Chapter 87: Re:boot
Three days later.
My injuries had healed up unusually quickly, just like before, and the hospital had discharged me early.
Still, my left leg wasn't doing great, and I couldn't handle much walking around. Once I got back to my apartment, I didn't do anything in particular. I'd left my futon out, and I just lay on it, aimlessly staring at the TV. At school, summer term would be underway, but of course I didn't feel like going.
"This again, huh?"
Déjà vu. One year ago, just after I'd lost Siesta, the days had bled away like this. After a week, or maybe a month, I'd gone back to school, and my life had fallen into its tepid routine.
Right now, I couldn't even soak in that lukewarm water. I felt like I was lying in an ice-cold bath. Some foreign drama had been on the TV for a while now, but my brain wasn't picking up any of the plot. What time slot did they show foreign dramas in anyway, and on what day?
The curtains were closed, so my sense of time was totally shot. It felt like it had been three days since I had learned what I had learned, but I wasn't sure. I'd dozed briefly three times since I'd come home, that was all.
"—My phone."
I'd left it by my pillow. I tried to check the time on it, but the battery was dead. Ms. Fuubi was supposed to send word if anything happened with Charlie or Saikawa, but so far, no one had called.
In search of another way to locate Saikawa, I'd gotten in touch with a certain person...but there hadn't been any good news from that quarter, either.
In other words, I'd failed at everything.
Charlie was hanging between life and death because of me, and I hadn't been able to protect Saikawa from the enemy. I'd broken that promise I'd made with Hel, the one about not making Natsunagi cry, and I...
"I'm hungry."
The fact that my stomach could still growl at a time like this seemed like a
design flaw. I unsteadily got to my feet. Come to think of it, aside from water, I hadn't put a thing in my mouth since I got back.
I opened the fridge; it was empty. I wasn't up to going out, either mentally or physically, so I checked the entryway mailbox, hoping for some takeout flyers.
Inside, I found the usual:
Several notices about unpaid utility bills.
The exact sort of pizza delivery flyer I was after. And—one letter with no address.
Sender unknown.
I had no idea what this was, but since someone had put it in my mailbox, it seemed safe to assume it was for me.
Strangely, before paying my electricity bill, before calling in a pizza order, I felt like I had to read that letter. When I opened the envelope, I found two small sheets of paper.
"This...is..."
The letter began with "To Kimizuka."
"If you're reading this letter, it means I'm not with you anymore."
"—That sounds like a movie cliché. I never thought I'd be saying something like that. The thing is, I've got a bit of a hunch... Well, to be more precise, I've made up my mind. Siesta left you a letter, too; I'm not trying to copy her, but I'm also writing this at the apartment in London, while I watch you sleep. I do need just a little courage, so to tell you the truth, I had a bit to drink before I came here... I wonder if you noticed."
"So, I'm planning to give this letter to a certain cabin attendant, with instructions to give it to you if anything happens to me. Did you get it? Oh, but if you're reading it now, it must've worked out. Okay, good."
"I've never written a letter before, so I'm not actually sure what I should write first. To start with, I guess I'll make like a detective and do a little deducing."
"—Right now, Kimizuka, you're starving!" "Well? I'm right, aren't I?"
"According to my eerily accurate deduction, our sudden parting has left you
massively depressed. You've been holed up in your apartment for days, all alone, but you're going to have to eat something soon...and so you were dragging yourself outside when you noticed this letter. Yes, that feels like a solid prediction... What? You say you aren't that depressed?"
"That's incredibly annoying! Double-kill!" "...Kidding. Actually, I'm a little uneasy."
"I mean, it seems like Siesta's really all you see. It makes me wonder if you might not feel all that sad no matter what happens to me. Well, I'll never know what happened now... Even so, I think I'd like it if you cried a little."
"Um, actually, let me take that back. I just sounded super needy. 'As long as you're fine, Kimizuka, that's enough for me!' Yes, that should do nicely."
"Getting down to business, then." "First, I have a request for you."
