Chapter 249: Over Your Dead Body
Commander Li looked from the doorway to me, then to Yuche, then to Zhenlan, then to Chenghai.
His expression suggested he was beginning to understand that the military manuals had not prepared him for this household.
That was fine.
Nothing had prepared me for this household either, and technically it was mine.
I took a breath, then pointed toward the ceiling. "Fine. The house is damaged. The entrance is damaged. The plants are damaged. The porch is probably damaged, the floors are disgusting, and apparently the ceiling has decided to show everyone its fragile emotional state. But that does not mean we are moving."
Commander Li’s voice stayed careful. "If another attack comes before repairs are made—"
"Then the next group can die in the yard like the last group."
"The last group made it into the house... thus the current state."
"Don’t you ’thus’ me. That group is now they compost. I fail to see the issue."
Yuche adjusted his grip on me. "The issue is that you are injured and the house needs work."
I looked up at him. "Do not use your serious voice on me while you are part of the problem."
His eyes lowered to mine. "How am I part of the problem?"
"You are carrying me, which makes it difficult to gesture dramatically to get my point across."
"I assure you, that was entirely intentional."
I gasped. "See?!? Problem."
"Sure. Let’s go with that."
There was absolutely no remorse in his voice. None. Not a single drop.
What was even worse was the fact that the corner of his mouth moved like he knew exactly what he was doing to my blood pressure and considered it a reasonable trade for keeping me off my feet.
I looked away before I did something stupid...
Like enjoy it.
Chenghai stepped over a piece of broken wood and crouched beside the front wall, brushing his fingers over a crack that ran from the doorframe toward the baseboard. His expression turned even less pleasant. "This was not built to take impacts from ability users, explosions, or large plant movement. The frame is weak here. The ceiling crack may be connected to the wall shift."
"No shit. The house was built probably decades before the word ’apocalypse’ was even whispered about," I muttered. "You can’t blame it for that. What you can blame it for is the fact that it has bones, and they are being drama queens."
"It needs reinforcement," Chenghai said.
Commander Li nodded. "Which is why leaving temporarily would be safer."
"Over your dead body are we moving."
He stopped and slowly turned to look at me like he hadn’t quite heard what I had said.
I smiled at him.
He did not smile back.
Smart man.
The baby vine slid back into the doorway, this time without any visible body parts. It tapped one tendril politely against the cracked floor as if asking whether the conversation had improved. I pointed at the ceiling. "You see that? That is what happens when people come here and annoy me."
The vine lifted its little leaf head toward the crack.
"No eating the ceiling."
It lowered again.
"Or licking it."
The vine froze.
I narrowed my eyes. "Were you considering licking it?"
No answer.
I sighed. "Everyone in this house is a problem."
Zhenlan stepped closer, his gaze moving over the foyer with a different kind of focus now. He was no longer just reacting to the damage. He was calculating. I could practically see him stripping the house apart in his head and putting it back together with things I did not know the names of and would probably resent paying attention to. That was useful. Annoying, but useful.
"If you refuse to move," he said, "then the house cannot be patched. It needs to be changed."
I gave him a wary look. "Changed how?"
"Reinforced entry points. Protected windows. A stronger internal frame where the structure has shifted. Firebreaks where the plant coverage was burned. Backup power routed safely if you intend to continue using solar. Better water storage. A controlled approach from the road. Defensive positions that do not depend entirely on the plants reacting in time."
I stared at him.
He continued, because apparently my suffering encouraged him. "The foundation should be inspected. The wiring needs to be checked before anyone adds more panels or batteries. The roofline matters. Drainage matters. Load-bearing walls matter. If the house becomes the center of a defensible territory, then the surrounding area has to be planned instead of allowed to grow into a death maze."
The baby vine slowly turned its leaf head toward him.
I covered its eyes with my hand.
Or I tried to.
It did not have eyes, so mostly I just slapped a leaf.
"Do not listen to him," I told it. "Your death maze is beautiful."
Zhenlan’s expression did not change. "It is also inefficient."
The vine hissed.
I patted it. "That was rude, but he may have a point."
Commander Li stared at the vine. "Did it understand him?"
"Yes," I answered.
"That is concerning."
"In case you haven’t noticed... most things in my life are."
Chenghai stood, dusting plaster from his fingers. "He is right, though. The house needs more than repairs."
I frowned at him. "Do not encourage him. He gets taller when people agree with him."
Zhenlan looked down at me. "I am already tall."
"That is the problem."
Yuche started walking toward the living room, apparently deciding that the conversation could continue while I was deposited somewhere less likely to become part of the floor. I let him carry me because... why the hell not?
He liked carrying me, and as much as I bitched and complained... I liked being carried.
It was a win-win thing.
The living room was not as bad as the entryway, but that only meant the damage had chosen to be insulting instead of catastrophic.
Dust coated the floor. A crack ran along one corner of the wall near the window. Several leaves from some fake indoor plants were scattered like casualties of war, and one of the smaller vines had wrapped itself around a fallen picture frame as if trying to comfort it.
I pointed at the frame. "See? The plants have manners."
Yuche lowered me onto the couch with infuriating gentleness. "Stay."
I looked up at him. "I am not a dog."
"No," he said. "A dog listens better."
