684 Old habits Lilou wasn't testing Samael when she asked him to let her go. She deeply wanted to go home. But when she stood in front of the mansion where she had been staying for months and saw Stefan, one thing came clear.
She wasn't home.
This house and this man weren't what she thought she wanted to go to. They weren't the ones she meant when she said she wanted to go home. Although Stefan was an important person to her, he wasn't her home.
But that made her even more confused because she didn't understand her heart. Lilou was the person who would always listen to her heart and even wore it to her sleeve. But somehow, her heart was speaking a language that was alien to her and it was tearing her apart.
She felt sad the more she thought about Samael, but she just couldn't simply smile at him and embrace him with open arms. It felt like she was cheating and deceiving herself. Lilou couldn't do that to herself. She just couldn't charge head-on into something without thinking about it at least once.
Going with the flow… had always been her life. Lilou just gained control over her life, and she didn't want to lose it. It felt like she would lose a part of her if she just went with the flow… but it also felt the same by denying Samael. She felt like she had lost a part of her.
Lilou had thought about it all night. She barely had sleep, trying to stop her tears that were coming from an unknown source. But she just couldn't make up her mind overnight. Her feelings weren't a switch she could turn on and off easily.
So, even when the people she met last night were already in this mansion, she was still undecided.
"Good morning, my lady." Fabian greeted as he served food at the dining table. Lilou stood by the entrance, darting her puffy eyes at the people sitting around the table.
Stefan was sitting on the head seat, in his usual spot, enjoying a cup of coffee. On the first seat on his left was Tilly. She was already snacking some grapes without a care in the world. And then, her eyes fell on the person sitting on Stefan's right.
Samael.
"Good morning," Samael greeted with an indifferent air around him. "Your eyes were swollen. Are you alright?"
"Uh." Lilou instinctively covered her eyes by placing her hands over her brows. "Yes."
"Stefan, what did you do to her?" asked Samael nonchalantly, shifting his attention from her so as to not make her uncomfortable.
Stefan simply glanced at Samael and then at Lilou momentarily. "She ate too much last night. You didn't even feed her."
"Your point?"
"She got allergies." Tilly chimed in, causing Stefan's face to contort, but went with it anyway.
"She got allergies."
"Hah…" Samael laughed as he leaned forward, pointing at his brother. "Stefan, let me tell you something. Never listen to Tilly. She's the worst liar you'll meet in this life."
"Fabian is the worst."
"In my defense, Lady Tilly, I never lie." Fabian defended with a chuckle, placing a plate full of fruits in front of Tilly. "I simply don't detail things and keep it vague, leaving the conclusion for others to mull about."
"It seemed the butler also retained his memories. How surprising." Stefan glanced at Fabian as he talked like how he would talk.
"Cassara retrieved it for me." Samael shrugged, glancing at Lilou, who sat down two chairs away from him. His lips opened, but he bit his tongue to stop himself from telling her to sit beside him.
He didn't want to scare her since the more he tried, the more she would run away from him. So even if it was hard to ignore why her eyes were swollen, he had to bite his tongue multiple times to stop himself.
"You used Cassara?" Stefan's eyes darkened, watching Samael gaze back at him. "To retrieve that man's memories?"
"What are you going to do about it?" Samael cocked his head to the side. "I needed Fabian. I needed extra hands because time is my enemy."
"So you chose Cassara as collateral damage."
"If not her, should I let my family take the blow?" his lips curled up in mockery. "Stefan, even after life and death, you're still a hypocrite? That's some amazing talent. I'm not even joking."
Silence instantly fell in the dining hall and the air thickened as the tension between them rose almost instantly. Samael's and Stefan's eyes were sharp, exchanging taunting gazes, and both of them didn't back down. Anyone could tell they were just waiting for someone to initiate a fight, and they would happily take part in the altercation.
Clang… clang… clang…
Stefan and Samael furrowed their brows as the silence broke by the continuous sound of cutlery hitting the plate. They slowly shifted their attention to the source of the noise, only for them to see Lilou stuffing her mouth. Samael ran his tongue across his inner cheek as his eyes softened while Stefan let out a deep exhale.
"It's fun to see her ladyship still keep her old habits." Fabian was the first to break the ice, very familiar with Lilou's coping mechanism for stress. Lilou would tend to stuff her mouth with food every time she was stressed or pressured.
"You two should calm down." Tilly was still calm as she shoved a piece of grape into her mouth. "We will be squatting in this place since Heliot raided the place we were staying at last night."
Lilou nearly choked upon hearing Tilly's remarks, gazing at her with wide eyes. She then shifted her eyes to Stefan and Samael, only to catch them clicking their tongue at the same time.
"That damn Heliot…" Samael blew his lips as his face grew sour at the thought that crossed his head.
"It's your fault." Stefan was a little calmer, although he was clearly displeased at the thought of living under the same roof with his brother. "You knew Heliot since you've been allies before the reversal of time. So, how can you think he will be pleased if, instead of dealing with the horde of undead coming for your life, you led them all into this place?"
"What a stupid fool," he added, and received a scoff from Samael.
"And you joined hands with him despite knowing he is hostile towards me? Stefan, your hate for me is what really keeps me going!"
As the two brothers bantered, Lilou could not help but cringe at their conversation. She glanced at Tilly and somehow felt envious, as it seemed she was deaf. When she raised her eyes to Fabian, the latter smiled at her kindly.
"Please don't mind them. This is their only way of saying they missed each other."
"Shut up, Fabian."
"I will miss death, but never this abomination."
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