Chapter 311 Volume V - Chapter 29: With Appearance No Longer Hidden
After Aiden nodded his head in satisfaction and Alaric sighed slightly, there was silence between us again.
Everything in order... Okay, I don't have a problem with that. I'm patient, I can wait. But that doesn't mean that I want to be a puppet, that I want to do everything they say.
"You said you are trying to make me not be a puppet. How are you going to do that, then...?"
"By following a plan other than the plan of those who want you to be a puppet. Because if we follow their plan, the person you end up becoming is not someone who can help us, but someone who will stand against us."
Oh, so it doesn't really matter what I am... If what he said wasn't going to happen, would he let me become a puppet?
I'm not sure whether I should trust him or not.
"Since this is your consciousness, there's not much you can do even if you wanted to. Learning how to use caora will come after you wake up. It won't take you long to wake up anyway, at least for us. Just... do what you've been doing, Ethan. Even though you're walking a path created by others, you can choose the steps you take and how you walk it. That's what I'm asking you to do."
He paused for a moment and I frowned slightly, deciding to ask a small question that had been on my mind.
"Did they shape the twenty-one years of my life as Ethan, on Earth? Is it because of them that I never made a single friend? Is it because of them that my family abandoned me? Did I... Did I live those twenty-one years as a preparation for this world?"
Aiden didn't give any answer.
And he was aware that his silence was an answer, as I was too.
I looked up at the sky, then closed my eyes, and let out a deep... really deep sigh.
Why didn't I ever think of this...? When I came into this world, making friends was even easier than it should have been. I was not a person with bad social skills... But in my previous life, I never had a single 'real' friend. Not even one.
People talked to me, communicated with me, yes, but... No matter what my achievements were, no matter how hard I tried, I had never been able to connect with anyone socially. I had lost myself in this strangeness because I had lived like this for twenty-one years, and when I came to this world, I didn't realize it because I was hiding behind my new identity.
But this was the reality.
A puppet... No matter how much Aiden says he's trying to make me not be a puppet, I am still one. I've been a puppet since the beginning. Since the day I was born. Even now, I have to learn everything in an 'order'. No matter how I choose to walk the path that has been prepared for me, I cannot change the path itself.
Are my friendships in this world also prepared? Forget friendships, what about the person I consider my own sister? Aiden himself is the reason I'm so attached to her... Does that make our bond a fake one then?
I sighed again as I shook my head slightly from side to side.
No... I've already told her who I really am. No matter how fake our bond is, it doesn't change the fact that I see her as my sister. I can't throw away everything that's already happened when she's starting to see me as her brother too.
Like this, in the middle of this endless field of grass... I finally opened my eyes again.
I will not trust them.
Not Aiden, not the Lords, not anyone involved in this. I will not trust anyone except those who are truly close to me.
Future threats... Even with a total of two loops involving Aiden, they couldn't save Lunerra. If I ignore Aiden, there have already been a total of nine loops... With this fact, I will not blindly believe that I can defeat them on my own.
Just as they can use me to achieve their goals... I can use them to achieve mine. That's what I'm going to do.
My own purpose for coming into this world was to have a happy ending. In this happy ending, to live a peaceful life with the people I am close to, to build a beautiful future. My purpose hasn't changed. I just... learned some unpleasant truths, that's all.
So, I'm going to keep doing what I've been doing from the very beginning. I'm going to get stronger, I'm going to rise to the top of this world.
Of course, first, I have to wake up from the coma I'm in... But since Aiden said I'll wake up soon, that shouldn't be a problem either. For now... all I can do is wait, like he said.
*******
The first thing I did... was to prepare myself by taking a deep breath. Inside the car, which had just stopped moving, I was a little nervous.
After all, it was the first time I was actually going to go out in public without disguising myself. Even though my necklace was still around my neck, my ears were still pointed and my appearance was closer to that of an elf.
Still, I couldn't wait in the car forever. Knowing this... I finally opened the door and got out.
The sunlight was the first thing to hit my face. The summer breeze that followed was something I had been waiting for. The huge south gate of the Academy was as imposing as ever. The buildings and the academy itself, more or less visible behind it, were even more mesmerizing.
But that was not the only thing in front of me. There were people everywhere. The academy's security guards, students, staff, and more... Although I didn't attract much attention the first time I got out of the car, as I stood where I was, some people started to notice my presence.
The first person I saw noticing me was a student. He looked like an ordinary person. He was a little older than me. But the moment he saw me, he went rigid for a brief moment. Immediately after him... others slowly saw me.
I saw a few people whispering among themselves. I saw eyes with many different emotions and thoughts behind them.
I sighed lightly and took the first step toward the south gate.
You were under the same gazes before... Only this time, there are more of them and I am in a different situation. The only thing different from before is my appearance, that's all. There is no need to be so tense...
I heard the car that took me to the academy leave. And right after that, I heard someone whispering to another.
"It's true..."
It was only two words. But those two words made me realize what he was talking about easily.
Are there already rumors about me...? Only a few people had seen me at the festival, so I thought the academy would try to keep it a bit under wraps... But it seems I was wrong.
When I arrived in front of the south gate, I looked toward the security guard who was going to check my ID.
The guard was just like the others. There was a slight curiosity in his eyes, jealousy, and more. Still, he was a security guard and he hadn't forgotten his duty.
He took my student card that I handed to him and checked it. When the system verified my identity, the south gate of the academy opened for me.
The inside was no different from the outside. Students, staff, and more... Again, everyone was looking in my direction. Nevertheless, I kept walking toward the dormitories, trying not to pay attention to any of them.
I entered the dormitory building. I watched a student on the elevator going up with me, sweating, afraid to make eye contact, just standing there with his head bowed. Finally, when I entered my room... I just let myself fall to the floor.
No... it's not like before. Before, it was only jealousy or admiration. Now... now it's completely different. The way everyone goes silent the moment I enter a place, the way literally every single person in that place locks their gaze on me, it feels so different and... heavy compared to the previous times.
I forced myself to stand up and threw myself straight onto my bed without turning anywhere else. I wanted to get some rest... but I didn't do that. Instead, I opened my watch, the new one I had been given because the previous one had broken, and checked the news.
Just as I had predicted, one of the main topics on the news across the kingdom was... me.
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Just as I was looking at the news, the news was suddenly updated. A new headline was suddenly uploaded to the breaking news tab.
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Huh...? Wh- what? That fast?
I quickly clicked on the news and then on the video at the top.
It was really me. Everything from the moment I got out of the car to the moment I walked through the south gate was on the video. It looked like someone in the crowd had taken the video.
I was... definitely not expecting this.
As I closed the holographic screen in front of me with a sigh, I let the silence in my room fall for a moment. It wasn't hard to imagine what I would wake up to tomorrow. First of all, Julian and the others would probably try to contact me directly...
So, I closed my eyes as I let myself sink into the comfort of my bed. I wanted to get a good night's sleep.
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