Chapter 59 - A Little Sweet And A Little Bit Fiesty
April looked up n felt shy, Dean eyes seemed to see right through her, "Sorry I rambled at the end."
Dean shook his head, "Dont be sorry. You apologise too much. Just be yourself with me, I want to get to know you that's why I asked you the question to start with."
April felt lost in his blinding honesty, was he real? She couldn't believe a soul like his existed. But here he was genuinely asking about her. She simply replied with a natural smile.
The food arrived and they continued to ask each other questions, mostly they were silly or light topics. Dean got to see her smile and laugh, they had good banter together so the conversation flowed. He saw how easy it was to be around her, she was the light he needed, her heart was genuine and grounded.
After the meal had ended April was smiling and happily glancing out at the scenery, she stood up wanting to see the night sky clearly. Walking to the balcony she leaned against the cold railings and felt a chill in the air, it was peaceful.
Dean stood up and joined her to look out over the balcony, he did not need to stare at stars when the brightest and most stunning light to him was her. "I find something new about you every day." He remarked as he took off his jacket and placed it over her shoulders, he saw her slight blush as she thanked him.
April smiled, "I am a contradiction of rainbows and black hearts, a little sweet and a little feisty." She smiled as she stared out towards the twinkling night sky, she long ago stopped believing in love and fairy tales after experience had taught her many harsh life lessons. Maybe happily ever after wasn't meant for her.
"But complex people are the ones who hide the most beautiful secrets," He stared lovingly at her side profile.
She blushed and replied again still not convinced, "Yes but I am a contradiction to my exterior, I push everyone away but in my heart im waiting for the one. I would prefer not to fall again when I know all that awaits is a painful heartbreak. To trust someone's words when they, or if they do whisper forever to me." For April in her past life, she had failed to realise the reason for her happiness one day would be the reason for her pain the next. The fire that filled her heart and soul with warmth had turned everything into ash.
Dean sighed, Why was she so hard on herself? "I'd say your inner and exterior are battling each other, wanting love but not accepting it. One day love will come in the form of somebody who wants to give more than take and you will feel the truest form of love. I promise it will happen for you."
April scrunched up her eyebrows, "I should thank the one who made me this way, I have loved and learnt never to do so again. But I must say your outlook on life and love is pretty awesome, I can almost believe in your words."
Dean beamed at the compliment he wanted to be her hope, "Everyone has their own beauty we just need the eyes to see it."
"What's your weakness?" April asked, she couldn't look at Dean as she focused on the stars, his honey brown eyes would only steal her heart.
"What's yours?" He asked wanting to know more about her than himself.
April knew he was dodging the question but ignored that and chose to answer. "I am sensitive though I don't show it, the smallest thing hurts me."
"So what's your strength?" Dean wanted to know all sides of her mind and heart and know she has opened up he wanted more.
She smiled up at the stars, "Little things make me happy."
"You have a great outlook yourself, angel." The wind blew and Dean held his hand back from moving a stray hair that fell across her face, he wanted to see her beautiful face. April fell into her own thoughts and Dean saw this he gave her the time to think.
"People change too, one minute they promise you everything and you are everything to them and the next you are just… nothing. The hardest thing is going from everything to nothing." April spoke from her heart, she never opened up yet here she was baring her hurt soul. Dean seemed so easy to open up to like she could bare her soul and see no judgement.
"Yes people do change, even I am no exception. But there is a difference in change and growth, my way of thinking may change, my mindset or personality may change due to life lessons, even my character and attitude may change as well. But I promise you there is something that never changes and that's my heart." Aprils head snapped in Dean's direction and her cheeks flushed she felt like that was a confession but did not let herself believe it.
Dean continued, "When u have occupied someone's heart completely it is impossible to forget, the heart remembers the emotions it felt from the first 'Hi, how are you doing?"
"Yes but isn't the saddest thing we all end up learning is that you will have a last day with everyone you meet?" April's heart felt a bit in chaos he was swaying her heart to believe again and her mind tried to clear it.
"Yes we all have a last day with someone but if they are special enough you won't let them go." Dean wouldn't give up he felt this was the closest he has ever been to April. She should have love and hope and he would be there as she learnt to let him in.
"The way you see love is magic in its truest form." She giggled lightly in an attempt to lighten the mood.
Dean laughed he didn't need or believe in love till he saw her. Deciding it was time he opened up in an indirect way to test the waters he spoke from his heart, "I want a soft kind of love. A best friend kind of love. A "good morning babe, I will make you coffee and meet you in the shower" kind of love. I want a lazy Sundays spent in bed and groggy Mondays getting ready for work side by side. I want the kind of love that makes you question if you ever actually felt love before. I want a slow and steady and I want jumping headfirst into anything as long as we are together. The kind of love that feels like home and a great adventure. I want that love."
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