"If you haven't managed to defeat Seed by the time you read this letter—I want you to personally take him down someday. No matter what. To tell you the truth, I've got a secret plan of my own...but there's no guarantee we'll be able to win that way. Even if I'm not there, you have lots of other friends you can count on, so I'm counting on you!"
"Next, an apology."
"It's been a while now, but do you remember that promise I made you?" "I said no matter what happened, I wouldn't die and leave you behind." "I'm sorry. I wasn't able to keep that promise... Are you mad?"
"I hope so... Just kidding."
"Finally, thank you."
"Thanks for all the times you helped me."
"A year ago, in London. Thank you for being kind to me, when I'd lost my memories. Thank you for putting that ring on my finger. Thank you for coming to save me, even when I'd been taken to the enemy's hideout."
"There's a whole lot more. You found the owner of my heart for me. You told me it was okay to live my own life. You rescued me from the enemy on that cruise ship. You forgave the crimes I'd committed. You encouraged me up on the roof that night. You said you'd have my back, and you've stayed with me all this time. Thank you."
"You gave me so much. Have I managed to repay even a little of it? I'm sure I've barely scratched the surface... I really would have liked to stay with you a bit longer. Not that I'm confessing my love for you or anything. Seriously, Kimizuka, you don't mean a thing to me."
"...That said, I don't know what you thought of me, but I didn't dislike you. There was no way I could. If this turns out to be goodbye, it's going to make me a little sad. —Still, as the detective, I'll complete my final job."
"When I do, I hope you'll praise me a little."
That was where the letter ended. "...What the hell."
It was all wrong.
Everything Natsunagi had said was wrong.
I won't get depressed if you're not there?
I haven't been able to move for three days. Just look at me.
I didn't have the energy to eat, I hadn't bathed, and my facial hair was growing in. Even now, I didn't want anything. I was just sitting there, on the floor, reading that letter. Why hadn't that gotten through to her?
One month ago—you're the one who pulled me out of that tepid routine. You held me close. When I tried to ignore Siesta's feelings, you scolded me. You cried in my place. On that pitch-black night, you swore you wouldn't leave me and die on your own. On the school roof, you said you'd be my friend. You stayed with me, all this time. I'm so—
"Didn't I tell her any of that?"
I'd never properly thanked Natsunagi.
She'd thanked me—clumsily, sometimes blushing, sometimes getting mad— but I hadn't.
In the truest sense of the word, I hadn't managed to tell her a thing. "Did I make the same mistake again?"
A year ago, death had parted me from Siesta before I could tell her anything. "I am stupid."
That same self-hating comment was an echo of last year. I was foolish. Pathetic. No matter how much I regretted it, though, it was too late. The detective was already—
"...gk!"
My hands clenched on the letter, crumpling it.
Then I realized there was something written on the back of the second sheet. When I turned it over, it said "P.S." and then:
"I forgot one thing! Don't think I'm the sort of girl who'd die for nothing, all right?"
"What's that supposed to mean?"
I couldn't figure that line out, and as I puzzled over it—a soft wind suddenly blew.
When had I opened a window?
I turned, trying to see where the breeze was coming from.
"This key is one of my Seven Tools. There's no lock it can't open." I should have been alone in the room, but a girl's voice spoke.
I'd heard that line before.
She'd gotten into my apartment without permission, then watched a foreign drama and eaten pizza as if she owned the place.
She was here now, right in front of me.
Her bobbed hair was pale silver, and her blue eyes pulled you right in. Her dress was a flattering color, apparently modeled on some country's military uniform, and the glimpses of skin I caught beneath it were as clear as snow.
She was as beautiful as an angel incarnate. If you looked up beauty in the dictionary, her name was bound to be there. If you ran a search of her name online, you can bet the related images would have been photos of flowers and birds and the moon.
Which was why all my interest just then was focused on her name. Unlike four years ago, though, I knew that name—her code name. "...Hey, that's trespassing."
"Calm down. The only apartment I invade without asking is yours, Kimi." As she joked with me, just as she'd done on another day, she came closer. "Say, Assistant."
With a smile that was a hundred million watts of adorable, the white-haired girl softly held out her left hand to me.
"Let's go on a journey to save our friends again."
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