Chapter 102: Duty vs. Love
- RAYA -
Dex’s uncle Saul is not at all how I pictured him. He’s nice—when Dex introduces us, he kisses my hand just like Luciano did—but there’s something intensely guarded and maybe even a little dark about him. As soon as the thought crosses my mind, I push it away, feeling guilty.
"My nephew says you work together," Saul says, and I see him notice the stitches in my hair that are pretty difficult to see now unless you are looking for them.
"Yes, that’s right," I smile politely. I half expect him to sit us down and offer us some valuable advice about how to handle the Lawson situation from a legal perspective, but he doesn’t.
"Maybe Alexander can give us some grandchildren to spoil soon. Our kids are not interested, and I’m already feeling like an old man," he chuckles, his attention turning to Luciano and Vanessa who both roll their eyes.
I’m not sure if I should be amused or startled at the implication that Dex and I would be producing these children Saul and Gemma are apparently waiting for. It’s sweet that he would consider Dex’s children their own grandchildren, though. That’s just a testament to how much they love him.
"Luciano will never settle down. There’s too many beautiful women," someone says, which gets a lot of laughs. And Luciano smirks, adjusting his jacket and fixing the sleeves before catching my eye and winking at me.
"He will settle down," Saul says. "He doesn’t have a choice. He will settle down or I will choose a woman for him."
There is more laughter, and Luciano is still smiling, but I can tell there is a bit of tension now that invades his expression. Obviously this is not entirely a joke.
"Our babies are still young. They have time," Gemma says soothingly, and Saul only nods—not taking the issue further.
Dex and I stay a little longer visiting with his family before finally saying our goodbyes to everyone. His Aunt Gemma follows us into the house and packs up a bunch of food for us to take, putting it all in a bag and handing it to Dex.
"Come next Sunday," she says, taking hold of his arms with a desperate, hopeful look. "And then come every Sunday after that."
Dex laughs, those dimples behind his beard becoming visible. "We will make it as often as we can." His use of the word ’we’ gives me that warm, pleasant feeling of being included, despite the surprise that he would automatically fold me so readily into future plans to see his family.
"You wouldn’t tease your Zia would you?" She asks and then turns to me. "Make sure to come, Auraya. Please. We miss him too much. It’s like his mother is gone completely when we don’t even have her beautiful boy here to see either."
I feel it the moment those words impact him. Dex’s smile fades, and he sighs.
"Don’t run away from us again, Alexander," she says, patting the side of his face and then kissing his cheek and pulling him in for a hug.
"Okay, Zia," he mutters, and the tone of his voice makes me ache for all of them.
"It was so wonderful to meet you, Auraya," she says, turning from Dex with teary eyes and embracing me as well.
"It was a lovely evening. Thank you," I tell her.
When Dex and I leave through the front door, the giant mansion looks so much different now than when we entered. It looks like a place where love lives.
"Thank you for coming to this," Dex says once we get in the truck. "Did you have an okay time?"
"It was amazing. Your family is amazing," I smile. "Thank you for bringing me, although I think they are looking much further into the future than we are. I doubt your uncle would be talking about children if he knew how long we have known each other," I laugh softly.
Dex starts the truck. "Much further into the future than we are?" He glances at me with a wry smile. "Maybe much further into the future than you are."
I blink a few times, letting those words sink in.
"I told you I was already wondering if it is too soon to ask you to move in with me," he chuckles. "And it wasn’t all that long ago that this side of my family had arranged marriages for at least some of the children, so committing to someone you just met isn’t exactly strange in their eyes. Those relationships were out of duty to the family rather than love, though."
"Oh." It’s all I can think of to say, because I’m stunned by the possibility that he might actually mean it. Dex might actually see that far into our future... far enough that joking about things like children doesn’t scare him or seem way too soon.
I’m also stunned at the thought that his family recently had arranged marriages. That seems like the kind of thing that only happens in stories—not in real life. Was Saul serious about choosing a woman for Luciano? No wonder Luciano seemed bothered by it.
"Sorry, does that scare you?" Dex asks, grabbing my hand in his. "I’m not asking you to marry me yet, don’t worry." He picks up my hand and kisses it, and my mouth drops open. Marry? Yet?
"I’m not scared," I say quickly, recovering from my surprise before he takes my reaction the wrong way. "Just... surprised. Did your uncle mean it about choosing someone for Luciano?"
"Probably," Dex chuckles, steering us out of the circular drive. "Luciano is a player. He’s always been a player. Which is fine... it’s not looked down upon in the family or anything. But at some point Uncle Saul is going to expect him to get serious."
"Why does that matter to your uncle so much?"
"Luciano will be expected to have a bigger role in representing the family business, and no one is taken as seriously in that group of people unless they have a wife and produce heirs..."
"Heirs?" I repeat. "Weird. That sounds like royalty."
"It does, doesn’t it? It’s a cultural thing I guess," he shrugs.
"Really? A cultural thing?" I frown. "I didn’t realize that was something popular in Italian culture."
"Not anymore," he says vaguely.
"Maybe that has something to do with these letters," I suggest, picking up the tin that we thankfully forgot to take in. "I told your aunt about them when I was on my way to bring them in, and she seemed kind of worried. She told me to leave them in the truck and that she would speak to you about it later."
"So that’s why you didn’t end up getting them. Hmm."
"Yeah, Gemma referred to them as ’secret letters.’"
Dex’s eyes cut to mine before returning to the road.
Street lights illuminate the windshield in equal intervals until we turn out of the neighborhood and enter the country. Here the darkness is allowed to engulf the truck, the headlights only making a modest path through the moonless night. Star light is scattered across the sky like glittering powder that someone carelessly spilled. If that were the cause, it would be a beautiful accident.
"I guess we will have to wait to find out what the letters hold," Dex says quietly.
"Was your grandmother in an arranged marriage?" I ask curiously, imagining this might be some kind of clue as to Gemma’s reaction.
"Yes, I believe she was. But my grandfather died relatively young. It shouldn’t have been a problem if Nonna Etna had someone she was romantic with afterward. But evidently there is much I don’t know."
"It’s always strange to imagine parents and grandparents as having romantic lives before us," I smile. "I always tried to imagine it—my mother and father and how they came to be together, how their relationship was before children. Dad literally never talked about it, and it wasn’t something my Nana gave us details about either. I think even though mom left, Nana was careful not to talk badly about her. It’s weird. It would have been nice to have more of a reason to either hate her or love her. Instead, there’s this hole... an emptiness that I don’t know how to fill. I know how Rory fills it."
Dex looks at me, his gaze lingering. "How does Rory fill it?"
"With a monster."
"That’s fair," he says. "She left you. What mother would do that?"
"But she’s not a monster. Monsters don’t exist. She’s a person with a story. Maybe there are good reasons..."
"There’s no good reason to abandon your children," Dex interrupts. "Much less more than one."
That familiar sadness looms again, and I look at my hands, silently tucking the feeling back into my heart. It’s pointless to go over this topic again. Why did I even bring it up?
"You had a beautiful childhood with two parents who adored you," I say quietly. "I can see how you would only be able to see it that way."
"You deserved that, too," he says, grabbing my hand and squeezing it. "And in your adulthood you’re going to have all the affection and love you didn’t have before. You’re going to be treated like a princess." He picks up my hand and kisses it again, smiling against my skin because he knows I hate that reference. "Whether you like it or not."
