Chapter 273
It was late at night. Cadel searched for the carriage, but the coachman who would take them to the swamp was nowhere to be seen. It was too far to walk. He drew a traveling magic circle in the unlit alley. His hands shook as he channeled the mana, and his face was white enough to stand out in the darkness.
Van could only watch it all unfold. Cadel was desperate as if his life depended on it. His earlier calmness was gone, and he looked strained, almost choking with fear.
Come here.
Cadel, completing the magic circle, gestured. Van stared at him wordlessly, then took a slow step forward. A blinding light blinded him as the circle was activated.
If you go over there, you will see him. He was around there.
They arrived in the center of the swamp. It was near the seal circle. Cadel lit a fireball to light the way. He hadnt worn his magic boots, so his pants quickly became damp. It was the same even if he walked to avoid the swamp.
Despite his reduced mobility, Cadel pushed on. He stepped on the edge of the swamp, slipped, and nearly fell several times. Each time, Van, who was behind him, caught him, but Cadel didnt even realize it. He didnt realize he was falling, or that the swamp was dangerous. He was oblivious to everything, and all he seemed to be thinking about was meeting Kunra.
Just a little further. Just a little bit.
The speed of Van chasing Cadel gradually slowed down. He slowly stopped and looked at Cadels back. Unspeakable emotions flickered in his darkened golden eyes.
Commander.
At the faint call, Cadel straightened up. Van moved toward him, closing the distance that no longer separated them. He grasped his thin wrist and pulled Cadel gently to him. Cadels limp body sank into Vans arms.
Ill go on my own.
He stroked a soothing hand down Cadels shivering back. He hugged the pitiful body tightly, then gently pulled away. He rubbed Cadels tear-streaked cheeks.
What is so scary? If its so scary, why is he so desperate to tell me about it?
Were just going to go straight down this way, right? Ill meet him on my own. About what Commander said I had no idea what you were talking about. So I just have to ask.
Van didnt want to know. Even though he didnt know what was what, he had an instinctive aversion to it.
But if it was his own ignorance that was causing Cadel so much pain, he had no choice but to know.
So Commander, please go back.
He forced a smile in front of Cadels blank face. With a sweep of his shoulder, Van walked past Cadel, who showed no sign of following. As the gaze on his back faded, Vans expression hardened with anxiety.
Eventually, he saw the image of a man in the distance, and his heart started pounding helplessly.
* * *
Oof Bleghh!
Cadel slumped against the wall at the mouth of the alley and gagged for a long time, throwing up nothing but stale gastric juices, his heart pounding in his throat.
Gasp Ughh!
A kind of fear he had never felt before paralyzed his entire body. Even after he said everything, he didnt feel the relief of a burden lifted. He was just scared. Terrified. Terrified of how Van would react when he heard his inexcusable sins from Kunra. Terrified of the contempt Van would show, terrified to the point of madness.
His brain felt like it was constricting. His vision faded in and out of black, and his body felt weak. The aftermath was even more overwhelming than when Kunra told him the truth.
Hughhh.
He crouched in the corner, sobbing uncontrollably, biting his lip and swallowing his sobs. He staggered to his feet and took a moment to catch his breath.
He glanced back in the direction of the darkened street, where Van would be. What if he ran to Van now and prevented him from hearing the truth, that he had lost his mind for a moment, that Van was right, that he was acting strangely out of stress.
Imagined, but that was it. Cadel could no longer deceive Van. From the moment his loyalty became a burden, it was a foregone conclusion.
He turned and walked back to the castle. He clenched his fists a few times as if resisting an impulse, but that was all.
* * *
Cadel waited for Van all morning, but he never showed up. Cadel couldnt sleep. He curled up on his bed and buried his head in his knees, imagining a million things in the agonizing passage of time.
No tears came, only a dry shudder. His stomach twisted in agony. He lifted his stiff head, and the first rays of the morning sun shone through.
Van didnt come. There was no system window announcing his departure. Did he not go to Kunra? Did he just pretend to go? What if he did? Should Cadel drag him back to Kunra? Or should he just pretend like he didnt know.
Knock knock.
A knock was heard. The place where the sound came from was not the door. His head reflexively turned to face the window next to the bed. Lydon, in the form of a little fairy, was waving his hand as if he was happy to see Cadel.
Cadel shifted his stiff legs to open the window, and as soon as Lydon was back in his humanoid form, he pulled Cadel into a hug.
Sigh, I missed you, darling! I tried to come by yesterday, but Lumen wouldnt let me interrupt your rest. He asked if I wanted to get scolded again, so I held back. Did I do well? Did you get a good nights rest?
