Ooh, you make me live~
You are the reason I live.
Whenever this world is cruel to me~
Whenever this world is cruel to me,
I got you to help me forgive~
Because I have you, I forgive the world.
Ooh, you make me live now, honey~
You are the reason I live, my beloved.
<You’re My Best Friend by Queen>
A recorded narration played over the background music.
A bright, beautiful melody in C major. Yet the narration layered over it rustled, unavoidably grim.
If only one person is keeping him alive, then what happens when that person disappears?
Tick—
The actor hunched on the stage raised his head.
He softly began his monologue.
“Day by day, death approaches. My body is decaying, but my mind is at peace.”
Chills—
Jae Pil’s smile vanished at the first line.
It wasn’t because of the dialogue, but because of his voice. The resonance.
The husky voice became an aura, filling the classroom.
The brightly fluorescent lecture hall suddenly seemed dark.
The image of a dying man reciting a monologue under a single spotlight in the center of a darkened stage came to mind.
“Jim, who stays by my side, and Mary, who visits me every day, make me feel less empty than when I was at my peak.”
The performance of someone nearing death.
It would be easier to play someone struggling and in pain because they didn’t want to die.
Even portraying serene satisfaction amidst severe agony would be easier than most. However...
The calm stoicism born from agonizing pain.
The emotion was too dark to call ‘happiness,’ yet not fearful either, as there was a companion holding his hand in the darkness.
To persuade, with such a voice, the image of a human greeting the end of his life.
La~ Laa~ Laaa~
The BGM gradually swelled, then abruptly stopped.
At the same time, the actor, who had slowly risen, was suddenly filled with vitality.
Jae Pil let out an “ah” in admiration.
It was Freddie as a child.
— Parok? You’re not British. Did you come from the colony?
— Always have good thoughts, do good deeds, and speak good words, according to the teachings of Zoroastrianism.
— Hey, buck teeth. Try closing your mouth. Your teeth are showing.
Narration poured in from the left and right sides of the stage.
With each overlapping line, the boy’s mouth tightened further, and his shoulders hunched more. Rather than being crushed by prejudice, it seemed his self-consciousness was intensifying.
Thump— thump—
Boy Freddie tore across the stage as if unable to contain his energy.
When he moved to the left, he bragged, “I’m a recognized musician,” and when he moved to the right, he sprawled out drunk at a party.
Watching him naturally tie together the chaotic scenes—conversing with nonexistent narrations on stage while staggering about on his own—Jae Pil couldn’t relax his tension.
‘He uses his body very freely. Even if method acting is based on emotion, the acting will be awkward if you can’t use your body properly.’
A lonely, wild momentum exploded from boy Freddie’s entire body.
Wit and aggression.
Inspiration and inferiority.
When all of those aspects reached their peak, a beast-like momentum dominated the stage.
Mary appeared. It was the beginning of Act 2.
“Hello?”
“He...llo.”
Mary simply smiled faintly and walked past.
Everyone couldn’t help but admire her, even in that fleeting moment.
She was a refined and pure woman, to the point that being told “you’re a man” would have felt like an insult. If Jae Pil hadn’t been captivated by Freddie’s acting, he would have been greatly impressed.
Freddie’s eyes followed Mary as she disappeared.
Then she appeared again. This time, as she passed, she exchanged a glance with him. The wavering gaze deepened slightly.
And then for the /N_o_v_e_l_i_g_h_t/ third time. When their gazes met, it was as if the world had stopped.
The cheerful drumbeat blended with the electric guitar. It throbbed like the feeling of first love.
Freddie turned to the left, as if rejecting the right side of his body that was involuntarily turning toward Mary, who was moving farther away.
But as if magnetized, his body slowly turned to the right again.
1— 2— 3—
In just three seconds, his expression blossomed as if he had been reborn.
It was the face of a man falling in love.
However, Jae Pil shuddered for a different reason.
‘What... what was that?!’
The change in expression during those three seconds did not occur just once.
Five times? No, six?
The transitions were so natural that one wouldn’t notice without close attention, yet at the same time, the expressions felt segmented, shifting in distinct steps.
With each expression, Freddie seemed to age by a year, becoming more deeply captivated by her.
And when his body had fully turned to the right...
He had become a full-fledged young man, as if he had aged five years.
‘What should I call this? It’s as if still motions are connected in sequence... yet it’s not awkward. Could it be that those intermittent motions are all highly trained?’
Jae Pil’s guess was correct.
Yoomyeong, who had practiced relentlessly, had finally internalized each still motion that morning and succeeded in connecting them.
Realizing this, Jae Pil stared at him with his mouth slightly open.
Though they didn’t understand the technique, the students couldn’t take their eyes off the captivating performance.
Aside from Ryu Shin, whose face had turned pale with shock, there was one more being that was amazed.
‘Did he really pull it off? In that amount of time...?’
The fox spirit clicked its tongue.
Miho had thought Yoomyeong was talented. It had also thought he was no ordinary person after seeing him utilize 200% of the presence given to him.
But now, Miho realized it. The kid was tenacious.
He barely ate or slept, clinging to the advice given to him.
‘I didn’t think he could actually do it, even as I told him.’
Training unused muscles in just a few days was nearly impossible. It was like asking a toddler to run.
