Chapter 104 Volume III - Chapter 25: A Broken Daughter
Before me stood the man who had once been the head of the best guild in the kingdom, the head of one of the most influential noble families in the kingdom, even if he was no longer in the same position, but to anyone looking at him now, he was just... broken.
So broken that if I blew on him he would shatter into pieces.
"She won't eat, she barely drinks water, she refuses to come out of her room, she cries, and whoever she makes eye contact with is terrified and starts screaming. Do you know how I felt when I saw my daughter like that?"
He clenched his fist again. He clenched it so hard that I saw red between his fingers. The blood mixed with the rain and slowly trickled down his hand.
"Guilt."
"Guilt. Guilt for not giving her a normal life. Guilt for creating a boss-employee relationship between us rather than a father-daughter. Guilt for not giving her enough attention. Guilt for not being there for her..."
His soulless eyes turned to me and a smile appeared on his face.
His bitter smile lacked the joy, the pleasant feeling of a normal smile. It was full of emotions he couldn't hide: sorrow, longing, and regret.
"Still... thank you. Thank you for protecting my daughter. Thank you for taking her into your group at the academy, for making her happy. I don't give a damn who you are, what you stand for, Aiden Tenebra. Not as a guild or family leader, but as Ronald Potenbea, Celine's incompetent father. At least for being there for her instead of me, for trying to be there for her, even if that wasn't your goal."
With a bitter smile on his face, he finally stretched slightly and stood up.
Even this simple gesture of the man in whom I used to find grace and nobility in every little gesture was hobbled.
"I just wanted to say, thank you for listening to this old man, Aiden. If you ever need help, don't hesitate to come to me and I will do my best."
Ronald Potenbea looked at me one last time. He opened his mouth almost imperceptibly, he was going to say something, but he was silent. His smile fell, and I could see something in his soulless eyes.
I felt something stirring inside me, but I couldn't think too much about it, because I was too busy cursing myself as the sorrowful man I had just spoken to walked slowly away from me with his limping steps.
I... I wasn't there for Celine, on the contrary, I walked up to her with a disgusting smile on my face. Adrian says he doesn't know, but... I might have even hurt her.
I don't deserve any thanks. Celine is suffering in her room even now and all I do is loaf around. I'm the one who put her in this situation, and yet I'm not even having a hard time smiling.
I'm an asshole, so I should at least try to deserve this 'thank you'.
"Can I see her?"
Ronald Potenbea paused. I quickly interjected.
"You thanked me. You thanked me, but... I don't deserve it. If I really deserved it, we wouldn't be having this conversation at all. Celine wouldn't be in this situation and neither would anyone else at the academy. That's why I want to at least try, to see for myself the consequences of my mistake, to correct it if I can."
He turned away, his soulless eyes fixed on mine. And then a smile appeared on his face again.
That's when I realized what I had just seen in him.
He had asked for help. He hadn't told me, hadn't even thought about it, but in his eyes he had begged for help, unaware of himself. He was broken, unstable. Until now he had refused to ask for help, but it was inevitably reflected in his actions.
His smile now was not as mournful as before. It was more sincere, and for a moment he looked at me as if I were his own son.
He had accepted my help.
"You're just like me, Aiden, more like me than I thought. You believe you're going through this because you're powerless, just like the old me."
There was a flash of lightning, and then the rain got faster.
"Follow me."
So he started walking in the direction of the academy hospital without saying anything else.
As I looked at this man walking away from me in the accelerating rain, I realized once again how broken he really was.
The person walking in front of me didn't look like a legend. He had lost all the aura he had when he was in the game.
I only hated myself more when I saw someone like that... fall like that.
I'm not a hero, I'm not the one who can make everything right. The only thing I get out of every action I take is damaged people, I'm just a magnet for disaster...
I'll do my best anyway.
I clenched my fist and followed Ronald Potenbea, who kept walking away from me.
*******
We entered a large room through a wide corridor.
Inside the room, there were countless holographic screens and a door on the side leading to the room where Celine was. In short, I was now in the control room.
"You can push your luck a bit, but if you feel things are getting worse, come back quickly. There is a camera in there and it will stay on, but the voice recorder will be off. But don't forget that we can still see the patient's vital signs, stress levels, etc."
This was a warning given to me by the doctor in front of me.
