Chapter 35: WOULD NEVER LET MYSELF REPEAT THAT MISTAKE
Chapter 36
Slowly, the gap between us vanished. Ren reached up, his large, warm hand lifting to touch my face.
The moment his rough fingers brushed against my cheek, a quiet gasp escaped my lips, my eyes widening slightly as a sudden heat rushed straight under my skin.
My breath caught completely in my throat. I leaned into his touch without even realizing it, my cheek pressing into his palm as his fingers curved around my jaw to hold me firmly.
His touch was so grounding, yet it made my entire body feel like it was melting into a puddle.
His thumb rested right against my racing pulse point on my neck. He held my face with a mix of fierce intensity and gentle care, tilting my head up slightly as he leaned down.
I know this was the time to move away, to take a step back and stop whatever was about to happen.
But I was too weak to resist, my heart was beating in a way I’ve never experienced before.
I wanted this. I needed it. Maybe if it happens, we’ll both know what it felt like.
We just wanted to feed our curiosity, to know how it’ll feel. Yes, that was the only reason.
My eyelids grew heavy, finally fluttering shut as I surrendered to the feeling of him.
And then, his lips met mine. Slowly.
It was a soft, lingering brush of our lips but it sent a massive shockwave crashing straight through my entire body.
His grip on my jaw tightened just a fraction, his thumb applying a tiny bit of pressure to tilt my mouth perfectly against his.
He pulled me closer until my chest was pressed flat against his broad frame, deepening the touch.
My mind went completely blank, the rest of the world erasing itself as the warmth of his mouth sent a frantic, beautiful shiver down my spine.
For a second, I forgot about the world. I forgot about Callum, and about the court dates.
There was only the heat of his skin, the firm hold of his hand on my jaw, and the sweet, electric pull of his lips moving gently against mine.
I couldn’t believe I was kissing Ren. I was kissing my best friend’s younger brother and I loved it.
But before the kiss could fully open up into something deeper, he suddenly went rigid.
His lips parted from mine sharply. The sudden movement made me open my eyes, breathless, dazed, and completely disoriented, my lips still tingling and hot from the contact.
His hand dropped from my jaw, his head snapping toward the dusty glass window of the office. His teeth were gritted so tightly that a small, hard muscle was ticking violently in his jaw.
"Neve," he muttered, his deep voice carrying a sharp, panicked edge of disbelief.
My heart instantly stopped, dropping like a stone into a cold, bottomless pit.
I nodded quickly, the warm haze of romance instantly freezing into pure, icy guilt.
I honestly thought he was just pulling away because he had suddenly remembered who we were. Or that he regretted what just happened.
But he wasn’t looking at me to make a moral point. He was staring straight out of the glass.
I slowly turned my head, my legs shaking so badly I could barely stand, and looked past his broad shoulder to follow his gaze out the window. My breath caught in my throat, a suffocating panic slamming into my chest.
A yellow taxi had just pulled into the parking lot. The passenger door swung open, and Neve stepped out onto the road.
She was holding a large umbrella over her head as she handed some cash to the driver.
She was supposed to be outside the states, but she was standing right there in the flesh, adjusting her dress before turning around to walk toward the main entrance of the Reed Building.
A massive wave of pure shock and intense guilt hit me so hard I felt dizzy, my stomach twisting into a painful knot.
I had just kissed her little brother. Panic took over my entire body. I had to cover this up right now.
If Neve walked through those doors and saw the look on our faces, it would ruin the most important relationship I had left.
I quickly pushed against Ren’s chest, putting a wide, forced distance between us.
I grabbed a dirty rag from a nearby cardboard box and began wiping down the top of an already clean desk, my hands shaking so violently I could barely hold the cloth against the wood.
"She’s back," I whispered, my voice trembling with a mix of fear and deep shame as I shot a panicked look at him.
"We need to go greet her. Act normal, Ren. Please, just look normal."
