Nicholas found Sophie was being stubborn for no good reason. So... what made her suddenly decide to go out of the palace and where would she live?
"Sophie, please.. think about the kids. It's dangerous out there. You must stay in the palace to be safe. You don't have anyone to protect you and the kids outside of the palace."
"You can send knights to protect us secretly," Sophie said stubbornly. "However, I really don't want to stay in the royal palace with you."
Nicholas looked at Sophie with a confused expression and heartbroken.
So... she must actually hate him so much by now that Sophie couldn't even stand living under his roof when she was at the lowest point of her life. Bitterly, Nicholas remembered how Sophie came to Leland many years ago asking for protection when she was alone and in danger.
However, when she was put in the same situation, Sophie refused to seek him for help. Nicholas had to come to force her to take the kids to his palace. And now that weeks passed by, she decided she didn't want to continue to stay.
This made his heart ache. He thought Sophie would never forgive him for leaving her in the past and now she didn't want to have anything to do with him, except for the boys. Did she really think being alone was better than relying on Nicholas to help her?
"Why...?" Nicholas looked at Sophie deeply. The woman looked away and didn't immediately answer him. Nicholas became dejected. He had regretted what happened in the past many times over, but there was nothing he could do to change the past.
Was he really unforgivable?
"If you really hate me for leaving you eight years ago and could never forgive me, and that's the reason why you don't want to stay here... I understand," Nicholas spoke with a hoarse voice.
He continued, "I am very sorry. I wish I could turn back time and change the past. I was young and foolish back then. I made a terrible decision and I have regretted it for the past year, and probably until the day I die..."
Sophie turned to Nicholas and looked at him in surprise. Nicholas thought she hated him and didn't want to forgive him for the past?
"What are you talking about?" she asked in a low voice. "I don't hate you..."
"You would rather be alone than let me help you and protect you... So, it means being around me is worse than facing so many difficulties and challenges on your own. Your decision shows that my presence in your life is unwanted," Nicholas explained. "If that didn't come from a place of hate or resentment... I don't know what is."
He truly thought she hated him and didn't want to have anything to do with him, but got stuck to have some sort of relationship because they had children together. Sophie felt really sad for him.
Nicholas had misunderstood her. The truth was, she never hated him, and she didn't even resent him for the past. She understood his situation and she could see how much he loved Luciel and Jan and tried to make up for all his mistakes in the past, which were not even purely his fault.
What happened between them was a series of bad luck, coupled with slight bad decisions from being young and inexperienced. Besides, without what happened in the past, Sophie would have never met Leland again and had a happy life with him. So, of course, she would never blame nor resent Nicholas.
Sophie could tell that it pained Nicholas so much when he found out everything and he had been working hard to make sure he could become a good father for their sons without causing any discomfort in Sophie's and Leland's relationship.
He had been careful with his words and actions, respectful of their boundaries, and was always do his best to make sure Sophie and the children were taken care of. When they were safe and happy with Leland, he stepped back and let them be. When Leland abandoned them, he immediately stepped in.
And now, he thought everything he did for them was not welcome and unwanted because Sophie only wanted to leave... and it was understandable. However, Nicholas was mistaken.
Sophie bit her lip. Should she tell him the real reason why she wanted to leave? But she really didn't want him to keep holding her back.
"It's not you, Nic," she spoke hoarsely. "You are a good man and I respect you. I have nothing against you. I have my own reasons why I want to leave."
"So... you don't resent me?" Nicholas couldn't believe his hearing. Sophie nodded.
Nicholas looked at Sophie with tears forming in his eyes. Her eyes were staring at him with pain evident in them, but Nicholas couldn't see any hatred or resentment... So, she was not lying.
His heart was filled with so much warmth. So, he misunderstood.
He and Sophie had never had the chance to talk about their past because Leland was always between them. Nicholas and Sophie had a history together that was not resolved and before today, it seemed they would never be able to have this conversation.
So, they both had just brushed it off and accepted that the past belonged in the past. At present, Sophie was Leland's mate, so she was no longer Nicholas' wife.
However, now that Leland was gone, Nicholas was standing before Sophie with so many emotions running through his mind, and he was tempted to have a sit down with Sophie and finally talk about their past and the fact that she was actually legally still his wife.
"Sophie, can we... sit down and talk?" Nicholas asked Sophie politely.
Sophie wanted to say no, but seeing Nicholas' sincerity, she didn't have the heart to reject his request. She also couldn't beat to keep letting him misunderstand. Sooner or later he would find out anyway and Sophie still need to have that conversation with him.
"Luciel and Jan, can you take Jack with you to play?" Sophie turned to her older sons. Luciel immediately took Jack from the floor and, together with Jan, he did what their mother asked.
"Call us when you are done, Mom," said Luciel. Sophie nodded.
The boys immediately disappeared behind the door. Once there were only the two of them, Sophie turned to Nicholas and asked, "What is it that you wanted to talk about?"
Nicholas sat on the sofa and motioned Sophie to sit too. "It's better to talk while sitting, don't you think?"
Sophie nodded. She sat gracefully across from Nicholas, with little Anne on her lap. The baby was asleep and Sophie rubbed her head lovingly.
"Thank you for seeing me," said Nicholas. He took a deep breath and composed himself. He wanted to have this conversation with Sophie as smoothly as possible. "I have been so worried about you and the kids for weeks. How are the babies doing?"
"Jack is now healthy but Anne is still sick," replied Sophie. Before Nicholas could ask further, she continued her explanation. "The royal doctors are doing their best to treat her, and we are grateful."
Sophie added, "However, they said Anne is just a weak baby. There is nothing wrong with her body that they could find. I do still think Anne is sick but I am not a doctor and I don't know what happened."
"That is also another reason why I want to leave the palace. Anne no longer needs the doctors here because they can't even know what is wrong with her," Sophie said.
"Another reason? What is the other one?" Nicholas asked.
Sophie was quiet. She bit her lip, trying to look tough but slowly a drop of tear fell down her cheek.
"I am pregnant," Sophie finally spoke with a low voice. "In a few months I will give birth to Leland's baby and I have to immediately establish a new life for all of us. I cannot keep becoming your burden by staying here and leeching on you."
Nicholas thought he dreaming. Was Sophie really talking now? Why did she sound like she was speaking from a place really far away? He slowly lost her voice as his head spun in a headache.
So, Sophie was now pregnant?
Sophie continued speaking softly, " Nic, you are a good man but I don't want to bother you for much longer. You are only responsible for Luciel and Jan and you have done more than enough. Right now, I have to step up and become everything my other children need. I have to build a new home for myself and my children and raise them with my own strength. I don't want to rely on anyone from now on."
She looked at Nicholas sincerely. "I will buy a place for me and the children and live there. You can give us protection by sending your undercover knights. That way you don't have to worry about us."
Nicholas's voice trembled when he finally spoke. "You are... pregnant?"
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