They would not know what I was talking about inside. It's a private thing, but since they were monitoring Celine's behavior and vitals, it was easy for them to know if I was going to do something bad. What she was saying was basically, "Watch your behavior. We know what you're doing."
"Got it."
"Good, now..."
The Doctor looked at the holographic screens in front of her and clicked on some things, and then the door on the side opened slightly.
"You can go."
I nodded, took a deep breath, and opened the door fully.
In front of me was a corridor, not very long.
I took my first step slowly, and with each subsequent one, I only felt myself tense up even more. My steps were getting heavier, maybe I was scared.
When I finally reached the door at the end of the corridor, I opened it slowly and was greeted by a very dimly lit room.
The inside of the room was quite simple. On the right side was a bookcase full of books, a small table, and an armchair. On the left side, there was nothing but a door that I assumed led to the bathroom and a few peaceful paintings next to it.
Apart from that, there was another closed door directly opposite me and it was not hard to guess what was behind it.
I swallowed, took a deep breath, calmed myself, and stayed where I was for a short while. Finally, I made my way to that door.
I knocked a few times, slowly. But no matter how long I waited, there was no response. So my hand wrapped around the doorknob and I felt my heartbeat quicken.
Nervous, I encouraged myself and turned it a little.
But... just at that moment, a voice came from inside.
"Don't open it."
She used to always sound determined, even when she stammered she had a tone of voice that said she was a noble. But now... it was all gone, just like it had been with her father. Her voice was hoarse, as if she had been crying non-stop for a long time.
"Celi-"
"GET OUT OF HERE!"
I stiffened where I was when she suddenly shouted so forcefully, so angrily that her throat almost ruptured, on top of her previous calm and low voice.
The world crashed down on me for a moment, time just froze.
I... I hadn't imagined it like this.
"LEAVE ME ALONE!"
I felt her anger in every cell of my body, I realized how much I had underestimated what she had been through, I realized I was a fool.
I could do nothing but stand there.
*******
After long darkness, a long silence... I woke up.
My body was in an even better condition than before, as if nothing had happened, as if I had never suffered, as if I had just been born. I could feel it, yet there was nothing to think about as I stared at the white ceiling above me.
I didn't care who I was, where I was, what I was doing. And then... I remembered.
At first, I thought it was all a dream, a nightmare. After all, if what I experienced there was real, I couldn't be alive now, but at this moment reality hit me.
I was in the hospital, it was too real to be a dream. Even if it didn't hurt now, everything was in my mind as if I had just experienced it. I remembered the pain.
The appearance, the voice, and the touch of the man with the purple eyes appeared in my mind. I felt again the torture-healing cycle I had suffered so often, I remembered the moments when I felt the warmth of my own blood all over my body.
My eyes watered, I screamed, I called for help. Doctors and nurses rushed to my side, but the moment I saw their faces, fear filled my whole body.
Their eye colors slowly turned purple, their voices changed. They murmured, their lips curled upward and slowly took the shape of a smile. Memories enveloped my body again.
I thought I was having a nightmare, but as the doctors continued to walk over me with that expression, I felt something moving inside me.
I was scared, I cried. I tore my throat, I ran away from anyone who came near me.
Why?
I could think of nothing but this simple question.
Why?!
I cried even harder, biting my nails.
Why... why did he find me?!
I got tired of the nightmares, the visions I saw every time I slept. I stopped sleeping out of fear.
I ignored everyone, including my own father.
WHY?!
WHY?!
WHY?!
I didn't even know how much time had passed since I woke up. All I did was hide under my covers all day long.
But after a while... a strange feeling suddenly enveloped my body.
I couldn't understand what it was at first, but then... I remembered this alien feeling.
I heard the door handle moving.
"Don't open it."
Actually... when I think about it, isn't it his fault?
Wasn't he talking to that man when he was torturing me to death?
Isn't he responsible for what happened to me?
"Celi-"
"GET OUT OF HERE!"
Isn't he the same as that guy?
Didn't he walk on me too?
Didn't he also want to make me suffer?
That otherworldly sensation enveloped my body even more violently. I felt my head start to spin.
"LEAVE ME ALONE!"
If there was anyone I didn't want to see, it was him in particular.
If there was anyone I hated more than that man, it was him.
"Celine, I wa-"
"DO YOU KNOW WHAT I'VE BEEN THROUGH?!"
