Chapter 1399: Shameless Idea
It was around 11 am when we flattened the Godslayer Fortress and conquered an important stronghold of the event. However, this was but the first of many more difficult challenges. The Earth Devourer was just the eighth strongest boss of the Nine Purgatory Sovereigns, and all of the bosses that were said to reside in the unknown ruin right now such as Opero the Nightwalker, Linda the Whisperer, Coldblade the Infinite Storm and even Lin Na the Purgatory Ruler himself were way stronger than Skullblood was. I had no doubt that one hell of a battle awaited us.
……
The spring season had visited Suzhou in full force. The girls were dressing skimpier and skimpier as a result of the rising temperature.
For this lunch, Lian Xin had put on a light blue casual shirt and tight-fitting casual pants. They outlined her long, slender legs and firm butt nicely, drawing many eyes on the streets. He Yi and Murong Mingyue both wore classy outfits and mini skirts that gave them the air of mature women. As I followed behind them, I made a silent fist and whispered in my head: Now this is my kind of dish…
We entered the car and traveled to Suzhou University first.
When we arrived, Lin Yixin was already waiting for us in her pretty outfit when we got there. Next, we went straight to Juxiange.
Lin Yixin had booked a room for us and asked the dishes to be served first while we waited for Beiming Xue to arrive. When the second last dish was served, the archer finally knocked on the door, came in smelling of the streets, and sat down beside me. The very first thing she said was, "Congratulations on getting the Flying Dragon Wristguards and the Dragon Soul Ring, big bro!"
I smiled. "Congratulations to you on getting the Infinite Quiver too…"
A smirking Lian Xin looked back and forth between He Yi and Lin Yixin before asking me an evil question, "So, who are you going to gift the Dragon Soul Ring since you can’t wear it, big bro? Will it be Sister Eve, or Sister Lin Yixin?"
I hummed thoughtfully. "I don’t know yet. I guess that depends on how they perform…"
He Yi chuckled. "What will the criteria be then?"
I tried to think of something, but all I got for my efforts was a headache. So, I asked, "What about you, sis? How do you think they should decide the ownership of the Dragon Soul Ring?"
Murong Mingyue leaned against her backrest and crossed her arms in front of her chest, the movement causing her massive 34Es to shudder visibly beneath her white bustier. After stroking her hair and shooting me a flirtatious smirk, she answered, "It’s simple. We shall decide this by testing the thickness of their face. The Dragon Soul Ring is a precious Ghost Armament after all. It is only right that they pay in something of appropriate value, right?"
"Uh…"
Both He Yi and Lin Yixin looked stupefied by the suggestion. "What do you mean testing the thickness of our face?"
Murong Mingyue chuckled. "You guys saw the pharmacy on the opposite side of this street, right? I want the three of you to walk into the pharmacy together. Lu Chen, ask the pharmacist if you can purchase two condoms, and no, you’re not allowed to buy an entire box. Just two condoms. After that, Lu Chen will turn around and leave, and both Eve and Yiyi will follow right behind him. This way, the pharmacist will know that the three of you are together, and that the reason Lu Chen bought the two condoms is to… Well, you know what I mean…"
He Yi and Lin Yixin blushed like two apples instantly. He Yi shot Murong Mingyue a glare and rebuked her, "I should’ve known that you would come up with a shameless idea like this…"
Murong Mingyue cackled. "What can I do? The word ‘shame’ has been removed from my dictionary since the day you took me under your wing…"
Meanwhile, Lin Yixin was looking back and forth between me and He Yi with steam rising from her ears. "Sister Eve, do we really gotta do this? What if, and I know the odds are slim, but what if we meet an acquaintance while we are performing this ‘test’? We won’t be able to show our faces in Suzhou anymore…"
He Yi let out a triumphant giggle. "Does that mean you’re forfeiting, Yiyi? If you are, I’ll happily take the ring off Lu Chen’s hands. 5% HP per second regeneration is super good, and it even gives 115% Attack. To call this ring a super cavalryman ring would be an understatement. My offensive power is a bit lacking anyway, so this is the perfect piece of equipment for me. Thank you very much~"
Lin Yixin hurriedly grabbed He Yi’s hands and said, "Wait wait wait! I never said I wouldn’t go! I…I’ll do it!"
Murong Mingyue slapped the table lightly like she was hitting the gravel. "Then it is decided!"
I stared at her. "Excuse me? I’m the one who has to do the most embarrassing shit in this ‘test’, and you didn’t even ask my opinion. I’ve never bought a condom from a pharmacy in my life, and the first time I do you’re going to put me through this?"
Murong Mingyue puffed up her chest and said tauntingly, "Oh? You don’t want to do it? Sure! I’ll just ask Li Chengfeng to perform the test with them later. He’s quite the handsome lad anyway, the clerk would totally believe that they were with him…"
I answered immediately, "Fine, I’ll go. There’s nothing I enjoy more than challenges I’ve never done before…"
"And he calls me shameless. Ah pooh!"
Me: "..."
……
We started eating after the last dish was served. We also ordered a bottle of low alcohol red wine, Beiming Xue and Lian Xin didn’t have any since they were driving, and even the rest of us only took small sips from our glasses. A quick discussion later, we decided to sleep for about 2 to 3 hours in the afternoon before going back online. If you thought it wasn’t enough to reinvigorate us fully, that was the point. We wanted our bodies to be suitably fatigued so we could sleep at 12 am sharp tonight and readjust our biological clocks. We might be professional gamers, but even we couldn’t sleep during the day and play during the night all the time. It just wasn’t healthy. Even Murong Mingyue chided me and said, "Do you want to keep your kidneys or not? Do you want to last 15 seconds or less before giving out? You may be satisfied, but do you think Eve and Yiyi will be?"