Ren didn’t say a word, but his face locked down into a completely unreadable, hard mask as he bent down and picked up the dropped mop from the floor.
He didn’t look at me, and his silence felt heavy, full of the same sudden realization that had just shattered my world.
I didn’t wait to see if he complied. I threw the rag down, roughly rubbing my burning cheeks with the palms of my hands to try and hide how flushed and guilty I looked.
Forcing a wide, happy smile onto my face, I ran out of the corner office and hurried toward the lobby just as the front glass doors swung open with a loud, echoing creak.
"Neve!" I called out. My voice sounded a little too loud, a little too breathless in the empty space, but I forced myself to look completely thrilled as I ran up to throw my arms around her.
Neve caught me in a tight, warm hug, her umbrella clattering against the concrete floor as she wrapped her arms around my shoulders.
I hugged her back fiercely, burying my face into her shoulder, but the heavy knot of guilt in my stomach only twisted tighter. Holding her felt wrong now. It felt like I was hiding a weapon behind my back while embracing her.
When she finally pulled back to look at me, her kind eyes scanned my face. I could feel how hot my cheeks still were, and my breathing was still a little shallow.
She frowned slightly, her hand reaching up to touch my arm gently. "Lumi, look at you. Your face is so red, and you’re completely out of breath. What are... how did... have you been scrubbing this entire place by yourself? You’re stressing yourself out way too much, honey. Let Ren take care of you just as I would, Lumi. " The mention of Ren made my guilt worse.
"No, I’m... I’m okay," I stammered, my voice a bit uneven as I forced myself to keep the fake smile pasted on my face.
"I’m just so glad to see you. I was just rushing around. But what are... how did you get back so early? You didn’t tell me you were coming."
Neve’s face broke into a huge, bright smile, her eyes filled with genuine, deep happiness.
"Actually, it was because of Ren." I blinked at her surprised. What did she mean? Was he aware she was coming and still kissed me? What was his plan?
"Ren dropped me a message a couple of hours ago. He told me everything you’ve been doing with the building, and he said it would be a really nice time for me to come back and support you. He said you were working so hard." My chest tightened until it felt like it would crack.
Ren was so sweet and he has never done a thing without me at the back of his mind. He’s always trying to make me smile, like my happiness was his only job.
I glanced slightly past her shoulder and saw Ren walking slowly out of the corner office, the mop in his hand, his face a completely unreadable mask.
"He didn’t know I’d be coming back today, though," Neve continued, laughing softly as she shook her head and adjusted her bag.
"The second I saw his text, I couldn’t just sit there. I called my office, sorted out my schedule, and booked the very first flight back here. I wanted to be here for you, Lumi. We aren’t just best friends. We’re sisters. Did you really think I’d let you try to rebuild this entire empire without me?"
Hearing her words felt like a blow straight to my heart.
Every single ounce of warmth from the kiss completely vanished, replaced by a sickening, heavy wave of pure shame.
She had hopped on a plane, dropped her own plans, and rushed across the country just to stand by my side, completely pure and selfless in her love for me.
She considered me a sister. And just two minutes ago, I had been pressed against the wall in a dark office, letting her little brother hold my jaw and kiss my lips.
I felt like an absolute monster. I felt like I had completely betrayed the one person who had saved me when Callum destroyed my life and took my son away.
As Neve turned around to wave at her brother, calling out a cheerful greeting to him, I looked down at my trembling hands.
Right then, a cold, hard resolve washed over me. The confusion was gone. I clamped a heavy lock on my heart and made a silent, unyielding promise to myself.
Never again. What just happened between Ren and me could never, ever happen again.
I would never let myself repeat that mistake, no matter how fast my heart beat around him, and no matter how safe his hands made me feel.
I couldn’t lose Neve. She was my family. I had to bury whatever feelings were growing for Ren deep in the ground and never let them see the light of day again.
"Thank you, Neve," I whispered, forcing my voice to sound strong and clear as I stepped up beside her. "I really needed you."