I started to tear up, my whole body trembled as that strange feeling enveloped me. I wanted not to speak, but my lips parted on their own.
"IT HURT! I WAS SCARED! I WANTED TO DIE!"
Those moments I didn't want to remember came back to me.
"ALL I COULD DO WAS SCREAM AS I WAS BEING SKINNED ALIVE!"
I don't even have a scar on my arm now, but that pain was burned into my bones in a way I will never forget.
"AS MY LEGS BURNED, ALL I COULD DO WAS WATCH THEM SLOWLY TURN TO CHARCOAL!"
It's all because of him, isn't it?
"BECAUSE OF YOU! BECAUSE... Because of you... all of it happened..."
I stopped screaming because my throat started to hurt, but the tears didn't stop. The feeling that enveloped my body became more intense. Strangely... I felt myself calming down.
"I hate... I hate my father, the nobles, the humans, you... I hate everything, all of you..."
I'm saying this, but...
Why do I feel... peaceful?
Why I don't want him to go when I take my anger out on him...?
So I realized.
That strange, otherworldly feeling was comforting me as it enveloped my body.
"Yes, it's all because of me."
His voice echoed in my ears when he finally had a chance to speak.
"I'm sorry, everything is my fault. If... if it wasn't for me, none of this would have happened. I'm sorry for bothering you Celine, if you don't want me to, I'll do my best to never appear in front of you again, but... at least I want you to know that I'll heal you, I'll find that man."
My head started to spin, again. This time even more violently.
The strange sensation that gave me peace was getting more intense. It enveloped my body even tighter, almost cleansing my thoughts.
"I'm going to find that man and I'm going to make sure he suffers the maximum pain he can suffer. I'm not going to kill him, I'm going to throw him to the bottom of a hell he'll never get out of. I will do whatever it takes to make you better, whether it takes three, five, or ten years. I will do it no matter how long it takes."
So he was silent for a moment. I heard him turn around and take a step away from me. He was walking away from me, just the way I wanted him to.
As this was happening, I realized something else.
He... doesn't sound strange when he talks to me, he doesn't suddenly start mumbling strange things.
"Goodbye."
My eyes widened for a moment.
His voice doesn't change like the others, he doesn't tell me what that man said.
"Don't go."
Aiden paused.
"Don't go..."
I don't want... I don't want the only person I can talk with to leave. I don't want this feeling that envelops my body, that comforts me, to disappear.
"D- don't go..."
I am angry with him, I hate him, I don't want to see him, I hold him guilty even though I know he is not guilty. But... I want him to stay with me, I don't want him to leave.
I... what do I feel?
What am I supposed to do? What am I supposed to feel...?
"If that's what you want, okay."
I heard him approaching me. I waited for the door to open, I was ready for it to open, but Aiden didn't open the door. Instead, he leaned his back against the door and let himself fall to the floor.
"If you want me to go, I'll go. If you want me to stay, I'll stay. If you hate me, I'll never show my face again. I know what happened to you because of me. I watched the whole thing with my eyes open and I... I just... couldn't do anything."
His voice trembled for a moment, so he paused. He took a deep breath, then continued.
"So, now I will do whatever I can for you. Whatever you want, don't hesitate to tell me."
I didn't say anything, I couldn't.
Silence slowly filled the room.
I finally sat up, got out from under the covers, letting the feeling envelop my body. I felt my thoughts clouding again, but... it was peaceful.
No... I should be closer.
When I tried to get out of bed, I realized that my legs hurt, that it was difficult for me to take a step. Still, I approached the door, and without thinking for a moment I put my hand on the handle. But then... I hesitated again.
I can't... I'm not ready yet. I'm... scared.
I leaned my back against the door, just as he did, and slowly let myself fall to the floor.
The target of my anger was the only person I could relax and talk to. Even though I blamed him, he didn't yell at me, he just accepted it. He didn't hesitate to take my anger out on himself.
There was only a door between us. If I focused hard enough, I could even hear his breathing, and the feeling emanating from him felt more real and comforting than ever.
Just standing next to me, even if it was a strange reaction caused by my skill, filled me with serenity.
I pulled my legs to me, wrapped my arms around them, and put my head between my knees.
For the first time since the day I woke up, I felt like I could sleep properly.
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