and sluggish. Due to that, my steps slowed down even more. The biting cold tore at my entire body. The skin on my face, the only exposed part of my body, felt like it was experiencing tearing pain every moment.
In the midst of the snowstorm, I couldn't stop breathing. So every time I inhaled, my airways hurt like I had swallowed razor blades.
As a result, I was forced to take a break more often. I walked for thirty minutes and rested for thirty. If not for that, I would've collapsed a long time ago.
Crackle!
I squeezed out the last of my internal energy to light a fire. It was time to rest my eyes, even if it was just for a moment. This could very well be my last break. I didn't have much stamina left, and I didn't have the means to start another fire. With that thought, I leaned against the wall and closed my eyes for a while.
When I opened my eyes again, I realized that I'd almost frozen. The campfire had gone out faster than expected, probably due to the strong wind that blew through the building.
I forced my frozen body to move and warm up. My body was protesting for more rest, but I couldn't afford it. Looking at the time, this was already the fourth day.
Rustle.
I took out the last half energy bar from my bag.
I have to eat sparingly. I'd already had that thought many times, pushing myself to the point where I couldn't go without eating any longer. My internal energy was drained and I wouldn't have the strength to hold on if I didn't eat anything.
I put the energy bar in my mouth and forced my stiff jaw to chew. My tongue was numb, so I couldn't taste it any longer. Every time I swallowed, it was painful due to my dry throat, but I forced myself to smile.
Gulp.
I had just woken up, but I already felt sleepy. Ironically, this was the warmest I had ever felt. It was a strange kind of warmth that came from fatigue. The problem was that I would die if I slept.
I started walking again in order to wake up. My big toenail throbbed like it was going to be ripped off. I even wondered if it had actually fallen off.
—Why don't you have a quick nap?
I heard a voice in my mind. It made me wonder if I was going crazy. I remembered a time when I'd heard similar auditory hallucinations on Spirit Mountain.
Once humans were pushed to their limits, did visual and auditory hallucinations start appearing? Or was there something particularly wrong with my mind?
The teasing voice continued.
—You have enough time for a quick nap. It has been four days now. There are still forty hours left. It would be like taking one step back to move forward. Just close your eyes for a moment.
I wondered why this auditory hallucination always said the same thing to me. Didn't it have any creativity?
I remembered my time on Spirit Mountain again. Maybe this place was already Spirit Mountain. I could have died halfway through, been taken to Spirit Mountain, and had to spend one hundred days here.
In any case, despite wondering if I was losing my mind, I found myself responding to the auditory hallucination.
I can't even start a fire any longer. The firewood is used up and my internal energy is drained. If I sleep in this weather, I'll just die.
—There is nothing wrong with that. You can go back to the past. Don't you know? You can go back to the past at exactly the point in time you want.
You know that death isn't the condition for activating the blessing.
—How can you be so sure? You know nothing about your blessing. Hey. You don't think this place is your end, do you? Huh?
I didn't respond any longer. I no longer had the energy to argue even in my mind. The hallucination talked a few more times before losing interest and fading away.
After that, I regretted it. It was better to have those auditory hallucinations than silence. All I could hear was the snowstorm around me. Fatigue and drowsiness once again overwhelmed me.
Cold, hunger, and drowsiness were the three most difficult things for a person to endure. All three kept pressing on me, but I kept moving forward.
***
Once a person truly reached their limit, it seemed that the mind stopped working properly. I was in a daze with foggy thoughts, and my brain only gave instinctive commands: Rest. Sleep. Eat.
Every time, I forced myself to think about anything else. It might've been better if I had someone to talk to, but I couldn't even hear the auditory hallucinations anymore. I was forced to ask myself questions and answer them alone.
Was I getting used to being hungry? I didn't know, but looking back now, that didn't seem to be the case. Before even a full day had passed, my mind was already dizzy from hunger. Well, I had been hungry even before eating the energy bar.
Kukuku.
Had I been too arrogant? Had I, Luan Badniker, treated things too much like a game?
I'd had access to the training on Spirit Mountain, the blessing that could rewind the past, and the aid from my fourth senior brother in moments of crisis. After experiencing the regression at the training camp, the sense of urgency in my heart must've gradually faded.
Between the disaster that happened at the academy, the appearance of the bloody moon, and Hadenaihar—even in those nightmares, no one died. So I must have started assuming everything would go fine.