I hung my head in shame as I absorbed her teachings. Every time I thought my thoughts were growing too perverted, Murong Mingyue never failed to prove that she could do worse.
"Lu Chen."
Lin Yixin’s cheeks looked a bit rosy since she had downed a full glass of wine. "I heard you clashed multiple times against Dark Mercenaries in the Ancient Chaotic Secret Realm, but only when they have crossed you. What are you thinking?"
I let out a sigh before answering, "You were at Chance Bar. You know what Little Piglet went through. Personally, I believe that Little Piglet is doing the right thing. Even his choice of leaving to leave the China server and become the lord and master of a guild as abominable as Dark Mercenaries was a choice driven by necessity, not greed. That is why I don’t wish to initiate conflict with Dark Mercenaries unless absolutely necessary. I have no wish to stand in a man’s path of vengeance, when his cause is perfectly just."
I clenched my fists a little before continuing, "Neither Little nor Shangguan Wan’er will report Lu Chao in order to protect her owner, so the next best thing to take revenge is to make Lu Chao lose all the investment he has sunk in the game. There, I may even help him if the circumstances are right."
Lin Yixin watched me with widened eyes for a few seconds before breaking into a smile. "Very well. I know you never act without reason, so I will support you if that is your decision."
Murong Mingyue sighed helplessly. "Ai, Yiyi is so deep in love that she has lost herself…"
Me: "..."
Lin Yixin shot me a pitiable expression as if she wanted me to say something.
So, I set down my chopsticks and said, "Yes, yes, no need to play coy. I promise I’ll buy that condom with you later."
Lin Yixin: "..."
……
I was kinda hoping that the two girls would chicken out when it was time to actually perform the test, but they didn’t. I supposed it made sense considering the worth of the Dragon Soul Ring. Lin Yixin’s cheeks were fully rosy from the alcohol, but He Yi looked none the worse for wear as she crossed the street while chatting with Murong Mingyue. She was a businesswoman after all.
There was a moment of silence when we finally arrived in front of the pharmacy. Finally, I said, "Let’s go…"
He Yi followed behind me, and Lin Yixin, behind He Yi.
After I went into the pharmacy, I looked around and found an auntie about 50 years old and wearing a pair of myopia glasses. She was most likely the pharmacist.
"What would you like to purchase, boy?" the auntie asked.
I stuttered out, "D-do you sell condoms?"
"Sure. Which brand do you like?" the auntie replied calmly. She must be very used to situations like this.
I answered, "Anything’s fine, I… I just want to buy two condoms…"
The auntie frowned. "Boy, nobody sells single condoms, just boxes. You either buy an entire box or none at all…"
I fished around my pockets and produced a 5-yuan paper. "But… I only have 5 RMB. I can’t afford the whole box. Can you make an exception, please?"
She fell for it. While sighing to herself about the state of the economy and the poor young people these days, she opened a box of Jissbon and passed me two condoms. "Here. I’ll take your 5 RMB for two condoms."
I nodded in thanks. "Thank you, auntie!"
And now came the most crucial step of this test. I turned around and made toward the exit without looking back. At first, the auntie had thought the girls to be independent customers. Then, He Yi followed behind me with a mask of perfect calm on her face, and a red-faced Lin Yixin lifted her skirt higher just so that she could escape the pharmacy as soon as possible. At this point, it became as clear as day who I was going to use the condoms on, or at least that was what the auntie thought…
When we finally escaped the place, He Yi heaved out a sigh of relief and said, "For heavens’ sake, that was more stressful than the general meetings I attended while I was still in GGS. Thank goodness the auntie didn’t ask any awkward questions, or else…"
I hurriedly shoved the two condoms into Murong Mingyue’s hands before saying, "Here’s your stuff. But uh, I don’t think a winner is decided? Both Yiyi and Eve managed to clear the test of courage…"
Murong Mingyue slipped the condoms into her handbag and replied calmly, "That’s easy. Just play a game of rock-paper-scissors, and we’ll have a winner."
He Yi’s jaw hit the floor. "If we’re going to decide it like this, then why did you make us go to the pharmacy in the first place?"
"To further hone your bond, of course!"
"Pooh! Like we need you to hone our bond!"
"Haha! Well, get it over already. I want to catch that nap as soon as possible!"
……
Despite knowing now that they had been tricked, He Yi and Lin Yixin still played the game of rock-paper-scissors. It would be a round of one all or nothing! Rock, paper, scissors!
In the end, Lin Yixin managed to defeat He Yi’s scissors with her rock. He Yi sighed in defeat. "I knew I was terrible at gambling!"
Lin Yixin said smilingly, "Thank you, Sister Eve!"
I smiled without saying anything. The Dragon Soul Ring would’ve been in good hands either way. Lin Yixin’s offensive power was great enough to threaten even me, but her class’s natural fragility meant that she was never going to begrudge a tank piece of equipment. The Dragon Soul Ring was one such item, and it would definitely improve her strength to a whole new level!
……
After the little intermission, we returned to the workshop and took a short nap of three hours. Then, we returned to the game and continued clearing the March of Chaos event. Obviously, I was still at first place on the contribution point ranking because I had killed Skullblood, one of the Nine Purgatory Sovereigns himself. At this point, few could hope to rival me unless they killed another Purgatory Sovereign.
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