Chapter 226: What’s Bothering Dex
- DEX -
Raya is brushing her teeth in the bathroom. I can hear her singing, which I’ve come to discover is something she does as a way of timing how long she’s been brushing. It’s adorable and endearing—one of those cute little quirks that I love.
I can’t decide how to feel about Luciano hooking up with Rory so quickly. Maybe he cares about her and respects her more than he has any other woman, but can this be a good thing so soon? When she was struggling so severely? Is that responsible?
I’m also sick with the possibility that I’ve brought the danger of my mother’s family to what’s supposed to be a happy escape for Raya and I. A getaway. An elopement. I was the one who invited Luciano, and maybe I shouldn’t have. Maybe that was a mistake.
I had to walk away from him this morning before I said something I might regret later. I was tempted to kick his arrogant, selfish ass for not keeping his dick in his pants until she was more emotionally stable. If Rory wasn’t standing inside looking entirely secure and happy and not at all unsure about her circumstances, I might have done just that.
We’ve been here two days, and Luci is already sleeping with Raya’s sister. Couldn’t he give her some fucking time? If he hurts her, I can’t even imagine how much worse it’s going to be for her than it already has been. Rory is dealing with enough as it is.
First, Lawson. That was my fault. I should have seen it coming. Now Luciano. If he proves to be an issue, that is entirely on me, too. I fear that Luci is going to end up getting tired of her and moving on, and Raya and I are going to have to deal with the fallout. That’s what I fear. More trauma that my family is responsible for.
Which makes me reconsider why I invited him. I did want him to keep an eye on Rory. He’s devoted to that mission anyway, and he’s obviously very sincere about it.
And I love my cousin. I love everyone in my family. I’m just not sure I’m prepared for all the shit that potentially comes with embracing them this closely.
I obviously can’t keep us from becoming entangled in whatever mess is going on in the Ricca underworld, and that’s not something I truly considered. What if it’s not just Sunday meals that we start going to? What if it’s a whole mess of dangers like the one that was waiting in Rory’s cabin?
This is exactly why my parents wanted to keep me separate from them. They wanted to keep me separate from the dangers of that life. But maybe it’s too late. And both my parents are gone now anyway.
The reality of my father’s passing hits me all over again. First, my mother. Now my father. Both of the people who brought me into this world are no longer in it. What I’m left with in terms of family is the danger that they tried so hard to keep me from.
"Hey," Raya says brightly, walking out to where I’m leaning against the kitchen island. She senses that something’s wrong immediately, of course, and her smile wilts. "What happened? What’s wrong?"
I turn around, leaning back against the island and drawing her into my arms with an easy smile. There won’t be any hiding these concerns from her, but it feels so much more manageable when I’m able to feel her against me.
She snuggles into me, the scent from her golden hair making me burrow my nose in so I can be surrounded by it. Everything about her is so fresh and new and hopeful. She reminds me of spring. Of a new beginning. I can’t fucking wait until she’s my wife.
Raya groans happily at the embrace but then pulls back so she can look up into my eyes. "Are you going to tell me what’s bothering you?"
I let out a ragged sigh. "Rory stayed the night with Luciano." That’s at least the lesser of the surprises.
Her eyes widen. "Oh."
"Yeah."
"And you’re worried he’s going to hurt her," she says, pulling away so she can lean against the opposite counter to look at me.
"It’s Luciano, so yeah," I shrug at the obviousness of it. "Will he lose interest now that he’s been with her? That’s what I’m worried about. That’s how he typically operates."
Raya wets her lips, pulling them inward at the distress of that thought.
"It won’t happen like that." She shakes her head, willing that possibility away. But whether she actually believes that or is just trying to convince me or herself of it is unclear. "You’ve seen the way they are together. It’s much more than that. For Roar, too. She’s never looked at anyone the way she looks at Luciano."
This consideration passes between us silently until I let out a drawn-out groan. "I hope you’re right."