Did I mistakenly start believing that after being recognized as a hero in the Hero Society, I had truly become one?
I should've known how pathetic I was. I was so messed up. How was I any different from the old loser Luan?
If a person was weak and pathetic, they ought to at least be cautious. So why wasn't I more careful when attacking the priest? I should've at least reconsidered once, twice, or even three times.
Before I could continue my thoughts, I collapsed on the snowfield. I didn't even trip over anything. I just lost strength in my legs.
What?
I tried to stand up again, but my legs didn't listen to me. I realized that my body had already exceeded its limits.
"Hah..."
I had no internal energy or strength left, so my body was just buried in the snow and slowly turned cold. My consciousness blurred and I felt a sense of loss.
After everything I learned, even mastering the First Fire Technique, was I going to die by freezing to death? What kind of expression would Bai Luguang make if he found out about such a pathetic end?
"Huu..." I exhaled, trying to summon warmth. I focused on my dantian, but the only thing I could feel was overwhelming emptiness. Nothing changed.
It was a true crisis. My body lying in the snowfield no longer felt the cold.
Just a little bit.
Even one handful would be enough. Something small, even a match flame smaller than a fingernail, would be fine as long as it gave some warmth.
Matches. I looked up in a daze as the thought suddenly crossed my mind.
I gritted my teeth, twisted my shoulders like an earthworm, and forced my body deeper into the snow. I'd once heard that when a snow storm was raging like this, it was actually warmer beneath the snow. At the very least, the wind wouldn't reach all the way into the ground.
Once I thought my body was half-buried, I made sure I had enough space to move my arms under the snow and took out my bag. It was a narrow space, so it took a long time to take anything out. I didn't have time to take items out one by one either, so I turned it over and the contents spilled out.
A past conversation I had with Ramon crossed my mind.
"Then let's check the supplies. A compass, an hourglass, a bag of salt, disinfectant, bandages, oil, rope, matches..."
I'd thought the matches would be useless. I had listened to Ramon, but truthfully, I was only pretending to respect my senior's words. I hadn't thought it would actually be helpful.
That wasn't the case. None of Ramon's belongings were useless. I grabbed my hungry stomach and regretted not putting in just one more energy bar.
"I've packed them all. By the way, I can create a fire on my own, you know."
"I know, but bring them anyway. Matches aren't that heavy."
A matchbox was among the spilled items. I picked it up with trembling hands. Then I took out a match and struck it.
Scratch, scratch.
I had no strength left in my hands. The sensation was light as if I was wearing several layers of gloves. I even broke a few matches.
Crackle!
In the end, a small fire finally appeared amid the cold. It was a trivial flame that could be extinguished at any moment.
A lump rose in my throat. My vision became blurry as if mist had spread in my eyes. I was sucked into the warmth emitted by this small flame and felt like I was about to lose consciousness.
Then in spite of my faint consciousness and blurred vision, I suddenly felt someone's presence. He had a big nose, elongated eyes, familiar eyes and wore ragged clothes.
On the other side of the match flame, Ramon stood there, shimmering like a mirage.
"Young Master."
"Yes."
In the vision, Ramon smiled and said to me, "Matches. Aren't you glad you brought them?"
"Yes."
I nodded and wrapped the match in my fist. My frozen palm soon extinguished it, but the warmth didn't disappear. I still held it in my fist and pulled it to my chest.
Ba-dum!
The warmth that started from my heart soon became a spark. It was as if the circulatory system in my body had become a fuse. The heat that rose from deep within, not the outside, grew in an instant and melted my body that had been frozen stiff.
My skinny body, devoid of strength or energy, looked like a withered old tree that was completely drained of energy. Just like a tree, I erupted into flames the moment I touched the smallest spark of fire.
As my whole body was suddenly filled to the brim with energy, I finally understood the concept of innate true energy and vitality.
At the same time, my understanding of the First Fire Technique started to change. I had proudly thought that I understood this martial art on a level close to perfection, but in fact, I had only skimmed the surface.
The true nature of fire, which I hadn't realized even after gazing at the sun for a thousand days, was something I finally understood in this bitter cold.
I exhaled the cold air that had filled my lungs and muttered, "It is warm."
It had been a long time since I last spoke. A hoarse and cracked voice came from my throat.
I was no longer cold. The match flame had gone out, but the fire still burned in my chest and around my fists.
I managed to stand up. I straightened my back, faced myself, and muttered once more, "It is warm, Senior."
