Compared to her sistersno, compared to most people in the world, Ruyue's situation was unique.
It could be said that she had the same independent attitude as Elena, yet the same desire as Rose.
But weren't those two things contradictory?
In Ruyue's case, no.
Ruyue in particular wasn't really fazed by the notice of deployment.
It didn't mean anything to her.
Unlike Rose, she didn't harbor any feelings against the outside world. However, unlike Elena, she didn't have any particular desire to experience it either.
Her situation was a bit special.
Ruyue experienced a Cosmic Rebirth quite unlike anything her sisters experienced.
She didn't tell them about it because she didn't want to worry them, but it was a moment she'd never forget.
At that time, within the barrier of law, she met a version of herself that she'd never seen before.
She looked roughly the same, just a bit more mature. The ice-cold expression on her face, however, was exactly the same.
That version of herself, she originally thought it was an illusion, but her opinions began to change as that Ruyue walked her through the path she was taking.
Absolute Yin.
It was an extreme power. In a sense, it was half of Existence.
Damien was able to control Existence to the level he could exclusively because of his physique. If not for it, he would've been just like Dante or The Unrecorded, left stuck at a certain point and never able to progress again.
What about Ruyue?
Just like the other two, she didn't have a physique or anything aiding her.
But unlike them, she didn't have an inherent connection to Existence born from an extreme level of practice either.
She was taking a path that was massive from the start, challenging Existence with its sheer existence.
It wasn't a path that could be walked without consequences.
That day, Ruyue saw her life end.
She saw herself change until she had no emotion left. She watched as her laws influenced her mind and soul to the point where she could no longer see the light anymore.
That version of her lived for thousands upon thousands of years. She experienced so much and rose to a position not much lower than someone absolutely in control over the world.
But in the process, she sacrificed everything.
Because she didn't feel anything.
She drowned in her own power.
That Ruyue was merely a shell of a person, a carrier of law that had no personality of its own.
Her indifference drove a wedge between her and the sisters she cherished. It made her abandon the family Damien introduced her to, and in the end, it led to her abandoning even him.
The only thing Ruyue had was strength.
The world was colorless. Life didn't have any meaning. But in the end, Ruyue truly became an embodiment of Absolute Yin.
Just as her Divinity promised her she would.
Ruyue was forced to answer the question of whether she wanted to risk such a future or not.
Did she want to throw away the path she'd been following for so long because of the consequences that lay at the end of it?
Did she want to continue forward knowing that her emotions would die as she got stronger?
The answer to both questions was no.
Then, what did she end up doing?
To this day, Ruyue's emotions had been numbing.
Her icy face was all anyone in the palace had seen, an expression of indifference that truly didn't take anything or anyone into account.
To some, Ruyue felt more like a doll than a person.
She'd follow the same routine, training to increase her power, and she would do nothing else.
bender
Of course, Rose and the rest could understand her situation. After so long, they'd learned to read Ruyue's emotions without having to see her facial expression.
Claire and Serena also eventually learned about Ruyue's personality. They understood that despite the way she presented herself on the outside, she had a lot of emotion within that she just didn't express.
Right, she had a lot of emotions.
Rose and Ruyue had a lot more in common than either of them realized.
In fact, Ruyue's emotions towards Damien weren't much different from Rose's. They were just a bit less dependent, but that didn't mean either of them was wrong.
It was just that Ruyue knew how to contain her emotions a lot better than Rose did.
When Damien returned to the palace, she allowed her emotions to run wild and cherished the time she had with him. She loved as hard as possible for as long as possible, and when Damien inevitably left again, she closed her heart off, letting her feelings simmer until they could be released again.
Ruyue kept her heart sealed and allowed those emotions to exist within, but she would never show others how she was feeling.
That day in the barrier of law, Ruyue had to make a choice.
But she did not agree with the binary question she'd been asked.
She refused to pick one of the answers presented to her, and instead made another sacrifice.
She traded the emotions that weren't essential for the ones she didn't want to lose.
While color would fade from her world, while everything else about life would be bland
She would still be able to pursue Absolute Yin.
And the emotions she held towards Damien, towards her sisters, and towards her family; the feelings she absolutely didn't want to lose would remain untouched.
Perhaps there were consequences to this decision. She may not ever get the chance to reach the heights she could've reached if she didn't preserve these feelings.
But that didn't matter to her. In the first place, Ruyue didn't chase the peak.
She chased power so she could protect herself, so she'd never end up in a situation like her childhood ever again.
The world was dull to her. Power was the same. But the deployment notice did have some color, since it was her dear husband who'd created it.
Perhaps she wouldn't gain much from this excursion, but she'd be helping him by killing his enemies, so she really didn't mind.
That was pretty much half of the reason she'd been training, anyway.
The world would continue to lose color no matter what she did.
But it was fine as long as the colors returned where it really mattered.
This was the permanent sacrifice Ruyue had made, whether out of ambition or pride.
And it was a sacrifice she'd accepted wholeheartedly.
However
Was her pessimism backed by reality, or was it just a reflection of the indifference she was cursed with?
Was it truly impossible for her world to regain color?
lightsvel The answer was unknown for now, but there was one fact that would never change.
No matter how much one thought one knew about the world, no matter how dull and bland the world could seem at times
It would always surprise its inhabitants with things they'd never expect.
It was truly a place of miracles, so who was Ruyue to say that anything was impossible?
Right now, there was no way for her to understand it. But maybe, just maybe, the world would one day show her something that made her reevaluate everything.
But that
That was a story for another time.
The most uptodat𝓮 n𝒐vels are published on (f)reew𝒆(b)novel.𝗰𝗼𝐦