My throat dried up and my fingers trembled.
Even though my gaze was foggy, I ignored it all and rushed past the door.
"Dawn! Dawn!"
On my knees, I snapped my fingers and potions came fluttering into my hands. With trembling hands, I pulled the caps open and poured the potion over her stomach.
"Fuck fuck fuck… w-what… just what…"
Words spilled on their own.
My mind spun around in circles, unable to understand anything. I tried to pour the potions on her, but I didn't see much improvement.
Blood kept pouring out of her stomach.
"C-corruption…?"
"No… dumbass…" With a pained voice, Dawn raised her hand and placed it on mine. "You're… spilling it…"
"Ah… ah… d-don't talk. P-potion…potion…"
My entire body trembled. Nothing came in my eyes, everything was a blur. A soft ringing spread through my ears but I somehow pulled through. Did I pull through? I couldn't tell at all.
Sizzling sounds rang out loud as the potion seeped into her wound.
My teeth clattered, refusing to calm down.
"W-why… how…"
Dawn's palm on my hands slipped off, and her neck fell limp.
"No no no!"
Suddenly, a warm feeling seeped over my neck.
"Eugene…"
"D-dantalian! P-potion, get me more potions!"
"Shush…"
Dantalian's voice seeped into my ears.
"Bring her inside. She won't die yet."
Won't die…?
At the calming voice that seemed to soothe away all my troubles, I looked down again.
My hands and clothes were soaked with blood, the same blood that was seeping all over the place.
Dawn's wings had fell open and a wide hole was left in her shirt while her stomach started healing, slow, but it healed.
"Relax, there is magic erosion, she's an angel at that so healing is many times as effective."
Ah…
That's right….
My breathing remained heavy, but my head started to calm down.
How…
"Dantalian…" I held Dawn as I slowly turned to my back. "What the fuck did you just do…?"
"You have been cozying up to this one for a while anyway, isn't it fine—"
"Shut up. Did you forget who commands who here?"
Tightening the grip around my neck, Dantalian leaned closer to my ears and whispered. "I am sorry…"
Sorry?
That useless word. Did that solve anything?
"She'll not be a variable in our plans now. And once you're done with her… you can keep her with you forever."
Variable?
Dawn… was a variable?
"You'll forgive me, right Eugene?"
Forgiveness.
"We only have each other, right Eugene? Only you and I. Look, I am the trash that tried to kill this girl, and you're the trash who let it happen."
I.
Let it happen.
This was my fault.
"You don't deserve her anyway. You're a trash, that should just stick with me."
"Ah…"
"Bring her in, Eugene."
I slowly lifted Dawn's body up.
Placing my ear on her chest, I heard for a heartbeat.
Faint, but it was there.
Wasn't this fine?
Once I am done, I could leave her be… till then, if she doesn't move she'll be safe… this was perfect.
My eyes blurred over once again and I slowly started walking back into my room.
A spell swept up her blood, and the door closed behind me. Dantalian giddily walked over and watched me place Dawn on the bed.
Her hands wrapped around my neck again.
"It's great! You can keep her here forever now."
"Y-you'll kill her…"
"And why does that matter? You don't feel anything for her anyway, do you? Weren't all of those feeling's that 'Eugene's'?"
"I… not…"
"Well, I don't care. If she's going to stay put you can use her to please yourself whenever you want. I might join in too!"
"What do you—"
"We're going to do that, right?"
My heart pressed against my chest.
I couldn't breath.
My blurry eyes already couldn't see anything, but now everything turned dark.
"Yes…" I answered...
"Fufu… both you and that original are just the same, what cuties."
Dantalian pecked my cheeks.
"Why don't you start your nightly routine, Eugene? Go workout and take a shower."
That's right.
I had a routine.
I had a long day tomorrow.
Dawn was… fine…
I ignored them and got to my routine. It was all fine if I was growing stronger…
"What are you looking at, insect?"
"Nothing, demon bitch."
"Do you have a problem?"
"Not at all, just make sure your ass is covered."
"Hm?"
I was growing stronger…
***
My eyes didn't fix themselves till the end.
I went into the bathtub, but this time I really drowned until Dantalian pulled me out.
I didn't want to move, I couldn't move.
"Raise your hands, Eugene. Let's get you changed."