Lydon, who was kissing the top of Cadels head, slightly pulled away. Cadel wasnt looking at him. Normally, there should be a response, whether it is annoyance or soothing.
Lydon tilted his head, looking dazed. He leaned down and locked eyes with Cadel, a puzzled expression on his face.
Cadel? Where does it hurt?
No, Im good.
Hmm.
It was obvious that something wasnt right. But there was no reason to suspect anything. The best Lydon could draw was that Cadel was exhausted from yesterdays battle.
Lydon stopped examining Cadel and grabbed his wrist.
Lets go to my room. I told them to bring Cadels food to my room, so lets eat together.
Cadels actions were arbitrary and unasked for, but Lydons demeanor was confident. Lydon knew Cadel wouldnt be angry, so he turned to storm out of the room, but Cadel grabbed his arm and held him back.
Lydon.
Yeah?
By any chance.
He lowered his eyes and pursed his lips. Cadel took a small, deep breath, like he was asking a big question, and then spoke in a hushed voice.
Do you know where Van is?
Van?
Didnt you see him?
I did.
A shiver ran through the hand that gripped Lydons arm. Lydons eyes narrowed as he looked at Cadel. He turned and grabbed Cadels chin, who couldnt make eye contact with him, and lifted it. His red eyes reflected Cadels expression, slightly contorted.
Hmm, did Van do something weird?
Its not like that. Where did you see him?
He was outside practicing on his own.
Van was back. That fact alone made Cadels heart race like crazy. It didnt even occur to him that Van hadnt come back to find him, just that Van hadnt left him. It was a relief, but it was also unsettling.
Either he didnt go to Kunra after all, or Kunra didnt tell him enough. Or he heard it all and didnt believe it..
Cadel couldnt understand why, knowing everything, Van didnt express any resentment. Maybe he was organizing his thoughts, and if so, how should Cadel behave? Naturally? Without coming across as too shameless?
The more he thought about it, the more he was lost.
Do you want me to scold him?
Lydons face came into view, closer and closer. Cadel forced the corners of his mouth to tug upward, realizing he must look strange. It was an awkward smile, but it was the best he could do.
Who is scolding whom? Van doesnt do anything wrong.
Then whats with the look on your face?
Whats with the look on my face? Im just exhausted from lack of sleep.
You know, Cadel.
Lydon lowered the hand clutching Cadels chin to wrap around Cadels shoulder. A smooth, slippery hand slid over his upper arm and the inside of his wrist, taking Cadels hand in his own. Tightly clasped, he pressed a brief kiss to the top of Cadels forehead.
I wont forgive anyone who makes Cadel suffer.
.
Because youre my human.
With that, Lydon smiled lightly. After kissing Cadels cheek and eyelids a few more times, he released his grip and shook their entwined hands. Cadel stared blankly into Lydons clear eyes, then slowly nodded his head.
Im hungry. Lets go to your room.
Okay! I didnt know what Cadel would like, so I told them to bring different types.
Didnt you just want to have a variety?
Ahaha! Correct!
He was dragged out of the room by Lydons hand. He should be hungry, after starving himself all day, but the truth was, Cadel didnt want to put anything in his mouth. He didnt even want to eat to cheer himself up. He just couldnt turn away Lydon, who had been looking for him since morning.
Cadel, who had been quietly following Lydon behind him, suddenly stopped and buried his nose in Lydons back. As he cupped his numb nose and narrowed his eyes, Lydon called out a familiar name.
Van, are you done training already? When are you going to become stronger if you only move so little?
Better than you, who doesnt move an inch.
It was Vans voice. His heart, barely calmed, began to pound again. Cadel stayed behind Lydon and swallowed dryly. He couldnt muster the courage to appear in front of him.
After a few words back to Lydon, who was arguing, Van turned to Cadel, who was standing behind him.
Commander.
The familiar title weighed heavily on him. The firmly closed lips twitched, and Cadel slipped out from behind Lydon, his heart dropping once more at the direct stare.
Van.
What kind of expression was Van making? Expressionless? Sharp expression? Displeased expression? Resignation? Many faces were envisioned, but the face that was finally revealed had the same friendly smile as always.
He treated Cadel as if what happened yesterday was nothing, as if it was normal.
Good morning.
There was no guessing what that nonchalant demeanor meant, so all Cadel could do was act it out with all his might.
Yeah. Good morning.
This content is taken from (f)reewe(b)novel.𝗰𝗼𝐦