190 WHO DID THAT TO YOU?
Sometimes, when Chaos didn’t move at all, sleeping like dead, Zuri was worried.
She would come closer to him and watch his chest move slowly and evenly, only then could she back away and lessen her anxiety because he was still breathing.
This sucked, the situation sucked and what Zuri felt right now did not make things better for her. She wanted to get rid of these unsettling feelings and go closer to Chaos, but she couldn’t do that.
The repulsion would return whenever she was too close to him and she would end up feeling disgusted with herself and the more she felt that way, the more she hated herself for not being able to be closer to him.
There was a time when she told herself that it was not Chaos’ fault for what had happened to her and he was not Emmet. She had killed that man in the worst way possible, but in the next second, she would find herself blaming everything that had happened to her on Chaos.
She would curse at him, but then feel bad because she had done so. She was unstable and being in the same room with Chaos and going through that roller coaster of emotions had drained her greatly.
Even so, she didn’t want to step out of this room. Who could guarantee that Chaos wouldn’t disappear again all of a sudden?
People come and go from this room and Zuri had never really paid attention to them, until they gave up talking to her and only made sure she didn’t starve herself.
Seeing Chaos messed up her mind, but here she was, standing next to his bed because she was worried that he was dead.
.....
How could he have died when the god of the underworld was his old friend?
But, Zuri stretched out her hand anyway to feel his pulse against the tips of her fingers and immediately pulled her hand from him before this feeling overwhelmed her. She just needed to make sure that he was still alive.
But then, Chaos opened his eyes and caught her hand.
He was staring at her, but he was not staring at her, as his dark eyes were empty. He was staring into the distance.
He was blind and the fact hurt her.
“I am alive,” said Chaos hoarsely all of a sudden.
Zuri felt her throat very dry, she didn’t know how to respond to that, but seeing his hand wrapped around her bare wrist made her sick. “Let me go,” she whispered, to hold back her tears. She hated it. Why should she cry at a time like this?
Chaos remained that way for a moment before he spoke in the same low tone, his voice was exactly like what Zuri remembered, but it was a little bit cold.
“I will let you go, but you have to stay,” Chaos said. He could feel that Zuri was trembling. He didn’t know what made her like this and why she refused to be touched.
“Okay,” Zuri replied quietly and felt his hand loosen up around her wrist, as she fell down to her knees and sat down on the cold floor. She hugged herself like she used to. To keep herself together, so she wouldn’t break apart into pieces.
There was silence that ensued afterward, as the darkness blanketed them. The night sky was so murky without the light of the moon and day came very late when you were in this kind of serenity.
Zuri thought Chaos had fallen asleep again, but then he broke the stillness around them.
“How long?” Chaos asked.
Zuri knew what he wanted to know. “Eight years.”
“Something happened to you.” That was not a question, but a statement and Zuri didn’t answer that, neither did she say anything about it.
And once again, silence came and this time, Zuri tried to look anywhere else except at Chaos. She felt that statement hit her hard. This feeling was so raw and she was clueless as to how to deal with it.
Chaos said nothing again after that.
===================
“Bring me that,” Chaos said, as he nodded to the tray of food beside his bed. He knew that Zuri had just walked into this room after Anne brought his lunch and took his breakfast that he didn’t touch at all.
“You could have asked Anne earlier,” Zuri said, as she stood a good distance away from him.
Yet, Chaos said nothing and stayed still like usual, leaving Zuri with no other choice but to come over and put the tray on his lap.
Zuri hesitated when she watched how Chaos tried to locate the food on the tray. He had a good sense about his surroundings, but the fact that he couldn’t see, was troubling him some times.
“Do you want me to help you?” Zuri asked dubiously, as she took a step closer to his bed.
Chaos then pushed the tray, indicating that he would receive her help.
Seeing that, Zuri pulled a chair closer to the bed and took the tray from his lap, but her fingers brushed against his accidentally and she almost dropped the entire meal, if it was not for Chaos who caught the tray right in time.
He handed the tray over to her and Zuri carefully took it. Holding the part where she wouldn’t touch him again.
It was stupid of her to offer this kind of help when she was barely able to stand being so close to him.
Zuri tried to stop her trembling hand when she brought the spoon closer to his lips, but Chaos spoke before that.
“Who did that to you?” he asked, his voice so calm and his expression devoid of any emotion, but his eyes a few shades darker.
The spoon stopped mid- air, as Zuri tried to compose herself.
“I don’t know what you are talking about.”
“I am blind, not dumb.”
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