Yes, this was fine.
"Good boy, now sit down."
I could leave it all to Dantalian.
She helped me change into cleaner clothes and pulled me to the bed.
"Ah, this bitch is still here. Should I push her down—"
"No!"
I yelled.
"I-I'll sleep… on the ground… so it's fine…"
"Hmm," Dantalian poked my nose with her fingers. "If you say so, good job taking initiative, Eugene."
Right.
I was doing good.
Tomorrow.
From tomorrow it was all going to be fine again.
The moonlight seeped into the room, along with it the flutters of the auroras created by the magic tower. They must have. It was what happened every night.
Dantalian pulled me down, and I toppled on the sheets.
She held me in her hands and kissed me.
"You did good, Eugene."
I nodded.
I still couldn't see.
I still couldn't breath.
But this was making it all easier.
"Goodnight, Eugene."
I just…
Had to fall asleep.
I only needed to fall asleep, and it would all be good.
But.
But.But.But.But.But.But.But.But.But.But.But.But.But.
[If I am going to live while being ignored by you then I don't want to live]
I couldn't even do that.
I couldn't fall asleep.
No matter how much I tried.
I couldn't fall asleep.
Slow breathing fell on my ears.
Dantalian must have fallen asleep.
Labored breaths followed.
Dawn…
But still, I couldn't sleep.
It was all okay, wasn't it?
As long as I was growing strong, it was all okay.
So why?
Why couldn't I sleep?
The contents of my stomach floated up to my mouth.
I twisted myself off the ground and stood up.
Bathroom, I needed to go to the bathroom, but I still couldn't see.
My feet thudded against each other as I walked, almost falling to the ground.
My hand landed on a knob which I twisted open.
"There you go… partner…"
The door swung open and I stepped out.
My vision was still dark and hazy.
I took a step to the side, but the ground was gone.
"Ah!"
My head slammed against the walls and I toppled down the stairs.
Was I outside?
My body rolled down the stairs before slamming into the wall at the bottom.
I couldn't see.
"Ah…"
I couldn't see anything.
Pained groans left me over and over.
Why?
Why was I suffering?
These weren't mine.
Someone…
Right then, soft sounds seeped into my ears.
Piano…
Someone was playing the piano…
"Ah… ah…"
I groaned and stood up.
I couldn't see anything, but I could hear.
I could hear the tune.
My feet moved on their own as I dragged myself to the sounds.
I recognized the notes.
I recognized the piece.
Valse Romantique. Why?
I tripped. I toppled. I fell.
Dozens and dozens of times, I dropped to the ground.
But as if pulling me closer, the sounds didn't stop.
I kept moving toward it. Toward the music.
A door opened on its own.
The sounds were at a peak.
There, my vision started coming back.
Blurry, hazy, I could see again.
In front of a piano sat a woman with a veil on her face.
"Ah…"
The piece continued.
But I didn't move.
I couldn't move.
It stopped.
The woman turned to the side and got up on her feet.
Step, and then another.
She walked closer.
I tried to move back, but toppled down backward.
She came closer.
I tried to crawl back.
But I was too slow.
"Ah… ah… d-don't…" moans left my lips over and over.
She didn't stop.
She didn't listen…
She lowered herself in front of me.
"No…"
I winced and turned my face away—
When warms hands wrapped around my back.
"Ah…"
"I'm here…"
Warmth.
Warmth filled my chest.
The pounding increased but different from before.
The pain increased, but it was likable now.
My eyes cleared up and so did my head.
"Ahh…"
"I am here…"
Something wet dabbed my eyes.
And then, it seeped down my cheeks.
One after another, like drops of rain, something kept falling from my eyes. Something I had never felt before.
My heart screamed, but this time my lips could follow.
"AAAAHH!"
I was crying.
Tears kept streaming down my eyes as I screamed my heart out.
"I am here…"
She said.
"I don't know! Why… why am I suffering? This is not my life! These aren't my emotions… so why… why… why does my heart ache?"
"They are yours."
"Who am I…?"
Lethe held me tighter.
"I don't even know who I am…"
"You don't need to know…"
She said.
"I'll know who are you are. Always and always. So you don't need to know."
Tears kept streaming down.
"I don't love Eugene Hall or Yujin Han."
My breath stopped.
"I love you."
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