However, that guy used his body extremely well. Despite being suppressed by others’ presence, he had struggled for 15 years to move his body according to his own will. It seemed he had developed the habit of consciously using every muscle to its fullest.
What was more frightening was that he was doing all of this with a smile.
Even when he woke up from nodding off, he flashed a bright smile and got scolded.
— Why are you smiling? You look stupid.
— It’s my first lead role in my life. It’s not an official performance, but it’s still great! Ah, I want to do better!
And he sat down, saying such cheesy words.
Groooo—
Miho observed the aura of the two actors facing each other on stage. While Ryu Shin’s aura was considerably larger, Yoomyeong’s aura was dynamically blooming, spreading its wings.
This was the aura of a skilled actor.
Even if it was small, it swayed and expanded its presence.
The tender presence, which had been too small and faint in his previous life and had been crushed no matter how hard it struggled, was now clad in strength and was dominating the stage like David before Goliath.
The spectacle was...
‘Hmm. Quite...’
The fox’s nine tails swirled.
“When I’m with you, I feel the same way I do when I’m singing.”
A man full of happiness. He looked confident, as if he owned the world.
While admiring the actor, who seemed possessed by a talented young artist, Jae Pil could not release the tension in his body due to a chilling premonition.
‘...Could it be... again...?’
His successive success, success, and successes.
Each time a man’s voice came from the left and right, his face grew hotter and hotter as he responded with feminine gestures.
His confident movements slowly gave way to anxiety.
Waggle waggle—
The voices of the men overlapped and grew louder.
“I love Mary.”
“She is the love of my life.”
“But...”
Freddie, trying not to hear the rising noise, covered his ears and turned to the right. But the sound, now loud enough to fill the stage, eventually shattered with a crash.
And then.
Finally, as if resigned, Freddie lowered his hand from his ear, stood up, and turned around.
‘Ah... Again.’
Jae Pil felt a chill run down his spine.
The thrill of love turned into irresistible desire.
An impulse too intense to dismiss as mere agony.
But beneath that impulse lay the sorrow of a man who had to hurt the love of his life.
I don’t want to lose you. I really don’t.
Those feelings were divided into cuts and etched into his eyes.
“I... I think I’m gay.”
“...I knew it. I wanted to pretend I didn’t know until the very end, if I could...”
“I love you.”
“...What do you want me to do?”
“Stay by my side forever.”
“By the side of a man I can’t even hold? Do you know how cruel that is?”
“I know it’s selfish. I know it’s forced and childish.”
“What am I to you?”
“...You, you’re the love of my life.”
Despite his heartfelt confession, a weary Mary turned her back on him.
He watched her longingly.
He watched as someone precious to him left because of his uncontrollable instincts. With every step she took, he tried to hold her back hundreds of times, to dissuade her, to plead with her. Unable to open his mouth, he pleaded with his eyes, hoping she would look back just once.
However, she eventually disappeared from the stage...
A melody began. Then, murmurs flowed from his mouth.
...Love of my life, can’t you see~
Love of my life, don’t you see...
Bring it back, bring it back~
Bring it back, bring it back,
Don’t take it away from me~
Please don’t take it away from me.
Because you don’t know what it means to me ~
You don’t understand what it means to me.
The composition was flawless, and the lyrics were adjusted to make the dialogue more convincing.
And above all, the living Freddie on stage.
‘Ah...’
From that moment on, Jae Pil could no longer ‘evaluate.’ He had become a member of the audience.
The second half, while not excessive, was a performance that captured Freddie’s unique gestures and behaviors and was a spectacle in itself.
However, it couldn’t compare to Freddie’s emotional line, which gripped the audience relentlessly for 15 minutes without missing a beat.
There wasn’t a female student who didn’t shed tears in the scene where he clung to Mary, and everyone let out a sigh of relief when he finally found his home with Jim.
During the final monologue that echoed the beginning, everyone’s eyes turned red.
Clap clap—
After the performance ended, the audience, who had been unable to breathe until the ending BGM completely faded, only began to clap after a brief pause.
Clap clap clap clap—
The applause grew louder and lasted for a long time. Amid the applause, Yoomyeong trembled.
It was the first applause directed entirely at him in 15 years.
Though the audience wasn’t large, their sincere applause, which continued until their palms turned red, pierced him with a tingling sensation with every clap, enough to make his spine tremble.
‘This is my acting...’
There was a strange sensation, as if someone else had possessed his body and then left.
Despite the emptiness, there was a peculiar catharsis.
‘My hands, my feet, my gaze...’
For a moment, the colors of the world looked different.
In his past life, he had not known that the audience’s gaze could deepen the immersion of an already engrossed actor.
Bow—
Yoomyeong moved awkwardly, as if just coming back to himself, and bowed.
It was his first stage greeting in this life.
“...Everyone worked hard. Detailed comments will be given after the midterm exam.”
And as he was about to leave the classroom, he couldn’t hold back and turned around.
“I must be fair as a professor, but as an audience member, it doesn’t feel right to remain silent about a work that deserves praise.”
He looked straight at Yoomyeong and spoke.
“At this moment, I want to praise the past me who opened this course this year. Thank you for letting me witness the best method acting of my life.”
