Chapter 3
I opened my eyes after I heard the sound of the door closing. When I lifted up my head to look, JiHan was already gone. I came out of the bath and put some clothes on in a hurry.
Why the hell is he here, why! I threw on some clothes without bothering to dry off, but I stopped when I grabbed the doorknob. Although I thought he hadn’t seen my whole body, I wasn’t sure. I’d seen his face, the way he was frowning. That was not the face of someone who’d seen nothing.
Crazy! I grabbed my wet hair and sat back down. No. It’s okay. So what? I got naked as an actress. In front of an audience. Nothing different. This marriage is a play and that man is an audience. It’s just showing my body to an audience as a part of the play.
I stood back up to grab the doorknob and took a deep breath. It’s alright, alright, alright. I tried to believe nothing even happened. Well...what? Did anything even happen? I don’t remember? I manipulated my memory and turned the doorknob.
When I came out, JiHan was there in front of the table. He was reading JiKyung’s letter, holding it with both of his hands. His face was wrathful.
Wait what does it say? Why does he have a face like that? Does he sense this marriage is fake? I was so embarrassed that I didn’t even remember what it said so I ran at him.
“Don’t read that! That’s mine!” I grabbed his arm, trying to take away the letter.
However, he put it up over my head and sadly, I couldn’t reach that high. No matter what I did, I could barely reach to his elbow. He kept reading out loud, ignoring my attempts to stop him.
“‘Buy our furniture and stuff with the card too. I’m going to tell mom that we bought it with your money?'” he continued, frowning again.
“Give it to me! Why are you reading my letter!” I cried.
“‘You’re already doing me a favor by marrying me, so it makes me uncomfortable if you buy things as well. Use everything freely, the house, the card, everything is yours?’ Haha, this is ridiculous!”
JiHan shook his head and put his hand, which held my letter, down to his waist. I quickly snatched it from his hand. Instead of taking the letter back, he grabbed me by the collar.
“Did you get pregnant?” he asked with a cold, crazy stare.
“What?”
“Did you or not?”
“No, I didn’t,” I answered.
“If you didn’t, why would he do that!” He shook me while still holding me by the collar.
“Why you! House, card, everything is given to you and what? ‘I’m going to tell mom we bought it with your money? Thank you for getting married to me?'”
“So what!” I was getting so dizzy I lost my mind and yelled at him.
JiHan stopped and looked at me as if it was ridiculous.
“It...it’s true. I didn’t threaten him. It’s just him willingly doing that for me,” I explained.
JiHan sighed. His grip loosened. I took his hand off of my body and stepped back to keep my distance as I spoke.
“You seem to misunderstand. I have never asked for this kind of thing. He gave me the access card today and I found this letter and stuff here.”
“Why would he give you those if you never asked? Do you think it makes any sense?” JiHan questioned me.
“It’s...it’s because we love... we love each other,” I stammered.
“What?” he said, looking shocked.
“It’s like this when you are in love. You want to give everything and never feel empty. That’s love,” I insisted, as if this was the unchangeable truth.
“Why does he give love to you!” exclaimed JiHan.
“Go ask JiKyung!” I answered back. This was not acting. “No matter why he wants to get married, this is your older brother who loves me and wants to buy me things. Why would you bother me about that?”
My dispute made him close his eyes and take a deep breath. He put both his hands on his waist, frowning silently.
“I’m going to ask what I need to ask you, then.” He said calmly, opening his eyes. “Why are you here?”
“JiKyung told me to stay here,” I replied.
“You took the money envelope from me. Don’t you know what it means? Did you think I gave you taxi money? To go home safely?” JiHan asked.
“Ah, the envelope. I know what it means but I don’t want to take that. I was actually going to return–”
“Why? Not enough?” he interrupted.
That was technically true. JiKyung promised me 500k in advance. 100k wouldn’t change my mind.
“No it’s not like that...” I insisted.
I tried to get into actress mode by looking down to get emotional. I needed to show my acting skills were worthy of 500k. However, JiHan didn’t wait for me to get fully into character.
“How much do you need?” he asked.
“Huh?”
“How much do you need to get away from him?”
I almost asked how much he would give me. Damn, let me gather myself! I recovered and jumped fully into acting.
“No matter how much you give me, I’m not going to leave. I can’t”
JiHan stared in silence.
“As JiKyung loves me, I love him, too.”
In my mind, I became terminally ill, watching the last leaf on a tree. If it fell down, I would die. I looked into his eyes with that mindset, and I asked him as if it were my last wish before I died, “Please... let us love.”
JiHan looked at my eyes, then took a deep breath.
“Go ahead then,” he finally announced.
“What? Really?” I asked excitedly.
“But love is made with your mind, not paper. Love? Go do that. Just don’t think to be part of our family.”
“...what?” I asked again, my excitement plummeting.
“Don’t even think about getting married.JiHan grabbed my arm and walked toward the door. Due to my wet feet and the power difference between us, I was easily dragged. He pushed me out and closed the door.
“Hey!” I yelled.
I slipped down on the floor, but got back up to grab the doorknob. The closed door didn’t even budge. The access card was inside and I didn’t know the password, JiKyung hadn’t told me yet.
“What are you doing!” I yelled again, knocking and trying to open the door.
JiHan spoke from the other side of the door. “Go home safely. Please do not come back again.”
He slid the white envelope with 100k underneath the door.