"Of course I’m right. You know it, too. That’s why you invited him. When that whole thing happened after the funeral..." She gestures in a way that skates over everything unsaid, tucking all the horrifying details into that one vague reference like she’s afraid to say Lawson’s name.
I don’t blame her. Every time I so much as think his name, anger boils inside of me that I’m not sure will ever die. I wish his death would have taken it with him. Instead, I’m left with its eternal flame and the residual guilt that I could have prevented everything that happened that day if I would have killed him sooner.
"That whole thing created a bond between Rory and your cousin. He’s worried something like that will happen to her again. Obviously, I mean... the security system, the guys watching the house, not wanting to let her out of his sight..."
"You’re right," I sigh. "I’m sure that’s why she ended up with him last night, too. Like a trauma bond."
"What do you mean?" Her brow pinches with a frown.
Shit, I should have told her this part first. Now it’s going to seem like I don’t think it’s a big deal.
"Well, I’ll give Luciano this—his paranoia isn’t unfounded. Someone was in Rory’s cabina last night, and now Luci has guys looking for whoever it was and watching over the area."
"What?" Raya pushes off of the counter, terror flickering across her beautiful face.
"Rory is okay," I tell her, lifting my palms instinctually like that proves Raya has nothing to worry about. "I saw her just now. She’s fine, I promise."
"But there was someone in her cabina? Why didn’t they tell us? What happened?"
"She got away. Luciano told me yesterday that he was flying some guys down here. He was worried about how open and exposed the sleeping arrangements are. It sounds like his men got here right in time. Luci even flew a doctor here. A cardiologist."
Her mouth drops open. "What? Are you serious?"
"Yeah. Unbelievable right?"
Her shock morphs into an uneasy grin. "And you think he’s just going to move on after they’ve slept together? If he cares enough to fly a cardiologist down here after what I mentioned about her heart condition... it’s much more than that, Dex. He cares about her... a lot."
"Yeah, he believes he actually loves her, but it’s really fast. And also a touch on the crazy side, don’t you think?"
Raya’s laughter means she doesn’t disagree, but apparently she’s not bothered by it.
"You know who else was really fast?" She asks, gesturing between the two of us with a wry grin.
"That was different," I shrug.
"It was? They’re having dreams, too. Just like we did," she reminds me. "You’ve got to admit that the similarities are too much to be a coincidence."
"Hmm," I grumble, faced with the possibility that I’m being unfair. "My family is just responsible for enough trauma already."
"Rory is a big girl," Raya says. "She can decide who to sleep with and when. And this is the kind of person she needs. Someone who won’t let her get away with acting like she doesn’t need taking care of and instead goes right ahead and takes care of her anyway."
"You think so?" I lean forward and pull her toward me, wrapping her in my arms again.
"Yeah, and Luci was right to be worried if there was actually a danger. The dreams may have been warning them, you know? Who was it in her cabina? Do they know?"
"I’m not sure. I guess Uncle Saul is sending more of his men down here to be safe. Luciano thinks it has something to do with him. Maybe something connected to the family, I don’t know." I press a kiss into her hair. "I’m sorry my family is this way. First my brother..."
"You have to stop blaming yourself," she says, squeezing me in interruption. "It’s not your fault, Dex. You’re the best man I’ve ever known. And I like your family. They’re sweet. And loving. And they’re yours."
"They’re also apparently incredibly dangerous to be around."
"I doubt they’re really that dangerous," she scoffs. "Aside from the giant mansion, they seem pretty normal. And who knows? Maybe this has to do with Rory and I instead."
My stomach twists at the suggestion. God, I hope not.
"I’m going to call Rory. Or do you think it’s okay if I just go over there?" She asks, gently pulling out of my arms again.
"Are you asking me if she was decent? Eh..." My hand wavers back and forth, undecided.
Raya’s eyebrows lift in surprise. "My sister better have been decent if you saw her."
My soft laughter follows her as she goes to fetch her phone.
