Chapter 303: Chapter 303: Empathy
Mu Yunniang held a needlework basket in one hand and tucked a stray lock of hair behind her ear with the other, somewhat shyly saying, "Meng Niang, I, I’ve come to you for some needlework."
Yi Meng quickly patted the heated brick bed and invited, "Come on up. On a rainy day like this, there’s nothing else to do but needlework. It’s just as well you’ve come over, third sister-in-law, otherwise I’d find doing needlework alone quite boring."
Whether or not these were mere courtesies, they made people feel warm inside just hearing them.
Mu Yunniang truly envied her fourth sister-in-law. She’s good-looking, educated, knows a lot, and most importantly, is articulate.
Unlike herself, who speaks as awkwardly as a gourd, never able to express what’s on her mind.
Mu Yunniang sat across from Yi Meng and took out her own needlework.
The family lacked for nothing in terms of candles now, and mother-in-law wouldn’t begrudge the expense, so no one’s forbidden from lighting candles in their rooms.
However, Mu Yunniang had always been frugal, reluctant to light candles during the day and only keeping them lit as briefly as possible at night.
Now, entering the room of her fourth sister-in-law, she saw it was brightly lit with candles, making not only the room but her mood much brighter compared to her own room.
The two worked on their needlework, occasionally chatting, but it was always Yi Meng who initiated the conversation, to which Mu Yunniang would respond once or twice.
Yi Meng knew her third sister-in-law’s nature—quiet, honest—and if she didn’t bring up topics, the woman would likely stay silent the whole visit.
Moreover, Yi Meng also knew Mu Yunniang wasn’t one to wander into others’ rooms casually; her needlework visit must have an ulterior motive.
So, Yi Meng picked a lot of topics to talk about.
Sometimes it was about work in the fields, sometimes about the town shops, and sometimes it shifted to the chickens, ducks, pigs, and horses at home.
All topics were met with simple responses, with no further development from the other side, so Yi Meng realized she hadn’t yet hit on the issue.
However, apart from these topics, Yi Meng couldn’t immediately think of something new to discuss.
Just then, Xiao Shiyi let out a soft whimper, and Yi Meng quickly patted the little one’s back. Seeing the child just whimpered a bit before falling back asleep, Yi Meng no longer needed to find a topic as Mu Yunniang couldn’t help but remark:
"Meng Niang, these kids of yours are well-behaved, each better than the last."
Yi Meng chuckled, saying, "Well-behaved? Except for this youngest one who can’t cause trouble yet, the rest come back dirty every day."
"That’s still considered sensible."
Mu Yunniang earnestly said, "Meng Niang, truly, they are very sensible."
Seeing her reaction, Yi Meng almost thought Mu Yunniang was praising her own children.
However, she finally grasped the true purpose of her third sister-in-law’s visit; it must be about the children.
Thinking about the two kids in the third household, Qi Wulang was already a half-grown boy, sensible enough to help around the house.
As for Qi Qilang, who was only a few months younger than her own Liulang, he could be considered the most mischievous among the Qi family boys.
And looking at the patchwork Mu Yunniang was doing, the patches could be said to be the most numerous among all the Qi Family clothes.
It was obvious they belonged to Qi Qilang.
"Third sister-in-law, there’s something you don’t understand. Sensible children are good in our eyes, but mischievousness also has its merits."
Yi Meng’s voice was gentle, causing Mu Yunniang to pause in her work, looking up with confusion written on her face, "Mischievousness has merits?"
"Of course!"
Yi Meng laughed, "Mischievous children have many ideas they want to try out. What’s this? It’s a sign of strong hands-on ability!"
"They have ideas and then act on them. Isn’t that an advantage over children who only follow adult instructions without question?"
Yi Meng smiled at Mu Yunniang, her gaze steady and unwavering.
It was precisely this determined look that led Mu Yunniang to instinctively trust Yi Meng’s assertions.
"Is that so? Well, it seems pretty good then."
Mu Yunniang hesitantly asked, "But being mischievous is also problematic. Meng Niang, how do you suggest teaching such mischievous kids?"
"That’s easy. Mischievous children are smart and understand what adults say. As adults, we shouldn’t treat them as mere children but as friends."
Yi Meng resumed sewing clothes with a needle and thread, "Imagine when we were young, our parents and elders forbade us from doing this or that. What did we think? Usually, we obeyed, but in our hearts, we wondered what would happen if we didn’t listen?"
"We were obedient, but only imagined. However, some mischievous kids wouldn’t listen and insisted on going against the grain, often driving adults to furious discipline with brooms or sticks."
Seeing Mu Yunniang listen attentively, Yi Meng continued, "But think about it from another angle. If someone around our age—sisters or friends—told us not to do certain things, even without much explanation, we might feel their words made more sense than our parents’."
"Treat, treat children as friends?"
Mu Yunniang, though awkward and honest, wasn’t foolish. She understood Yi Meng’s point, but imagining being friends with her youngest son felt bizarre.
"But, but Meng Niang, how can we befriend children? Wouldn’t it make them even harder to manage later?"
Mu Yunniang couldn’t figure out how to befriend children.
Yi Meng laughed and shook her head, "Being friends isn’t just superficial; it’s about genuinely considering things from the child’s perspective. We can’t think from the viewpoint of being sixty years old because we aren’t there yet, right? Even thinking won’t help us understand what we’ll be like at that age."
"But we’ve been kids before or interacted with many children. So if we, as adults, practice a little more patience and think more from a child’s viewpoint, that’s how we truly befriend them."
Yi Meng put down her needlework, looking up at Mu Yunniang, "Third sister-in-law, in relationships, empathy is crucial. Understanding things from the other person’s perspective is the best way to comprehend why they act a certain way."
Seeing Mu Yunniang nod in understanding, Yi Meng added, "Of course, empathy isn’t for everyone. We must distinguish whom to consider. For outsiders, those irrelevant to us, we don’t have to bother. We must focus on ourselves, our family, loved ones, and those we care about."