I kept knocking and yelling, still barefoot, but JiHan never responded. It was questionable if he even heard me. I may have had 100k in my hand, but I didn’t have a wallet or a phone, so I had no idea how to get home. How do I use the public transportation with a 100k check? Not even a shoe store would accept a 100k check. I ended up walking home with a nuisance in my hand. Jerk! Crazy weirdo! He should have at least given me my backpack. Why doesn’t he have mercy? I walked, half complaining and half breathing, for hours in darkness, barefoot.
* * *
Lee Jihan
No matter what the shameless girl said, I ignored her and went to my older brother’s bedroom to turn on the audio with a remote control. When I played classical music, the noise outside the door was completely buried. I closed my eyes and crossed my arms to calm down, lying on the bed.
However, I couldn’t really be calm, so I took out my phone to make a call. When mom picked up, I immediately started to argue.
“Mom, tell me something. JiKyung is not your child, huh?”
[What kind of question is that?] she asked.
“If he is, how is this even possible? How did you let him get married to a girl like that! My brother doesn’t deserve that!”
[He likes her. The person who is going to live with her is JiKyung. As long as he’s satisfied, that’s all.]
“What do you mean? Our family is not like that. We are members of the aristocracy! This is not his own matter. It is a matter of the honor of our family. Mom, are you going to humiliate me like this?”
[I’m not going to consider the financial aspects of my daughter-in-law. If you are right and we are an aristocracy family, one bad girl doesn’t change anything. So as long as you guys are satisfied with your girls, I’m okay with that.]
“Yeah, you might be okay with that yourself but I’m not!” I hung up emotionally and threw the phone on the bed.
How marvelous my brother is.
How perfect my brother is.
How does he meet...that kind of girl!
I fell down on the bed. I put my head on the pillow and thought about her profile. Nameless college dropout, obscure actress, insurance agent step-mom, dad is a security guard for the apartment.
Does she think she’s in a fairytale? Not only that, all the girls who get married to princes and live happily ever after, are either princesses or aristocracy. The Little Mermaid, Snow White, Sleeping Beauty. They are all royal family.
She’s short, like a dwarf. What kind of face is that? She looks like an elementary schooler! Well, she looks the same now as when she was in elementary school.
I clicked my tongue, thinking about 20 years ago. I sometimes used to peek at my brother’s friends who came to our house back then. I remembered looking at her face too. Has she been living with that face for 20 years? It hasn’t improved.
She had a tiny nose, tiny mouth, the only thing big on her face was her eyes. She’s been living with those for 20 years...eyes don’t even get bigger! And her breasts...
I frowned again.
“Why the hell does he like that kind of girl!” It was so absurd that I talked out loud to myself.
I should’ve stopped their friendship 20 years ago.I should have removed the seed. I thought she was just the daughter of my mom’s friend, and that the last I would hear about their family would be that they secretly ran away from debt collectors. I didn’t know they would meet again at a marriageable age. How can he treat her like his significant other? If I’d seen the future, I would’ve known better than to think she was just one of his numerous friends. I could’ve stopped this! Damn it.
There was no way to warn my past self 20 years ago. I decided to just do my best to make her leave JiKyung. I rolled over and drew AhJung’s face on the ceiling. I made a promise to myself while looking at it. Studying in the U.S. would have to wait. Whatever. I was not leaving until she left my brother.
* * *
The next day, AhJung’s phone rang early in the morning. I was eating cereal in the kitchen, so I walked to the living room and took her phone out of her backpack. The caller on the screen was Lee, JiKyung. It was my brother!
When I checked the time, it looked to be about the time he arrived in Paris. Did he think of her as soon as he got there? I frowned, thinking about how I had not received any messages from him. Irritated, I yelled at him right after I picked up the phone
“WHY!”
[Who is...this? JiHan?]
“Yeah, me.”
[“You.. why...why are you picking this up? Where’s AhJung? Is she with you?] His tone sounded embarrassed.
“She’s not with me.”
[Where is she, then?]
“I don’t know. How should I know?” I asked, annoyed.
[You have the phone but don’t know where the owner is?]
“Yes.”
[Where are you?]
“Your home.”
[Why are you there?]
“I’m going to stay here while you’re gone.”
[JiHan, that’s where I asked AhJung to stay. It’s our home.]
His voice lost its warmth and became more serious.
[Did you... meet AhJung there?]
“I didn’t meet her but ran into her.”
I turned around to see the bathroom she’d made a mess in.
“Coincidentally, unfortunately.”
He sighed when I added more.
[Did you kick her out?]
“This is all for you, brother.”
[You kicked her out.]
“I escorted her to where she deserves to be.”
[LEE JIHAN!]
His sudden shouting made my eyes widen.
[Go apologize!]
“What?”
[Apologize to your sister-in-law and bring her back home.]
“Are you crazy? Why should I?”
[Because you are my brother.]
“What?”
[You are my brother and she’s your sister-in-law. It’s common sense that you should respect her and if you don’t, you have to apologize.]
This was not the voice I knew. I had never heard him sound this mad. My mind almost drew a blank but I gathered myself together to talk to him.
“No. I don’t want her to be my sister-in-law. Why her? There are so many girls that like you.”
[Without AhJung, I am not going to get married.]
He sounded certain, as if there was no need for explanation.
[If you want to continue to be my brother, go apologize.]
“Nope, I can’t do that. If YOU want to continue to be MY brother, go break up with her.”
I refused to give in.
“Choose. Me or her.”
My coercion made him sigh deeply. After too long of a pause, he gave me his answer.
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